Glass Book THE SULTAN'S WIVES; OR, A YISIT TO THE SERAGLIOS. By L. DUNNE, LATE OF HER MAJESTY'S STORES AT THE BOSPHORUS. Jetton : J. SHEPPAUD, PRINTER, 30, ROCHESTER ROW, S.W. U, .... 3p PREFACE. Through the advice of friends I have altered the title of this hook. The first edition was called a " Trip to Constanti- nople," the " Women of Turkey," &c, &c. When writing it I had no idea of its heing published, or that many of the general public would see it; I merely intended it for those who passed through or resided at Constantinople during the Crimean War ; but from the many applications for copies, I am induced to have more printed, and to make this alteration, which it is thought will agree better with the reading. I have no pre- tensions to writing, and when I assure you this is my maiden attempt, perhaps you may say " Well, it is not so bad for a beginner." In my opinion a person about to write his first book, resembles one about to pop the question — he is so bewildered to know how to commence ; whereas practised writers or widowers do not feel so much concern except when pounds, shillings, and pence are in question. Some may say that it is all very well, but why do you make the alteration if it is not with the idea of making money? Decidedly it is ; everyone wishes his undertaking to become as successful as possible ; and although I may feel as desirous as my neighbours to pocket the cash, still I assure you my chief object is to try to prop up a readable sketch of a life in the Seraglios — which sketch I give not from heresay or sur- mise, but from facts experienced both by Brown and myself. I am sorry I have described Brown's visit in the shape of a dream, but I thought it would be better to draw a veil of mystery over a portion of that midnight adventure when he really did visit the fair Belinda — not encumbered with slum- ber, but with bis eyes open to the fate which awaited him did the eunuchs but perceive him. For a trifling consideration an interpreter accompanied him, and thus it is I give so detailed an account of their conversation on the roof of the Seraglio ; not only Brown but your humble servant received letters from the ladies of the Seraglio, which a gentleman, who is now at the War Office, can certify, as our Greek Interpreter to whom I entrusted the interpretation of a few of the letters, informed him of it ; this gentleman having held a high position at the Bosphorus, in the Civil Department. If any one should doubt my statement, they can, by enquiry, easily get to know who he is. There is also a person at the Tower, who is aware of it. I mention this merely to contradict the assertions of those inexperienced persons who state that it was or is impossible to carry on any correspondence with inmates of Seraglios. I am glad of this opportunity to contradict such statements, as in the absence of contradiction, some persons might fancy Brown's visit to the Seraglio, and other incidents to which I refer, were imaginary ideas, merely made up as home-spun yarns. I am aware, that, had a clever writer the opportunity which I had, he would be able to draw such a picture of Harem life, that would both surprise and amuse those not acquainted with eastern customs. I could not pourtray the thrilling as well as enchan- ting scenes connected with these abodes of loneliness and intrigue ; the principal one, namely, the old Seraglio, which is the theme of my narrative, has latterly been consumed by fire. I wish it had occurred while we were there, we might at least have had an opportunity of assisting the ladies to escape from the flames. As regards the criticism to which my narrative has been subject, I shall merely observe, that, as every one who presumes to subscribe himself an author ; must submit to the lash of critics, I, as well as others, bow to the decision of the respectable portion of them, who impartially introduced it ; but those who cannot or will not give an impartial review, as it is evident the public do not heed them, I can afford to despise them, so long as my book is perused by those for whom it is intended, namely, the ladies, and the sensible portion of the lords of the creation. I care not how many Joseph Henry Theophilus's may read it. There are a few typographical errors, but as these are often found in the compositions of clever writers, I need scarcely apologize for them. L.D. Pimlico, London, December 1th, 1863. CON T E N T S. A Stroll through Galata 8 The Eunuch's soliloquising address to Belinda — Brown behind the scenes : . 14 The Armenians as Turkish Hack-horses 22 Dialogue between the Ambassador and his Lady .... 29 The Porpoise-looking Turk, and Sham Cash-boxes 84 The English Stores adjoining the Seraglio 38 Brown's Song 49 The Eunuchs as Maid s-of- All -Work 59 Belinda's Song , „ , .... 70 Brown's Dream — His Visit to the Seraglio, and attempt to release Belinda 73 The Old Seraglio at Stamboul 104 The Pilgrim's Departure for Mecca . ... 115 St. Patrick's Day at Constantinople 125 The Fire 128 Drowning the Saint 139 Miss Nightingale at Scutari Hospital 146 Scutari Hospital at Night , .... 156 Homeward Bound • .... 164 Browns Song 177 Our Fleet at Sea ... 181 Brown, Jones, and Kobinson at Home 187 Letter No. 1. — From Brown to Jones and Kobinson 188 >j » » j? >> » • » • 193 » „ 3. „ „ „ 199 „ » 4. „ „ , 204 A STROLL THROUGH GAL ATA Many persons are of opinion that a trip to Turkey is accompanied with the most pleasant incidents imaginable. I once heard a lady remark, that from the description given her of the beautiful scenery of the Bosphorus, Con- stantinople must be the most delightful place in existence. I have no inclination to try to erase from the imagination of that lady the charming picture she has drawn ; but to verify the old proverb, that all is not gold which glitters, I would have her accompany me for a walk through Constantinople. I propose we start from Galata Bridge, and by the time we pass through the horrid precincts of Tophana, and arrive at the Hotel of all Nations, Para, although the distance is not more than a mile or mile and a-half I am satisfied my fair companion would cry " Yoke B 4 A STROLL THROUGH GAL AT A. bono," (no good,) and that her enthusiasm for the Turks and admiration of Turkey would cease to exist. From on board a ship in the Bosphorus, of a midsummer's evening, when gazing towards the Valley of the Sweet Waters, Princes Island, Scutari, or Para, one certainly would imagine that Constantinople was, as this lady believes it to be, the most delightful place in existence. But how disappointed when one enters its streets ! if streets I may term them, as the stones by which they are supposed to be paved are in many instances three or four inches apart ; so that, if not most careful in picking your steps, you would be certain to leave the heel, sole, or some other portion of your boots, to fill up the space. Then there are to be met, wandering in every direction, droves of starved-looking dogs, which, although of too drowsv a nature to be offensive, are never- theless disagreeable, and would compel the most considerate members of our humane societies to have resort to the toe of his boot to make room to pass. I once remarked to a Frenchman what drowsy-looking animals these Turkish dogs were, when, with a shrug of the shoulder, he drily replied, that in many instances they A STROLL THROUGH GAL AT A. 5 strongly resembled their masters ; whom, he added, did not mind what amount of kicks or cuffs they received, so long as they were per- mitted to exist on the crumbs of idleness, and crawl unheeded through their filthy resorts of wretchedness. The legion of prowling dogs is not the only nuisance one has to contend with, as there are in almost every locality, but in Galata and Stamboul in particular, groups of the most mendicant and peculiar-looking beings conceivable, who, as a pretence for begging, carry with them pipes and other tomfoolery commodities, which they not only pitilessly but impudently exhort one to purchase. Although aware that their trumperies are of no value, yet, anxious to get rid of such pests, you give them a few piasters, which encourages them to pounce with renewed vigour on the next comers. You have no sooner got rid of these ex- Petticoat Lane traders, and expecting to enjoy an undisturbed stroll, than you are accosted by, as they term themselves, the proprietors of smoking saloons. Being fatigued with constant up-hill travelling, occasionally tumbling over dogs and begging lamentations, you are anxious for repose ; and b 2 6 A STROLL THROUGH GALATA* hearing so much about these smoking concerns, willingly accept the invitation of " Step in Johnny ; Bono chabouk." They call all English folks Johnny. Bono means good — chabouk sig- nifies pipe. You are no sooner seated than your curiosity is raised to its highest pitch, by instead, as you expected, of only beholding drowsy-looking drones of Pashas, or others of the masculine gender, you perceive groups of females, who seem to enjoy their pipes or cigarettes with as much composure and conversational pleasure as might be bestowed by a party of Belgravian ladies over a cup of coffee or dish of strawberries. Having approached as near to the female smokers as the rules of the establishment would permit, and satisfying yourself that, although apparently extensive consumers of that noxious weed, some of them were in reality the most beautiful beings in existence, you could not help sighing for their fate ; and when loosed from the bonds of curiosity, if not admiration, which would induce one to remain, I cannot say how long, gazing upon them, you would feel proud in not belong- ing to that nation, where, by indolence and forgetfulness, its fairest inhabitants are from A STROLL THROUGH GAL AT A. 7 their infancy only instructed in the vices of idleness and immorality. Your thoughts would immediately wander to your native isle ; nor could you avoid silently uttering the old saying- There is no place like home. For a moment you look, as it were, into the unfathomable subter- ranean of surmise, and try to perceive the cause of degradation and want of self- esteem which is manifest in all grades of society ; but you look in vain. The dark veil of mystery by which all Turkish deeds are covered, prevents the possi- bility of your being able to thoroughly understand the cause ; still you are satisfied that the blame cannot be attributable to these thoughtless uneducated girls, who, from their infancy are taught to indulge in every species of Harem vices. It is well known that when mammas are of opinion that their daughters are of that promising caste which at some future time might render them eligible for the Sultan's, or other first-class Harems, they have them instructed in the arts of music, singing, and dancing. When studying the latter, particular attention is bestowed on those of dalliance and other amorous allurements. They clothe them in the richest and gayest 8 A STROLL THROUGH GALATA. attire of their native costume ; and, as regards resorting to paint and perfumes, the Turkish women excel all others in this artificial mode of appearing under false pretences. So far do they indulge in this ridiculous and injurious habit, ? that they colour their eyebrows and paint their finger-nails. And when mammas are of opinion that no man, be he Sultan or otherwise, can resist their charms, they select a place for promenading near the Sultan's Grand Vizier's or other distinguished Pashas' residences, where they are certain to attract the attention of these old sensualists. From the charming prospect pictured to their imagination, these young and beautiful girls only sigh to participate in the pleasures of the Harem : their sole ambition is to try to win a Sultan's smile or Pasha's approval. Poor simpletons ! they might as hopelessly expect to turn night into day as try to gain the affection of one or favour of the other. The Sultan may deign to smile, but his smile is like that of an adder, which may, when its victim is helpless before it, say, " Thou mayest tarry yet, as my appetite just now does not necessitate thy destruc- tion ; but ere you leave thou shalt taste of my poi- A STROLL THROUGH GAL AT A. 9 son." He may smile on one or more of them, and by so doing hasten their destruction ; as no sooner do they fancy he looks favourably upon them, than their bosoms become steeled with the fiendish armour of ambition, jealousy, or revenge. The victory they fancy they have temporary gained by their beauty and amorous attentions, they try to permanently establish by intrigue ; all the influence they can command, through eunuchs or otherwise, is brought to bear against their rivals. War once proclaimed in the Harems, there is no probability of peace, except by the total annihilation of one, or perhaps both con- tending parties, as neither will surrender the stronghold they fancy they possess in his Majes- ty's affections. But how hopeless are their surmises, for after resorting to all manner of intrigue and calumny, and anticipating the boundless joy of one day becoming Sultana, the Sultan unexpectedly visits the Seraglio, when, instead of meeting his former favourite wjtlt a smile, he greets her with a frown. What is the cause of this sudden token of displeasure ? She looks inquiringly towards him, but he returns not her gaze— a moment suffices to solve 10 A STROLL THROUGH GAL AT A. the reason. She beholds him intently gazing upon a fair accomplished damsel, daughter to a rich and powerful Pasha, who on that morning was admitted into the Seraglio, and in feverish excitement was waiting to be presented by the chief eunuch to the Sultan as his favourite, because for the time being his last wife. The despised one whispers to herself " He is lost to me. All my efforts to establish myself in his affections have failed ; he is heartless, he is cruel ; I will not live, only to be despised. Yet I must be revenged." Despair, which in the hour of adversity, generally hovers around the fragments of ambition and jealousy, whispers in her ear, " Thou shalt be the password of scorn and reproach all through the Harems. Thou, whom his Majesty once deigned to designate as his loveliest and best beloved, art now an outcast from his affections, nay, even from his society. It is evident from his attention to this new, and I must acknowledge, accomplished lady, that you can no more pride yourself in being the favourite you once were ; and now that thou art despised and deprived of what made life a trea- sure, namely, a place in his Majesty's affections, oaiis't thou live ? If thou cans't, I envy not thy A STROLL THROUGH GALATA. 11 lot. So fare thee well. But ere I depart, permit me to observe that if thou desirest to put an end to that existence which henceforth would be but a memorial of thy misery and rebuke, thou hadst better have recourse to either of those messengers of peace " — pointing to a silken cord and cup of poison, which among the desponding portion (who are not few) of the inmates of Harems, bear the titles of messengers of peace. Despair, hav- ing successfully advocated the necessity of her resorting to either of these messengers of peace, departed; and, ere his serpentine words had died upon her ears, she flew to his proposed remedy, and in that hour of desperation put an end to her existence. Such is the manner in which the dreams, the hopes, and anticipated pleasures of many of these beautiful girls are extinguished in the sunshine of their youth. > Sad is their fate while living ! their only desire is to try to win the smile of him who cannot entertain the least spark of affectionate feeling for any particular one of them. Their beauty, companionship, and girlish innocence, is by him only esteemed in the same light as boys esteem their toys, which, when a short time in their possession, they long to have 12 A STROLL THROUGH GAL AT A. replaced by others of a more pleasing, because newer description. A life in the Harems is a wretched existence, for, notwithstanding that everything which money or skill can produce is placed at the disposal of their inmates, still there is a void, a dull desponding space, which neither the presence of gilded saloons nor rich draperies can ever supply; there is in the bosoms of their occupants, a doubt and a fear which, in the royal presence, may be hushed or subdued, partly through hope and partly through respect; but the moment the Sultan departs from the reception room, or what is commonly called the Bower of Pleasure, when the ladies return to their solitary apartments, despair again hovers around them, as on their return they have no one to greet them except their forbidding looking eunuchs, who address them in something of the following style, for the accuracy of which I can vouch, as one of three persons to whom I will presently introduce to you, happened tostealatrip in the eunuch's absence to his lady's apartments. You have often heard of gallants, on the unexpec- ted arrival of the master or mistress^ having to take refuge in the coal-hole or other such hiding A STROLL THROUGH GALATA. 13 place. Well, I assure you, my friend had to resort to a more strange place of concealment, which, fortunately for him, turned out to be the most secure he could have selected, as the wily eunuch on his return, with his wonted surmising instinct, searched all other conceivable places ; and when satisfied that no other unprivileged individual was nigh, he addressed her as follows, upon the disappointment she experienced in not being the chosen of the Sultan on his visit that morning. THE EUNUCH'S SOLILOQUISING ADDRESS TO BELINDA. BKOWN BEHIND THE SCENES. Me werry sorry, misses, dat de Sultan had not better taste and more sense dan not to accept thy company for dis day. Me did all dat could be done to make thee look the prettiest ; me plaited your hair so beautiful, painted your eyebrows, cheeks, and finger nails so life-like, and arranged your crinolines and the tother numerous unmention- ables so skilfully, that when you were tripping along the lawn, the birds on the trees used to ask each other who you were, from whence you came, or would you always remain with them, when their melody should ever be poured forth in your praise ; and this, misses* I assure you was a high tribute to be paid by the feathered songsters of THE EUNUCH'S SOLILOQUISING ADDRESS TO BELINDA* 15 the old Seraglio, as many a time from their high perches have they beheld a lovely bride joyfully hasten to meet his Majesty at the Bower of Pleasure, but never did they or could they behold one more exquisitely charming than you were this morning ; and although I do not desire to claim any portion of praise, still my taste and attention may have added a little to the natural loveliness of thee, whom no one except his Majesty could forbear loving." Ere he had finished the last sentence, a eunuch who acts as equerry to the Sultan during his visits to the Seraglio, tapped at the door and informed Belinda (as I will hence- forth term her) that it was his Majesty's desire she should, on the morrow, attend at the annual ceremony of witnessing the departure of the Pil- grim for Mecca. She informed him it gave her much pleasure to comply with his Majesty's com- mands; " But," returned this representative of royalty, " you forget, lady, that this is nocommand, but a favour. On to-morrow, when the Pashas and elite of Constantinople will be assembled at Seraglio Point, to witness the Pilgrim's de- parture, his Majesty deems it a favourable op- portunity of proving by the presence of the ladies 16 THE EUNUCH'S SOLILOQUISING of the Harems that he has made a judicious choice in his selection of the fair and noble Aurora as his favourite wife." " Am I to under- stand you," interrupted Belinda, "that his Majesty is on the morrow resolved to parade this high- born prude, and, by our presence, signify that we are satisfied she should be his favourite ? Never ! Tell his Majesty that I, for one, will not, by my presence, encourage such a hope. I would prefer resorting to either the silken cord or cup of poison, sooner than submit to behold this would-be accomplished Circassian occupy that place in his Majesty's affections which others should possess. I do not, by these remarks, mean to infer that I am entitled to, or ever hoped to become the possessor of, that shadowy treasure ; but if every girl in her teens, the moment she enters the Harem, can attract his Majesty's attentions, it strikes me that it is time to have some remedy applied which might cause his Majesty's affections to become a little more lasting. There are many of us, who, since our admission into this purgatorial place, have never shared his society, nor are we allowed to hold converse with any other lord of the ADDRESS TO BELINDA. 17 creation. There are three Engleteras stationed in charge of her Britannic Majesty's stores, and sent from that great nation to aid us ; yet, although they reside close to us, we must not, we dare not, so much as welcome them. The laws of our country will not allow us to even hold converse with Christians. What an absurd, tyrannical prohibition ! I am sure these Engla- teras are noble and generous, and deem us the most uncouth of beings for the coldness we manifest towards them ; but it is not our fault if they be not welcomed in that friendly and polite manner which their mission and courtesy deserve." " You have become so sentimental con- cerning these Englateras," replied the equerry, " that you forget I am impatiently waiting to convey to his Majesty your consent or refusal to attend at the morrow's ceremony. Pray, which of the two, your first or last reply, am I to take to his Majesty?" To this query he received no reply, as poor Belinda, so overcome with the numerous conflicts of the mind, and disappointments of the day, fell into a swoon which claimed the attendance of her eunuch, and caused the departure of the equerry, who 18 the eunuch's soliloquising on his return to the Sultan, found his Majesty in anything but a pleasant mood. His Majesty first inquired the cause of delay, and next the reply, which puzzled the equerry to satisfactorily answer; after muttering something about Mecca and to-morrow, he informed his Majesty that in consequence of Belinda becoming suddenly ill, she could not decide. "111!" replied his Majesty, " and pray what is the cause of her illness ? Some Greek adventurer, I doubt not, has been serenading about the Seraglio — or perhaps it may be that she sighs to go to England ? I did not like the attentions paid to some of the ladies, but to one in particular, on the occasion of our last visit to the English stores, when one of these Engiateras, from the raising of his hat and other marked attentions, impressed me with the belief that some other motive pervaded his thoughts beside complimenting me. Let what I now command be strictly adhered to. No more are the ladies of the Harems to promenade in the ground adjoining the English stores. Sick ; let me see, I cannot bring to mind to which lady this Englatera paid such attention — can you assist my memory, Melcon ? " addressing the ADDRESS TO BELINDA. 19 chief eunuch : " No, most powerful and gracious master, but methinks I can tell thee what can. Me bring thee all the ladies' photographs, and by reviewing them, your gracious Majesty may be able to bring to mind which of their originals it was to whom that dog of a Christian dare pay such attention/' "Excellent," replied his Majesty; "bring me instantly the likenesses." But ere the cunning eunuch had time to carry out his resolve, a messenger arrived from the telegraph office with the disagreeable news that the Eussians had gained the day at Sebastopol — had burned the allied fleet, killed all the allied soldiers, and were victoriously marching towards Constanti- nople. This sudden and disagreeable news so prostrated the still Sultan, that for a considerable time he was pronounced lifeless, and from this has sprung one of the insinuations that the sick man was pronounced incurable. The fact of this false alarm arriving at so favourable a moment saved poor Belinda from a severe chastisement, as a look at the likenesses would bring to his recollection that it was to her the Englatera paid such atten- tion. This, with refusing to attend at the morrow's ceremony, would be sufficient to induce him to c 20 THE EUNUCH'S SOLILOQUISING discard her, whereby she would be subject to all the torture which jailor- eunuchs might think proper to inflict. As it is an ill wind that blows nobody good news, the rumour of the Russians gaining so decisive a victory, although spreading conster- nation among the Mussulman population, but particularly among the inmates and proprietors of Harems, was a talisman of joy to Belinda, as it saved her from being arraigned before his Majesty, accused of carrying on clandestinely a correspondence with an Englatera ; and with a jury composed of eunuchs and rival ladies, she, no doubt, would be found guilty of inconstancy and compelled to submit to its horrid penalties. When recovered from her swoon, she reviewed in as short a space of time as possible the strange incidents of the day, and anticipated the fo,nd hope of hearing of the Englatera's safe return to his comrades, who were beginning to become anxious about his absence. They knew he often gazed towards a certain westerly window ; but they had no idea he would venture on the perilous mission of striving to get to whisper the gospel of love in the ears of Belinda ; but where there is a will there is mostly a way, so that most likely ADDRESS TO BELINDA. 21 he did not contemplate on the seriousness of his undertaking, or, if he did, that he was re- solved to risk the danger for the gratification of having, as he imagined, an undisturbed interview with her. But the old saying that lovers' paths are more frequently strewn with thorns than roses, was fully verified on that occasion ; so much so, that he had on the first opportunity, without uttering good night, to stealthily bolt from his hiding place, and the night being dark and stormy, which caused the sentinels to remain in- doors, he safely arrived at his quarters. When leaving his hiding place a rat-tat announced the second arrival of the equerry, whom I will for the present leave in stormy debate with Belinda, and again continue my trip through Galata and Para. c 2 THE ARMENIANS AS TURKISH HACK-HORSES. After bestowing a last look on the fair smokers, and fancying you might then be permitted to enjoy an undisturbed stroll through Para, you are no sooner emerged from the smoky region of Galata, than you are, if not on the alert, thrown on all-fours by gangs of Armenians, who, like bul- locks in harness, cany enormous freights of mer- chandise, or other commodities. It is surprising to witness the immense weight which four or six of these can contrive to carry on poles, which rest upon their shoulders. The Armenians of Turkey may justly be termed the Turkish hack-horses. In Constantinople there are no such things as waggons, carts, or such mode of mercantile con- veyances ; there are some trumpery things called THE ARMENIANS AS TURKISH HACK-HORSES. 23 arabagees, which consist of a few flat boards nailed together, with an imitation of axletree and wheels ; these are mostly drawn by two old cows whose milking days having long expired, and when no longer able to stand under the arabagee, are killed. Did I say killed ? Oh no, I made a serious mistake, as mostly all of them die without the aid of a butcher, and their meat is, by the Turks, not only deemed delicious and delicate, but highly flavoured. Nor can I see how it could be otherwise, considering the quantity of garlic and other strong scented garbage with which they savour it. Constantinople is so situate that, were it in the possession of more enlightened and business people than the lazy drones who now possess it, they would find it almost impossible to carry on their general traffic with vehicles. There are no such nice conveyances to be seen dashing about with their fair and fascinating occupants, as carriages, phaetons, chaise or 'busses. The Sultan has a few obsolete-looking cabs which the eunuchs term Misses' carriages, but which are not in workmanship or appearance equal to our third-class cabs or old hackney coaches. With these representatives of olden 24 THE ARMENIANS times they can only drive from the old Seraglio, Stamboul, over Galata Bridge, through Tophana, to the New Palace of Dolma Baktche ; the other portions of Constantinople are too up-hill for coaches or cab driving ; sedan chairs are all the ton, particularly for the lady portion, and more especially on the occasion of going to the opera. There being no lamps or lights of any description in the streets, each individual has to carry a lantern made of paper, containing a small piece of candle, which, if by a sudden gush of wind or other casualty, happening to become extinguish- ed, its bearer is left in the dark, most likely ankle- deep in mud and wet, and at the mercy of brigand Greeks who infest every lonely locality, from whence, if an opportunity presents, they pounce upon you, and not only rifle your pockets, but make you taste of their daggers, which they keep concealed under their wolfish cloth- ing. I saw floating on the water at Galata Bridge one Sunday morning, as many as four corpses of sailors, who, there is not the least doubt, were inveigled by these assassins into some of the horrid dens about Galata, and when eased of their money, to verify the old AS TURKISH HACK-HORSES. 25 saying, that " dead men can tell no tales," they, after murdering them, sent their bodies to find a bed in the bottom of the billows. My friends at the Tower can certify that. Except we were armed to the teeth and mustering at least half- a-dozen strong, we could not, with any certainty of escaping the daggers of these midnight assas- sins, venture through many portions of Galata after dark. The lady who so much admires Turkey would, I fancy, find it a disagreeable operation to have to pass through any portion of Constantinople after dusk — their is a deal of difference in walking their and through the shady side of Belgravia. But, as the saying tells us, when people go to Rome, they must do as Rome does, so with our fair ones ; whenever they venture out after dusk, except they preferred walking ankle-deep in mud and wet, they had to avail themselves of a chair ride. I can never forget with what feelings of pleasure I one night witnessed two cavalry officers get what may be termed a thorough ducking while waiting out- side the opera door to convey the Desdemona to her lodgings. These gallants, although in full dress uniform and the rain coming down in 26 THE ARMENIANS torrents, never left their post, which was situate in a dark corner near the back entrance to the opera, their charge being an empty sedan chair, which they had in anticipation of having the honour of carrying this coquetting Italian to her villa in the suburbs of Para. But alas ! this ex-nightingale proved to be as false as she was fair ; she gave them the slip, and left our heroes to return with the empty chair, and, if they felt inclined, to sing that applicable song, " We've got no work to do-oo. We've got no work to do-oo." They must have been much mortified on finding that the bird had flown, and that they, after so long and heroically braving the brunt of the rain and storm, had to retreat without their dear little songster. That has not been the only occasion on which I beheld gallants rebuked or disappointed for their painstaking. But, as disagreeable repulses were experienced by almost everyone while at Con- stantinople, I must not be too pointed with any particular case. I am surprised that none of the ladies who were located in Turkey during the Crimean War, and who had ample oppor- tunities afforded them of seeing the necessity of alteration being made in the costume and AS TURKISH HACK-HORSES. 2.7 habits of the Turkish women — instead of sup- plying the readers of certain journals with milk- and-water accounts of Turkish baths, have not written a bold and correct account of the tyranny exercised over the women, and by so doing endeavour to enlist public sympathy in their behalf, which, if once thoroughly enlisted, would go far in breaking the chains of tyranny and contempt by which they are so mercilessly bound. It is all very well for a lady after she becomes the guest of a distinguished Pasha, to write in favour of his magnificent baths ; we are all aware of the luxury by which these good-for- nothing drones are surrounded. Would it not be more preferable to hear of a lady, although she enjoyed the hospitality of these opium-consumers, to act the more noble part of proclaiming the iniquity by which they are surrounded ? Of course, it answered Pasha's purposes to forward invitations to English ladies, and be seemingly most amiable and attentive to them — as what lady, after being received so hospitally as to have black attendants to carry her out of bed, and almost unconsciously place her in one of those Harem paradises adjoining the baths — what lady 28 THE ARMENIANS AS TURKISH HACK-HORSES. could, after having these and many other delicate attentions lavished upon her, turn round and write against the folly or immorality of that dear old man having over a dozen or as many young wives as he possibly could keep ? Away with the Harems, and the hereditary claims of levying taxes for a plurality of wives, and Turkey may yet represent a bright figure in the Map of Nations ! DIALOGUE BETWEEN THE AMBASSA- DOR AND HIS LADY. I peesume all of you are aware that an ambassador in a country like Turkey reigns almost as regal as the potentate at whose court he is ambassador ; he is a great man — can as cleverly wield the wand of power abroad as stem the tide of public opinion at home, and by the length of his official despatches show that he is hard worked, that his mind is engrossed with foreign affairs which chiefly tend to home matters. Nor is his lady much behind her lord in unravell- ing the knotty intricacies of diplomacy ; she by her smile or " How do you do, Monsieur ? " is able very often to smooth the most ruffled waves of opposi- tion, and by her graceful appearance in the ball- room, command the respectful attention, if not 30 DIALOGUE BETWEEN THE admiration, of all Knights of the Garter. That lord who is anything of a diplomatist, and that lady who can nimbly lead off in a galloping polka or waltz, are sure, during their ambassadorship, to lie upon a bed of roses ; although in a country like Turkey, where the laws are so rotten and the government on so tottering a foundation, an occasional thorn may appear among the roses ; but it no sooner appears than the lady ambassadress, with her wand of smiles, compels it to depart. Hence it is that bachelor ambassadors, although carrying with them ever so plentiful a supply of efficient credentials of public estimation, can but seldom wind up their tenure of office so satisfactorily as he who has a helpmate, who, with her smile or " Good morning," can banish dull care. On conversing one evening with an intelligent old Greek, who, when in a talkative mood, would go a-head, our conversation turned upon the responsibility and influence attached to the post of ambassador, when my old acquaintance said, " An ambassador is all very well in his place ; he can do either a deal of good or a deal of harm. It is all very well for him to laud this or that Sultan, or praise the straightforward policy of this or AMBASSADOR AND HIS LADY. 31 that Pasha, while at the same time, he can, with a glance from his cosy bower, behold one of the most shaky constitutional fabrics in existence. Nay, more ; he has only to look in the direction of the old Seraglio, Stamboul, and from that catacomb of immorality and iniquity he can trace all the destructive machinery which causes the Turkish Empire to be placed in so unenviable a position." " I must confess," said he, that were I ambassador, I might, for the sake of a reign of smiles from Sultanas or quietness from fanatical priests during my ambassadorship, let well alone, and do as my predecessors had done, not trouble myself with what might cause me a deal of correspondence, some ill-will, and no profit." An ambassador's lady may, when passing through Galata, Tophana, or other precincts of wretchedness and crime, on her return to the embassy be resolved to intercede for an alteration of the laws which causes such wretchedness. But on her ladyship's return to Para, she beholds a mounted lacquey depart from the embassy. When she enters her fairy-like apartments, in her recollection may still linger the amount of misery she beheld. She seats 32 DIALOGUE BETWEEN THE herself with all the determination imaginable to truly represent to her husband the wretchedness she perceived, and the evils which she is satisfied to a great extent caused it, namely, indifference towards women and encouragement of Harems ; but ere her ladyship's resolve arrives at maturity, or that she has even baptised it with the name of " I shall," her husband presents himself, and, after expending the usual amount of soft sawder which it is said married folks keep in reserve for the occasion of their better-halves' return after a pleasure or exploring journey, his lordship informs her ladyship that Ali Somebody had just dispatched a courier, inviting them — this being his highness's birth-day — to partake of his hos- pitality at his princely mansion on the banks of the Bosphorus. Her ladyship at first displays signs of unwillingness to accept the invitation, but his lordship, with his usual power of diplo- matic persuasion, soon convinces her that by attending it would add much to their popularity among the well-to-do portion of the Mussulman population. Her ladyship consents ; and from the homage paid them as the chief representatives of so powerful a nation as- , they are 33 AMBASSADOR AND HIS LADY. no doubt, highly delighted — so much so, that henceforth the misery-stricken portion of the population find no place in their consideration. It is impossible for any, except those who have been intimately connected with embassies, to form anything like a correct estimate of all the agreeable advantages to be derived from attending ministerial or other Eastern anniversary dinners; but neither the pleasure to be derived from attending Pashas' banquets, nor of meeting a Sultan on the quiet at Tophana, will ever stimulate the indolent Turks to turn their attention to industry, nor cause the sove- reignty of the nations these ambassadors repe- sent to be one whit the more respected at Constantinople. THE PORPOISE LOOKING TURK AND SHAM CASH-BOXES. I will, for the present, leave the grand province of Para, and direct my course to Seraglio Point or Stamboul, where, on one's arrival, the smell of garlic and tobacco which proceeds from provision stalls and smoking saloons would almost stifle Old Nick. On arriving in this truly Mus- sulman locality, my attention was first attracted by beholding a Turk of herculean dimensions — at least so far as bloated flesh constituted him — who, with the aid of two black slaves, was en- deavouring to crawl from his door to the corner of a verandah, about thirty yards distant ; and although this porpoise-looking individual was neither maimed or ill, but through sheer lazi- ness, it took him, with the assistance of his THE P0B.P0ISE-L00KING TURK AND SHAM CASH-BOXES 35 slaves, full ten minutes to accomplish the jour- ney, when by the aid of the slaves, he contrived to get seated on a low stool ; it then took him nearly as long to get his legs crossed, which I afterwards learned is customary among Turks when about to indulge in a few hours' smoking. His legs crossed which seemed to be a trying operation, the next part of the performance was to see that his huge pipe was properly charged and in smoking order. When satisfied on this point, he commenced action, when puff, puff went the smoke, until a stranger would imagine he was about to convert the whole locality into a smoky region. Although I mention this por- poise-looking individual in particular, I after- wards found that thousands of others imitate his horrid lazy example. When not smoking their pipes, or lounging in smoking saloons, they are lolling with their wives ; and when going any distance from their residences, be it ever so short, they must ride upon a gentle Arabian horse, and not only have to be lifted into the saddle, but have to be accompanied by half-a- dozen lacqueys, four of whom it takes to hold him on horseback, and two to act as outriders on D 36 THE PORPOISE -LOOKING TURK foot — yes, on foot. You may laugh at the idea, but it is a fact which cannot be denied. If he be what is termed a well-to-do Pasha, has a select Harem, and at least a dozen young wives, besides the six attendants on foot, he is accom- panied by two on horseback, who act as pipe and purse-bearers ; the former carries the pipe, and, when arrived at their destination, be it the House of Representatives or otherwise, sees that it is in smoking order, and with a full charge presents it to his master. Only think of one of our dukes or earls, on arriving at the House of Lords, pulling out a huge pipe and commence smoking ! would he not very soon have many anx- ious friends who would assert that the poor dear fellow was not capable of managing his own affairs, but they as friends should be appointed to look after his pounds, shillings and pence department ? The other carries with him not a purse, although bearing the title of purse-bearer, but a tin box which, from appearance, as it rests upon the horses' shoulders, is large enough to contain more money than the government possesses. This personage is supposed, when on their route, to receive petitions ; if any of them be soli- AND SHAM CASH-BOXES. 37 citing relief, and on examining them he believes their authors or bearers to be deserving of aid, he is supposed to relieve them — but there is a world-wide difference between Turkish supposing and doing. This mock show of purse-bearer is, like all other Mussulman pretensions, only an absurdity , a poor beggarly appendage, which exists but in show and name. I do not believe these sham cash-boxes contain a piaster (two pence). I resided for nearly two years in the vicinity of Stamboul, where I daily beheld groups of starved- looking individuals present petitions or solicit assistance, but never did I witness a purse-bearer exercise the benevolent duty of relieving one of them. So much for Turkish show, Turkish generosity, and Turkish absurdity ! THE ENGLISH STORES ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. In close contact with the old Seraglio is a gloomy- looking pile of buildings, which were at one time converted into stables for the accomodation of the horses belonging to the Harems ; but for many years previous to the Crimean War it remained unoccupied, save by myriads of rats of all sizes and colours. During the war, the Sultan, having no other suitable or unoccupied building, granted a portion of this not very domesticated-looking concern to our Government, as a depot for stores and quarters for those who were in charge of them. For many years previous to the war no one, much less Christians, was allowed to reside so near the old Seraglio ; so that the idea of three or four Englateras, as the Turks called THE ENGLISH STORES ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 39 them, occupying quarters not a stone's throw from the Seraglio, in which were over one hundred of as beautiful and fascinating ladies as eyes could behold, almost sent their eunuchs into hysterics. Lest these Englateras should start on a moon- light expedition, having ladders of ropes as their crafts, revolvers as their rudders, swords as their pilots, and one or more of the ladies in view as the fair prize they wished to capture, the eunuchs, knowing that these witching ladies were as much maids or widows as wives, the more dreaded the arrival of their new neighbours ; and from the first evening they arrived, never did a cat more attentively watch the movements of a mouse than did these black forbidding-looking niggers watch those who were in charge of the stores. From the roof of this habitation (if habitation I may term it, where three foremen, two assistants, and a cooper, resided) access to the Seraglio was not, as most people believe it, impossible. The roof of the Seraglio is almost flat, and covered with a kind of felt or zinc. The building is very large, and in shape not unlike Somerset House. I was surprised on first be- holding several eunuchs sauntering on its roof. 40 THE ENGLISH STORES There is a winding staircase leading from the principal corridor on the ground floor to the Royal Minaret, situate on the eastern side of the roof, and to which the chief eunuch and half-a- dozen subordinates proceed previous to each of the Sultan's visits to the Seraglio ; and from the top of this minaret, which is towering hundreds of feet above the surface of the Bosphorus, the eunuchs very often keep up a cry from sunrise till sunset. They shout to Mahomed, whom they believe to be suspended in the clouds, and constantly looking down upon them ; they exhort him to intercede with Allah their god, first, to bless and protect the Sultan, who is their chief in spiritual as well as temporal matters ; next to exercise his benign influence over the ladies of the Harems, so that they may not be tempted to wander from the path of constancy and devotion, which, according to the doctrine of the Koran, solely belongs to the Sultan. The moment this favourite prayer is heard from the occupiers of the Royal Minaret, it is echoed from one to the other of the hundreds of such re- positories of blasphemy which abound in Con- stantinople, but particularly in Stamboul. ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 41 It is the greatest folly imaginable to think that a Turk will ever be but a Turk, so long as he is taught to look upon all kinds of Christians as his deadliest of enemies. Promises of reform may be held out, and pretended tokens of friendship lavished upon a certain class of Chris- tians ; but there is a motive in these promises and manifestations ; there is no idea of establish- ing them permanently. No Sultan, under pre- sent circumstances, dare, if he felt ever so well inclined, attempt to broach a general reform : he is but the tool of the priests and ladies of the Harems ; and the interest of the one is so bound up in that of the other, that were he ever so well inclined to grant concessions, he cannot, he dare not, carry out his resolve. Yet it is a pity that there is not the least prospect of this people becoming free, or adopting European habits. It is a beautiful land, and, if properly cultivated, could be made to team with nature's richest produce. As my object is merely to show that although a beautiful clime and delightful scenery, a trip to Turkey is not attended with those pleasing incidents which one might expect to 42 THE ENGLISH STORES find stream on his path ; and as newspaper correspondents and occasional flying visitors are I am happy to find, beginning to show the folly of expecting reform, and describing the agricul- tural resources of the country, I need not dwell upon these matters ; although I wish to observe that I would much regret seeing any of our coun- try people take the bait which has been tempt- ingly thrown out for them with regard to their becoming purchasers of Turkish land, and going to permanently reside among the Turks. Before entertaining such an idea, I would advise them to engage quarters in that by-all-account not very comfortable place called " Limbo." A few of my comrades, who are now at the Tower, can testify that, from the moment the English and French armies commenced embarking, until we left with the last of the stores, some three weeks or a month later, neither night nor day were we sure of our lives. From the strong rumour which pre- vailed at Scutari that the Stamboul fanatics were resolved to murder us, we, at any hour of the night or day, had to be prepared to warmly receive them. Whether they got scent of our precaution or not, I cannot say ; but it is certain ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 43 that their manner towards us became very much altered from the moment the last of our soldiers departed. Then how would people fare who might be induced to go to reside in some rural locality ? Some persons' eyes will never become thoroughly opened to the fact that all Mahomedans are bound by the precepts of the Koran to use every possible means in putting an end to Christianity. If fresh proof be needed, we have only to look to Cawnpore, Lucknow, or Syria, where their blood- thirsty deeds towards women and helpless children will by future historians be written in characters which cannot be mistaken as to their treachery and barbarity. I will not embitter my remarks by referring to many brutal and cowardly deeds committed by them even upon those who went to assist in upholding them in their reign of bar- barity and feebleness. During the feast of the Ramaizon and other festive occasions, those in charge of the English stores adjoining the old Seraglio* experienced many sleepless nights, as both priests and laymen kept constantly shouting from the tops of minarets, and eunuchs patrolling by the stores, so that no Englatera might steal a trip to the Seraglio. Yet, residing as they were 44 THE ENGLISH STORES for nearly two years in such close contact with so many pining beauties, it was scarcely possible, although the eunuchs might be ever so watchful, that some of them did not venture upon a moon- light or peep-o'-day cruise. I fancy I hear some of you, particularly the female portion, remark, that if they did not venture they were good-for- nothing. Some of them who left their better halves at home, pretended that they did not care about trying to get to converse with the nymphs of the Seraglio. On returning home they would have been recommended for medals of constancy, only it transpired that it was not so much for the sake of constancy, as fear of the eunuchs, that caused them to pretend to be so very constant. Still it was a good pretence to keep clear from the iron grasp of the eunuchs, while on the quiet they could visit the gay portions of Galata or Para. I will now, with all due respect and solemnity, introduce you to the interior of the domicile in which, on their first arrival, these three foremen resided ; and to add to the solemnity of the occasion permit me to introduce you at dusk of evening, when in that uninhabited locality not a voice or ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 45 a sound was to be heard, except the occasional mew of the owl 5 the yell of a eunuch who wished it to be understood that he was alive and stirring, or the squealing and gnawing of invisible in- habitants to which I will presently call your attention. When arrived at the threshold of this dilapidated-looking ruin, which is seven or eight hundred yards long, and fifty or sixty wide, you perceive in the distance a faint glimmer of light. On inquiry from one of the Armenians who worked in the stores, you are told it is the light of the parlour lamp belonging to the Englateras in charge of the stores. On this announcement you feel anxious to see this pecu- liar parlour, and its no doubt peculiar occupants ; the Armenian acts as your escort, by constantly shouting out " This way, Johnny." They call all English folks Johnny, so that if a lady, by pur- chasing their tomfooleries or otherwise, please them, instead of addressing her as they do the men by saying " Bono Johnny," they cry out " Bono Cookanna Johnny." Well, on your route, as the Armenian tells you of the parlour lamp, after many times getting capsized, battering your shins against heaps of rubbish, and occasionally 46 THE ENGLISH STORES descending to the hips through holes made by rats, you at length arrive at the parlour lamp ; when you look rather suspiciously around you, and begin to fear you have been made the dupe of some conspiring villain, as you look in vain for any emblem of parlour appearance. Pre- sently you perceive three solitary-looking individuals, seated on planks, or lounging on mattresses, their Eastern substitute for sofas, and who, for expedition-sake, I will title Brown, Jones, and Robinson. Each of them is humming to himself, but loud enough to be heard by all, three remarkable, and perhaps, for the occasion, suitable songs. Robinson's selection was " Home, sweet home;" Jones's, " The girl I left behind me;" and Browns, "Meet me by moonlight alone, " with the addition of, " Oh ! bring not thy eunuch, fair lady." After satisfying yourself by looking around this dungeon-like parlour, that it was not only a curious concern, but that its occupants were curious individuals, you introduce yourself to these three solitaires, who until you addressed them were not aware of your presence, as, the place being so very dark, they fancied the approaching footsteps were those of ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 47 the Turks or Armenians who worked in the stores, and were allowed to reside on the premises. On recognising you they receive you only as country- men, when meeting each other in a foreign clime, can do. An extra lamp is lighted, the bottle introduced, and kind inquiries made after all at home, but particularly the fair ones. For a moment you forget the difficulty you experienced in wending your way through the shattered ruins leading to their domicile ; but when the second lamp has thrown more light upon the subject, and when the fear of being inveigled into some dangerous den has vanished from your mind, you inquire how it is they reside in such an awful-looking place, you are informed that when people go to Rome they must do as Rome does, and that in war-time every one must do as best he can ; and that they were allowed a liberal sum, too, if they chose to procure other quarters, but being in charge of the stores, it would not be prudent to leave them at the mercy of knavish Greeks or indolent Turks. " Besides," added Brown, "have you not heard the old song, ' The house to me may lowly be, if I but like the people in it ?"' when Robinson replies/' I admit we pull tolerably smooth together but it would be 48 THE ENGLISH STORES more appropo if you, Brown, had altered the words of that old song to 1 The house to me may lowly be, if I but like the people near it.' " At this announcement you begin to smell a rat, and inquire if there are any lady residents in the locality, when you are told by Robinson that there are one hundred almost next door or at least not a stone's throw from where you stand ; " and," added he, " I wish they were in Jamaica, as I fear they will be the means of getting those into trouble who do not trouble themselves about them. You ask how that can be, when he rather mournfully informs you, that if one attempt to steal a visit to their apartments and be detected, all will be suspected of complicity ; " and," resumed he, with a deep sigh, " all will be punished alike by those eunuchs, w 7 ho have no knowledge of mercy. Then what will our dear wives and little ones do ? I wish the ladies and the Harems were in Hong Kong ; for if they do not get all our necks in the halter, they will cause us to be served like a certain personage at home, which is quite as bad." So saying, poor Robinson heaved a deep sigh, then knocked a large spoon against the bottom of a can, which did as a substitute for a bell. An Armenian who ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 49 acted as footman, valet, and maid- of- all- work , on presenting himself, was, by Kobinson, ordered to get supper ready. Brown, addressing Robinson, suggested that after his long moralising speech, a dose of Old Tom, carefully but plentifully adminis- tered, was very necessary. Robinson, being one of that numerous fraternity who exhort you to do as they tell you, but not to do as they do, willingly agreed to the suggestion ; the glasses or rather the goblets were replenished, and in a short time all hands began to get mellow, toasts and songs were introduced. Among the latter were two sung by Brown, who, being a bit of a poet — although, as you can perceive, they are two old songs — he ingeniously converted them suitable for the occasion. The first was — " 'Twas sad to leave my native land, And the friends I there loved well ; To wander on this Turkish strand. Where friends but seldom dwell. Yet hard as are such ills to bear, And deeply though they smart, Their pangs are light to those who hope To meet one faithful heart. 50 THE ENGLISH STORES Oh, if I meet one gentle eye, To weep if I should grieve ; One bosom to receive the sigh, Which sorrow oft may heave ; One heart the ways of life to cheer, Though rugged they might be, No language can express how dear That heart shall be to me." The next was a parody upon " I wish I 'was with Nancy, " at the conclusion of which, all now labouring under the exhilarating influence of Old Tom, Brown proposed a trip to Para. Eobinson, after muttering something about he hoped people on their return home would not let his dear wife know that he indulged in midnight rambles ; and Jones, after affirming that he knew Sal had more confidence in him than to even surmise, much less believe, he would be guilty of such naughty practices, all started for Para, and no doubt spent a merry night. When you next call upon them at their residence near the old Seraglio, you are gladly surprised on beholding them in snug quarters, and surrounded with every desirable comfort: that is, if in the absence of woman, man's abode can be complete ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 51 with comfort. Brown is absent, no doubt reconnoi- tering the Seraglio walls to ascertain Vhich portion of them with a ladder of ropes could be easiest scaled. Jones is gone to the commissariat de- partment, to hasten the issue of rations. Robin- son is housekeeper, and selecting from his bible that passage which refers to Job's patience. You ask him how it is he selects that peculiar passage, when he informs you that he needeth some such patience to bear against his loneliness, " for," added he, " while in yon habitation of rats Jones mostly always remained with me, but latterly he is as much absent as the cooper, or Brown ; but wait, the next post which leaves for England shall convey to his wife a message that will, on his return home, act as an effective emetic to his insincere conscience." You ask him how it is he makes himself miserable by remaining in- doors when his presence is not required ; he tells you that the last words he uttered to his dear wife, when parting with her, were, that he should ever remain constant. You tell him that such pro- mises are but every-day passwords to deceit. You point out to him the many husbands who tell their wives they are going to their chambers, E 52 THE ENGLISH STORES warehouses, or club-rooms, while at the same time they are impatiently looking at their watches, as at an appointed time they have to be at an appointed place, where they meet by appointment a dear friend, with whom they hasten into a cab, and tell cabby to drive them to some favoured resort. You point out these and many other similar every- day occurrences, when Robinson admits, that for what the eye don't see the heart can't grieve, and, with an air of hypocrisy, pre- tends it would be a hard struggle to wean his thoughts even for a moment from her at home. To one who knew nothing of his movements, these assurances would bear the semblance of sincerity, but Robinson, as well as many others who fancy that because they bear the name of being prudent and religiously inclined, that name will act as a shield against their fair- and- easy deeds being made visible, was in this instance disagreeably mistaken. For Brown, surmising there must be some other attraction to induce him to so constantly remain at home, besides dwelling on Job's patience, was resolved to find out what this attraction was. To achieve this object, he had to resort to the not-unfrequent ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 53 mode of secret-finding, that of concealing himself where, although he could not be perceived, he was in a favourable reconnoitering position. He was not long in his hiding-place ere he perceived Eobinson proceed to a balcony at the end of his quarters, facing the Eoyal Mint, draw from his pocket a nicely-embroidered handkerchief, wave it three times. Presently a small back window in the upper story of a large building not far from the Eoyal Mint, opened, and a beautiful woman, after some difficulty, contrived to get through this window, and rested with all the grace of an Eastern queen on some old palisadings adjoining the roof. From this elevated though awkward position, with becks, nods, and the other countless modes of conveying invisible love-messages, she continued to return Eobin- son's mysterious signals until dusk of evening prevented their being able to longer recognise each other. A few evenings afterwards Brown had an opportunity of seeing this lady, and in describing her, he said " she was young, she was beautiful; her garments and hair were ar- ranged with that nicety of taste which showed that she not only belonged to a high grade of e 2 54 THE ENGLISH STORES society, but that she must be aware of her charms." " Her eyes," continued he, " were of that heavenly blue which, with their gaze of azure loveliness, would transfix one to their spell. Her hair was of a golden hue, and hung in bright curls on her shoulders. Her face, oh ! how lovely ; her smile, how bewitching ! although not tall, she was slightly and beautifully made. She wore a train of black silk; her white Zouave jacket was open in front, and displayed the most snow-like bosom ; the sleeves were laced with gold cord, and trimmed with small rosettes; the jacket was braided with white silk and gold braid. Altogether she looked superb. " And," added he, " it is seldom one sees a form and features so faultless as hers," so much so that scarcely anyone could find fault with Robinson for so admirably bowing and scraping to this fair Armenian, who was free from Harem control on a visit at her uncle's, and in the old man's absence honoured Robinson with bowing compliments. I will, for the present, leave them to indulge in their twilight manoeuvres, and again call your attention to that portion of the old ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO* 55 building adjoining the Seraglio, where, on their first arrival, Browu, Jones, and Robinson, during the first week, never enjoyed one hour's sleep, as the moment they experienced a little ease from the incessant and provoking bites of musquitoes, and when their weary eyes were about to close, not one or two, but a company of rats, would march into their apartments, and, without the least concern, take up their position on the foot or other portions of their beds. Not liking the liberty these uninvited visitors took, they received them with the point of the bayonet ; but when they became so weary from the want of repose that they could no longer keep watch, they placed, as sentry, one of the Turks who worked in the stores ; and whether it was from the close friendship which existed between them the fellow did not oppose their entrance, con- sequently, on Brown awaking one morning at break of day and looking around him, he per- ceived two or three dozen of them lying quite cozy on the foot and other portions of his bed. He was about to administer to them a dose with the point of his sword, when Jones shouted out " Oh murder, I am eat — the rats have eaten me." His 56 THE ENGLISH STORES voice was the signal for their departure, and never did an enemy retreat in more perfect order or with less concern as to their danger than did these monsters of the dark recesses of the old Seraglio. Some of them seemed as though they were bald with age, others were black, and not a few white. It may be said, why not, by stopping their places of ingress, prevent the possibility of their appear- ance. This is all very well, but is easier said than done. How could it be managed, as there were large vaults under their sleeping apart- ments ; and thin decayed boards were the only bearers between them and a seeming fathomless recess below? The place was several times boarded, and all seemed serene in the day, but when night approached these monsters set to work, and never did a company of Sappers more speedily demolish an enemy's fort than did they, with their huge teeth, shatter the boards to atoms ; and what is strange and worthy of remark, never was there an instance in which they were known to injure any of the men. When Jones fancied they had ate him, they were harmlessly lying on his bed ; but, awaking suddenly, with the sleep in his eyes, and seeing ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. 57 them around him, I presume he really did imagine they had done him some bodily harm. If some of the old ones could speak, they might tell dark and horrifying tales, as in former times there was a subterranean passage from the chief corridor of the old Seraglio, leading through these vaults to the banks of the Bos- phorus, and where many a lovely woman on her route to her watery grave, in half- stifled accents, sued for mercy, but the butcher eunuchs, in whose iron grasp she was closely held, knew not mercy nor pity ; they on some pretence, repre- sented to the Sultan that she was faithless. They required their annual victim for the fishes of the Bosphorus, and it mattered little to the wretches whether she was innocent or otherwise. They led her on through this dark, underground hellish-looking route, and it may be that the poor thing, through the persecution she ex- perienced ere the sentence of death was pro- nounced against her, being faint, and so much dreaded being placed in the executioner's sack and thrown into the Bosphorus, her heart broke, and in the midst of that hell-like passage where resistance was useless, and where no fond friend 58 THE ENGLISH STORES ADJOINING THE SERAGLIO. could bid her a kind adieu, she expired. The butcher eunuchs being deprived of the gratifica- tion of extinguishing the vital spark, like a tiger which is disappointed in devouring its intended prey, and has reluctantly to return to its offal, these black blood-hounds carried her corpse to a portion of the vaults which an old Greek pointed out to me as being called " the butcher's corner, " where, after dividing between them her clothes and jewellery, left her corpse to decay to a skeleton, or be devoured by the predecessors of those vermin which so annoyed Brown and his companions. THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS- OF- ALL- WORK. At no place in the world have such dark and foul deeds been committed as at the old Seraglio, Stamboul. There, at the will of a tyrant Sultan, the young, the beautiful and confiding woman was condemned to die, merely because it might suit the purpose of designing eunuchs to repre- sent to his Majesty that she was faithless. The women of the Harems must not, at the peril of their lives, by nod or otherwise, presume to recognise any of the masculine gender, eunuchs excepted. I am puzzled to know how these wretched drones are entitled to the appellation of masculine ; but this I do know, that the coun- try which encourages such brutalising pro- ceedings as converts them into nothingness, and 60 THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF- ALL-WORK. the laws which sanction such inhuman treatment, require re-modelling, and shoiild stimulate Euro- pean nations to unite in having an end put to such brutish practices. Were these eunuchs beasts of the forest, and the Sultan lord of the manor, he and his clique of profligate Pashas could and might do as they pleased with them, but when they are of our own species and possessed of the same organs of sensitiveness and intelligence, why permit any profligate, though he were twenty times a Sultan, to convert them into a lower grade than are millions of brute animals? We advocate, and justly, the abolition of slavery—why not protest against the continuance of this unnatural practice, which is a desecration of and disgrace to humanity ? Although scarcely able to drag one leg past the other, a Sultan must have from five to seven hundred wives or concubines, and forsooth must have as many eunuchs to wait upon and take care of them, as no other grade will be trusted. To prevent the possibility of familiarity existing between them and any other lord of the creation, he places over them a guard of eunuchs, and presents to each lady on her admission into the THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF-ALL- WORK. 61 Seraglio a eunuch, who has to act as lady's-maid and maid-of-all-work. It is truly sorrowful to behold in the nineteenth century such desecra- tion of humanity allowed to exist, particularly when it tends to strengthen the stronghold of profligate tendencies. And what is most to be regretted is, that such a state of things should continue to be so obstinately upheld in that very land bordering upon where our Saviour and his disciples, by their examples and exhortations, sowed the seeds of righteousness. Those who are anxious to become true followers of Him who from Calvary's cross proclaimed their salva- tion, could scarcely render a more pleasing or suitable tribute to His memory than by their efforts to restore to that land of, I may say, His adoption, the laws of justice, morality, and righteousness. I could at this moment dwell considerably upon the religious mummeries and fanatical bigotry of this degraded people, but as I like every one to be allowed to follow whatever kind of religion he chooses, I will not in- terfere with the dogmas of Mahomedanism. Their guys of priests may mount minarets as often as they choose, and shout like donkeys as long as 62 THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF- ALL- WORK. they please, their peculiar belief has nothing to do with me ; but when they add to their blasphemy, mummeries and fanaticism by con- verting men into unfeeling beasts, so that they may act as sentinels over the ramparts of sensuality — then, I say, away with such a race ! put an end to such a reign, and a bright dawn will open over the future of Turkey. These wretched drones of eunuchs are dressed like black women, and, except when very close and by particularly observing the distinction of their turbans, you could not distinguish them from female niggers. Not being possessed of sympathetic feeling themselves, it could scarcely be expected they would manifest any towards others ; consequently with their sanction it is impossible to get to converse with any of their ladies, except under extraordinary circumstan- ces, such as occurred during the Crimean War, when a wing of the English stores was erected upon a portion of the pleasure ground which previous to the war was their favourite place for promenading; for a short time after Brown, Jones, and Robinson's arrival, they discontinued walking in that favourite resort. I presume THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF- ALL- WORK. 63 their walks were discontinued through represen- tations made by the eunuchs that it was not prudent or safe to permit so many pining beauties in their walks to exhibit to three lonely Englateras their unrivalled charms. Although their faces when out of doors have, as the custom of the country requires, to be covered with a thick white handkerchief, still the grace- fulness of their unrivalled beauty was visible in their every movement. In a short time after Brown, Jones, and Eobinson's arrival, they again renewed their walks, which, I need scarcely remind you, much pleased these three indivi- duals, who politely welcomed them by the raising of their hats or other tokens of respectful attention. An Armenian who worked in the stores, and spoke tolerably good English, acted as a kind of interpreter between them and Brown, as his comrades, with the exception of Woolwich Harry, were almost afraid to look, the name of being found to have anything to say to a Sultan's wife sounded so dreadful; and the penalties attached to it, when applied to a Turk, Greek, or Armenian, being instant death, by being either placed in a sack and thrown into 64 THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF-ALL-WORK. the Bosphorus, or have a Jack Ketch's knot adjusted round his neck. The eunuchs, upon Brown, Jones, and Robinson's arrival, through an interpreter informed them that be he Eng- lish, French, or otherwise, if found to trespass upon the precincts of the Harem, or endeavour to carry on any clandestine correspondence with its inmates, his punishment would be the same as though he were a native of Turkey. This announcement struck terror into Jones and Robinson, who always took particular care not to trespass ; but Brown, being one of those romantic devil-may-care kind of individuals, was resolved to know a little, if not of the ladies, at least of the Seraglios ; and so the eunuchs pro- clamation was to him a dead letter. From the moment the ladies first appeared, he made up his mind to, if possible, become acquainted with one of them, and that one is she to whom I have previously referred, and to whose prison apart- ments he, without a doubt, contrived to find his way. The eunuchs were not aware that the little Armenian who acted as Brown's interpreter understood the English language, so that when conveying to Belinda the assurance of Brown's THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-0F- ALL- WORK, 65 sympathy for her lonely state, and his deter- mination if possible, with her consent, to release her from the lonely solicitude of the Seraglio, the eunuchs fancied he was merely pointing out to the ladies some peculiar piece of workmanship. But things were destined to continue in this quiet manner only for a short time. From the fact of Brown enjoying single blessedness, or disagreeableness, whichever you may term it, as well as residing in that lonely place where no fair one was ever to be seen except the nymphs of the Harems, where visits were, like angels, few and far between, it was scarcely any wonder that his attention should be directed to how he could best contrive to procure Belinda's release. One evening when about to return to the Seraglio, she secretly instructed the Arme- nian to inform Brown that she was much pleased with his gallantry and attention, and would be more so if he could learn a little of her language, so that if an opportunity occurred they would not require the aid of an interpreter; " but," added she, " inform him, likewise, that he must be most cautious and prudent, as, if the 66 THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS -OF- ALL-WORK. eunuchs once suspect I have given him the least encouragement, he will never see me more, nor can any one except the executioner-eunuch relate the tale of my departure. He knows my window ; inform him that at dusk of eve he, as usual, will see a light, which is to signify that all is well. Convey to him the assurance of my kindest regards. As regards you, Artinia, if you remain faithful, it will be in my power, whether an inmate of the Seraglio or otherwise, to reward your fidelity ; and as a token of my sincerity, accept this purse " — which on opening the Armenian found it was his interest to remain faithful to so liberal an employer. On the Armenian informing Brown that Belinda was desirous he should learn a little of her language, never was mortal more anxious to obtain his cherished hope than was he to be- come master of a few sentences of that difficult language ; he longed to be able to convey to her from his own lips how happy he would be if he could but be the medium of releasing her from that purgatorial place ; and when released, how quick and pleasant the time would pass in her society. These few words seem so simple, yet THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF- ALL-WORK. 67 how difficult to learn ! but where there is a will there is mostly a way, and he at that time being one of those who do not allow obstacles to so accumulate on his path as to mar his progress, speedily learned a trifle of her language. But as regards caution and prudence, he possessed and practised much more of these qualities ere she commanded him. For a few days he was very reserved, and passed her windows for all the world like a person who entertains a regard for one who is of a superior grade of society, but whom he would not on any account wish to know that his presumption soared so high as to dare revere her. A few days were all that Brown could keep from squinting as usual at Belinda's window, and for the one time at dusk of eve he previously looked towards a certain westerly window for the signal that all was well, he after- wards looked ten times, until by his imprudence he nearly verified the saying that too much cooking spoils the dish. Yet how could he refrain from throwing a wistful eye towards that hateful Seraglio where, under the strict surveil- lance of unfeeling eunuchs, was one for whose releasement he sighed? — -not for the sake of F 68 THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF-ALL-WORK. procuring her liberty, or of having himself gazetted as a hero of the Harems, and of then letting her fri endlessly drift on the cold world of surmises, but wi th the intention of never causing her to regret the confidence she placed in his sincerity. From the courtesy paid him by this beautiful and accomplished lady in preference to her own countrymen, or indeed all others, it is not surprising that his inclination should lead him to resort to even extreme measures to try to secure her liberty. Yes, liberty it may be truly termed, as it is folly to imagine that young and beautiful ladies, who are never permitted to leave the Harem except under the escort and control of suspicious eunuchs, enjoy the remotest privilege of freedom. They strongly remind one of birds in a cage which, always pining for liberty, would the first opportunity bid good-bye to their keepers. Being aware of this fact, as well as receiving tokens of attachment, encouraged Brown to look with confidence on the success of a second visit. All you who have had any experience in love matters, are aware how soon these pretty yet unassuming nymphs would, by courtesy or THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF-ALL-WORK. 69 otherwise, steal one's affections, particularly when circumstanced as Brown was, who, on his return in the evening to his dreary quarters, had no pleasing object to divert his thoughts from the vision of Belinda, consequently her angelic appearance was ever foremost in his memory ; so much so, that one night in his dream he fancied he beheld as usual a dimly-burning light in a well-known window, and that with the aid of a ladder of ropes he contrived to get to the roof of the Seraglio, from whence he quickly arrived at this window, and was gladly recom- pensed for his adventure by beholding through the glass the object of his visit, in the person of her who conjured him to be prudent and cautious. Whether Morpheus, when leading Brown under his midnight sway, deemed it prudent, I cannot say ; at all events, through his influ- ence, he arrived unperceived at his lady loves window, when his ear caught the sound of delicious music, accompanied with a sweet yet mournful voice. A few moments sufficed to convince him that she was playing the piano, and singing that applicable song — f 2 70 .THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF? ALL-WOHK. "Oh solitude ! where are the charms That sages have seen in thy face ? Better dwell in the midst of alarms. Than reign in this horrible place," On finishing the last sentence, she turned towards the window, and on suddenly perceiving the form of a man, uttered a faint shriek, which might have resulted in serious consequences had her eunuch, w T ho slept in an adjoining room,' heard her. On recovering from her momentary surprise, she again looked towards the window, and this time recognised the adventurer. What a difference ! Her face brightened up with that smile of confidence and pleasure which can only proceed from the bosom of those who for a long time have had no confiding; friend to whom they dare utter the sentiments of their mind. I believe there are many of us who at times would almost bestow a world of treasure, could we but find one confiding friend in wdiose ear we might whisper the long-pent-up sentiments of our joys or troubles. There are but few w r ho, at some stage of life, have not experienced the want of such a friend. We may have relations, or mush- room friends, who in sunshine will bask with us THE EUNUCHS AS MAIDS-OF-ALL-WCKK. 71 in the delights of our sunny pleasures, and who by their smiles and soft words would have us believe they were our very clear friends ; but the moment cold winter approaches, and our gardens — pockets, I mean — become deprived of their rich fragrant verdure called golden guineas, that moment will these sunshine friends disappear. But that is not all. Although their tongues be silent in our praise, their ears become more open to our faults ; that loucl-tongued trumpeter called Slander or Backbiter can never sound his notes, but these once very dear friends will earnestly list to try if they can hear our names among the proclaimed ; and if they should hap- pen to appear among those on that unenviable list, will these dear friends by a kind effort try to erase them ? Certainly not ; that would not be religiously following the everyday gospel of throwing more water on a drowned rat. If we, when enjoying our liberty and having an opportunity of selecting, from numerous circles of relatives or acquaintances, one confiding soul, cannot at times succeed in selecting, or rather trusting even that one, how must it be with those ladies who are confined in the dreary pre- 72 THE EUNUCHS AS MA1DS-0F- ALL- WORK. cincts of the Harems, having no one to confide in or converse with but their hateful eunuchs ! But to return to Brown's dream, I dare say many of you will say " Oh, yes, a dream ! we know better, it happened in reality." Well, I am inclined to be of the same way of thinking. All of us know that many things which are seen in dreams often appear in reality ; still as no Christian, Lord Byron excepted, is supposed to have stolen a successful visit to the old Seraglio, I must only call your attention to his visit in the shape of a dream. Of course, you can exer- cise your own opinion as to whether it occurred in reality or not. BROWN'S DREAM, AND BELINDAS CONVERSATION AND ATTEMPT TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. When recovered from the temporary fright experienced by Browns sudden and unexpected appearance, Belinda opened the window, and invited him into her sitting apartment. For a moment his eyes became dazzled with the bril- liant prospect and beauty of her apartments. One might read about fairy dells, enchanted halls or ancient castles, and dwell with delight on the description given of the beauty of their exterior and interiors ; but in Belinda's one's eyes might feast upon the loveliest as well as rarest of luxuries. Every particle of the costliest of household requisites which one could name was at her disposal, but not in so ship-shape a position as our tidy housewives at home would have superintended the arranging of them ; yet 74 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt considering that eunuchs were thehousemaidswho had the assorting of them, they were not so badly classified. When Brown entered, Belinda re- quested him to be seated while she retired to her dressing room. On her return he scarcely recognised her as the same individual who a few moments previous was attired in her ordinary Turkish costume. She now wore a magnifi- cent train of green silk, white Zouave jacket with large sleeves, which were trimmed with green ribbon and bound with golden cord. Her rich auburn hair was beautifully plaited, and encircled in a magnificent wreath of diamonds and pearls. She wore rings and bracelets of the most splendid and costly description. If she, looking charming in her ordinary costume of loose wrapper, loose slippers, and blindman's-buff head-dress, how must she have appeared in this superb costume? She perceived that Brown entertained a doubt as to her identity, and immediately removed that doubt by assuring him she was the same Belinda who a few moments previous appeared in her dishabille; •-and," added she, "as an opportunity now offers which may never again occur, I will, if you allow me to be your guide, conduct you to TO ESCAPE FROM THE SEiiAGLXO. what is termed 'Venus's Bower' or the £ Valley of Pleasure/ where by torch-light the Sultan and all the other ladies and their eunuchs are assembled to do honor to the new b/ide who was this morning admitted into the Seraglio. I would have to be present, but something told me you might either, asleep or awake, start upon a voyage of discovery, so I feigned illness by which I was excused from attending. Had I not possessed a little of woman's forethought I would now have to be assembled with the others in the Bower of Pleasure, then on your arrival here would you not be done brown ? I am now in marching order ; we must stealthily pass through the halls, verandas, and corridors until we arrive at a suitable place from whence you unperceived may witness the proceedings ; so that on your return to England you can truthfully certify that you beheld one of the most beautiful and romantic yet melancholy, of Eastern scenes. But stop* we cannot be too cautious. I will put on my loose wrapper and face handkerchief to conceal these festive garments; and if you mind not, I should in appearance like to convert you into a eunuch." Brown said he would take particular care it 76 BROWUta DREAM ; AND BELINDA'S ATTEMPT should be in appearance only ; and added, that if a change of apparel was necessary for their safety, he had no objection to adopt it; on which Belinda hastened to her eunuch's wardrobe, where there was an abundant supply, such as they were, of half-feminine clothing, and her eunuch being of herculean dimensions Brown had no difficulty in drawing- some of them over his own. The next part of the performance was to blacken his face, and nut on a fez. This complete, Belinda could not on looking at him refrain from heartily laughing, and remarking, that if he was not "done Broivn" he was " Broivn Mack" When satisfied that, should they be perceived, their disguise in dress would be the means of not raising an alarm, Belinda led the way, and in a short time they securely arrived at their place of concealment in close contact with the Bower of Pleasure. This pleasure bower is situate in the centre of Cupid's Garden, to which, as I before mentioned, on the admission of each lady into the Seraglio, all the inmates are summoned to attend by torch-light in their richest and gayest attire. If the night be fine, which in that Eastern clime at midsummer it mostly always is, the eunuchs TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. as well as acting as waiters or waitresses, have to fill the office of fan-bearers and mistresses of the robes. The bower is nicely decked with flags, evergreens, and flowers. It is covered with the richest carpeting, and placed in suitable posi- tions on each side are sofas, sideboards, chairs, and tables. On the latter were placed richly wrought moulds and dishes containing ices, jellies, grapes, and all delicacies of the season. At the eastern end of the bower there was a throne, over which waved the Mahomedan coat of arms : close to the throne v/ere two state chairs. The throne previous to the ceremony is occu- pied by the Sultan, the two state chairs by the bride-elect and chief eunuch. At the conclusion of the ceremony the Sultan places the new bride upon the throne, when the lady minstrels pour forth the richest of lays in her praise, and the eunuchs re-deck the place with bouquets culled from the choicest of flowers. The ladies next commence singing and dancing, all of them being proficient in these arts, as well as skilled musicians. From the mingling of so many voices, the soft notes of delicious music which wafted delightfully on the still easterly breeze ; 78 BROWN'S DREAM, AND BELINDA'S ATTEMPT with beholding the rich profiles of grapes, figs, peaches, and numerous other sweets, as well as countless beds of geraniums, jessamines, and roses which grew in rich luxuriance around the bower, one would fancy himself in some fairy dale, where he beheld every beautiful object which the power of imagination could picture to his fancy. To convey but a very faint idea of this enchanting scene, you must fancy you behold beautiful verandas, among which are numerous silvery fountains whose murmuring rills silently loiter through the vale, and are surrounded by beds of the choicest floral products imaginable, whose rich perfumes breathed their delicious fragrance on the still air around. There were slender trees, the branches of which seemed, as the saying is, to reach half-way to the clouds, and which in the day are thronged with every species of the feathered tribe, whose mingled warblings would plunge the most thoughtless into a reverie of delightful suspense. The moon's silvery beams shone brightly on the fonts, the flowers, and vines ; and by the glimmer of the torches the costly jewels so flashed from the superb robes of the ladies as to dazzle the eye. TO ESCAPE FllOM THE SERAGLIO. 79 The costumes of the ladies were varied, beautiful, and skilfully assorted. It must be borne in mind that only on festive occasions like the present are they allowed to don this rich European attire. Some wore trains of black silk, others black silk velvet, with Zouave jackets, some of which had very large, others very small sleeves, which were suitably trimmed and bound with golden cord; others wore a body and train of crimson and gold; some wore purple, lilac, and crimson bodices, with trains of emerald green; a few wore snow-white bodices and green trains. They appeared to be perfect models of innocence- — indeed, it would be difficult to discern the slightest distinction between either the elegance of their persons or careful arrangement of their cos- tumes; considering that drones of eunuchs attended to their toilet departments, I am surprised that they could appear in such per- fection. The Circassians, with their lovely eyes of heavenly blue, appeared beautiful in the extreme; and although, as I before mentioned, it would be almost impossible to detect the least distinction between beauty or elegance of any of them, still there was one who seemed to command 80 BBOWS's DREAM. AND BELINDA'S ATTEMPT particular notice from all others, and marked attention from the Sultan. This was the bride elect, on whose account they had assembled to do honour, and like all other performances through life, these ceremonies are inaugurated with more variety of gaiety and pleasure according to the previous station in society of the object of the night's entertainment. The present bride elect was the scion of a noble house — that is if riches and power constitute nobility : except these not- to-be-despised appendages, I never heard of any other claim a Turk can have to aspire to that venerable title. This lady being of a superior grade of society, on her admission had administered to her extra doses of adulation. She was tall, not very slight yet beautifully made, and seemed to be conscious she was the object of his Majesty's admiration, as she occasionally gazed upon him with that force of confidence which only a certainty that she for the time being ranked foremost in his affections could warrant her in doing. Although the music which echoed through the bower, and wafted delightfully on the calm midnight breeze, when mingled with the sweet voices of the ladies who sang many of their TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO, 81 favourite songs, such as " Oh Cupid, come! thine arrows lend, until a Sultan's heart I bend," or Oh, Mahomed! canst thou deign to look, upon thy daughters now forsook?" (the former was sung by the bride elect, and the latter by one of the others, who I presume wore horns)— although the varied amusements and charms of the music might rivet attention to their delights, still the Sultan seemed as though his mind was wandering either back to bygone times, when the glow of youth upon his cheeks might enable him to more fully appreciate these gaities ; or his thoughts were engaged with the idea of how he might easiest get rid of the reigning Sultana, whose presence was beginning to become more and more disagreeable as she stood in the way of a more admired object for whose honour they were then assembled in that fairy floral bower, and for whose gratification the lady minstrels were singing and playing their favorite lays. Through the attractive charms of this enchant- ing scene, Brown became so spell-bound that when Belinda aroused him from his reverie of attention, he fancied he had been a spectator but a few seconds, while he had been as many hours. 82 brow's dream, and Belinda's attempt Although clanger surrounded them every instant they remained, and although Belinda used every persuasive power to try to prevail upon him to depart, it was only when the morning beams began to appear, he reluctantly turned his back upon that never-to-be-forgotten sceije. Addressing him, Belinda said, " Johnny, look yonder. See yon moon begins to disappear ; the eunuchs will shortly retire from the Bower of Pleasure, so that if not quick I fear they will prevent the possibility of our escape, as, on returning to their apartments, it being break of day they will not retire for repose. They are so suspicious of you Englateras, their first duty will be to look around your stores, to see that none of you, but you in particular, are scaling the w 7 alls. Let us haste to my apartments ; it will not take me long to get in a runaway state. We then by a staircase can ascend to the western roof of the Seraglio, and from thence with your ladder of ropes to the roof of your stores ; and then wont I joyfully say farewell to this detest- able place !" They hastened to her apartments, and after making fast the door of the room in which her eunuch was closely wrapped in slum- TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 83 ber, they ascended the roof of the Seraglio, and were quickly wending their way in the direction of the English stores, when they heard the tiger-like yell of a eunuch, which caused Be- linda to tremble ; and to say that Brown did not experience a disagreeable sensation would be assuming the artificial heroism of bravado. He did fear, but not for himself, as he well knew that, armed as he was with a sword, and two six-barrel revolvers which never missed fire, these black spaniels could not injure him. But what was to become of Belinda if perceived by these monsters? To either attempt to escape with him to his quarters or return to her apart- ments would alike be attended with fatal consequences. What was to be done ? A thought struck him : she must commence screaming, and by calling for aid signify that he stealthily entered her apartments, and under the penalty of death forcibly compelled her quietly to accompany him ; this was the only hope by which the eunuchs might take a favourable view of the matter in Belinda's behalf. And when once away from the precincts of the Seraglio, let the Sultan dare punish him ! He, no doubt, G 84 brown's bream,, and Belinda's attempt upon the chief eunuch's representation might be tried by court-martial, as civilians, as well as soldiers, are in war time under martial law. Yes, he might be arraigned for striving to se- cure the liberty of that caged bird ; but, as the jury would be composed of officers, whom every one knows are themselves represented to be fond of the ladies ; and as the presidential chair would most probably be filled by the military storekeeper, in whose confidence he had a tolerable hold, it would not go very hard with him. They might, as a matter of form, find him guilty of unlawfully attempting to uncage that musical linnet ; but being foiled in his ob- ject, which many of them no doubt would inwardly regret, and being ignorant of the laws of the country as well as the severe penalties to be inflicted for such misdemeanors, they most probably would come to the conclusion that by the storekeeper confining him to the dreary precincts of the store department at Seraglio Point for one week would be sufficient punish- ment. While contemplating on the prospect of a court martial, and its results, Belinda roused TO ESCAPE EROM THE SERAGLIO. 85 him from his reverie, and informed him that they were still unperceived ; that the dread voices they heard were those of the eunuchs returning from the Bower of Pleasure, and that as this was the day for the pilgrim to depart for Mecca, all the inmates would be stirring about earlier than usual; " then, " added she, " I must confess, madness alone would induce me to try to escape to your quarters. You see the morn- ing beams begin to illume yon dark wing of the Seraglio where the night sentinels resort for shelter, that were we to attempt to pass that quarter they could not avoid seeing us : but attired as you are in eunuch's costume, and, thanks to that superior paint, with as black a physiognomy as any of them, they will not notice you. Let me see, how can we contrive to have that wretch's garments returned ? If he misses them, suspicion will immediately be awakened in his fiendish bosom. " Brown, with that kind of smile which persons wear when only half pleased with what they last heard, assured her that he had no idea of keeping possession of her eunuch's feminine garments longer than they acted as a shield g 2 86 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt against detection ; " and now, " continued he, ff that you are about to return to your eunuch protector, I no longer need them. It was for your safety I reluctantly consented to draw them over my own. " So saying, he quickly stepped out of the eunuch's extensions, and carefully folding them, asked Belinda if under such ex- traordinary circumstances, she would consent to act as portress and again return them so as to prevent suspicion. Belinda, with downcast eyes replied, " Yes Johnny, I will become portress ; but you have grieved me much, very much indeed, by the hasty manner in which you parted with them. How could you imagine I would moot such a proceeding only for the safety of both ? Yes, Johnny, you very hastily, and I fear angrily, although I must admit politely, requested of me to return them. If angry, you have had no cause ; if only a little passionately, I can readily forgive you, as from what I have been informed, you Englateras cannot so patiently brook dis- appointment as other people. Yet what was to be done ? If you can show me the least prospect of escaping unperceived, I will proceed with TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 87 you ; but it would be impossible to pass yon wing of the roof without being detected ; then look at the consequences not only to me but to you. If the eunuchs once get hold of you, and you to resist them, which no doubt, Engla- tera like, you would — with numbers they would overcome you, and without judge or jury commit you to the bottom of the Bosphorus. Yet I feel at this moment as though all hope of ever escaping was receding from my view. A something tells me that after now parting, I will never converse with, nay, even see you more. If they have per- ceived us, on returning to my apartments I know my fate, and am prepared for it ; but when you are passing yon portion of the roof adjoining the Minaret, you may be pounced upon and brutally murdered. A something tells me such will be the case. If this fearful surmise would but present itself in the shape of reality, I then would know how to act, and that would be to stand by your side until both were slain, or till both were free. " At this moment another loud shout startled Belinda. After bestowing a moment's attention towards the direction from which this shout 88 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt proceeded, she said, " Johnny, we have not as yet been perceived ; it is impossible for them to have seen us from whence that shout has pro- ceeded. But as there is no time to be lost, the sooner I hasten to my apartments the better, and unlock my eunuch's door, which you know it was necessary for us to make fast before we started. Should he awaken, and find his door locked, he would instantly suspect that some of you Englateras had stolen a trip ; and by an alarm bell, the wire of which communicates with each eunuch's sleeping department, he could in a moment summon all of them to his assistance. I once tried the experiment, and never shall forget the fright I experienced through my rash deed. When only a few weeks an inmate of this loathsome place, and unexperienced in Harem rules and usages, I, girl like, in the height of my simplicity, when I fancied my eunuch was asleep, opened my door, entered the dormitory, touched the spring of this wire ; then, with the swiftness of a bird, hastened to my bedchamber, locked the door and as usual took out the key. We must always take out the keys after locking our doors, so that the chief eunuch or our own TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 89 attendant, who have master keys, may come at any hour of the night or day to see that we have not taken in any single men lodgers. Well, I hastened into my bed-chamber, jumped into bed, and had scarcely time to assume a sleeping posture, ere my eunuch stealthily placed his key in the lock, and as stealthily unlocked my door: then, with a dark lantern in one hand and a dagger in the other, approached my bed. I pretended to be fast asleep ; not even did I breathe, but .1 could feel cold drops of perspiration run over me. When convinced that I had not let any of my sleeping apartments, he entered my dressing and sitting rooms, and after satisfying himself that there was no one concealed in any hiding place, he quitely depart- ed, and hastened to the signal tower, where as soon as the alarm-bell rings, after each eunuch searchinghisladies apartments,as mine had done, if unsuccessful in finding any intruder, they all meet and hold a consultation as to the cause of alarm, and plan of action to be adopted. On this occasion, after consultation for a long time, and each eunuch certifying that no dog of a Christian had by his presence sullied his lady's apartments, 90 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt they came to the conclusion that the ringing of the bellmust have been a warning from Mahomed; and that in consequence of three Englateras residing so close to the Seraglio, it behoved them to be double diligent, or you would most probably try to enter, as at the time of this occurrence you had just come to reside among us. They firmly believed that Mahomed caused the alarm-bell to proclaim that while enemies were so close to their stronghold they should be always on the ramparts of caution, ready to warmly receive you should you dare enter the precincts of their dear Seraglio. But to return to my eunuch's visit. Oh, Johnny! I cannot describe to you the frightful sensation I experienced when I beheld him so demon-like advance towards me. He moved on the tip of his toes ; through his horrid black face gleamed the white of his eyes, which, like the waves of a troubled ocean when a tempest disturbs it, kept rolling in such a wild manner that I almost became faint, and at one time was about to scream for help. But of what avail would be my screaming? If he saw me touch the spring of the alarm-bell, he was about to adminis- ter chastisement in the shape of death. If he did TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 91 not see me, he was merely searching my room on the supposition that some of you were concealed in it. I calmly and in feverish excitement awaited the result, and never did mortal more gladly hail the arrival of an esteemed friend after a long absence, than did I hail his departure. " I must no longer detain you, although I feel as if I would like to relate to you many incidents connected with this horrid place ; so that on your return to England you might, when an opportunity presented, let the English people, but particularly the lady portion, know that, when young and inexperienced, we are, either through the brilliant prospects pictured to our imagination, or by the command of selfish, in- human parents, who fancy by having daughters in the Sultan's Seraglios, they will gain his Majesty's favour, — we are, by either of these causes, induced or compelled to participate in the would-be joys of the Harems. But words cannot convey the amount of misery we experi- ence. It is true we are abundantly supplied with what money can commaild ; but what of that? We are deprived of what alone makes 92 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt life a treasure, namely, one confiding friend, who could return our affection. Of what use are all the brilliant appendages of a court or queenly life, if they only tend to make one unhappy ? Is not the little bird which can perch from tree to tree of the forest, and exist on the forest's hum- ble fare, more content and happy than the gold- finch or linnet which is confined in its golden cage and supplied from drawing-room luxuries ? Oh, yes ; that cock sparrow or simple robin red- breast, when soaring on the pinions of freedom, through its native shrubberies or o'er its moun- tain tops, is far more happy than the caged linnet. And why ? because wherever it goes, its mate follows and shares in its dangers and dis- tresses as well as its sweets; it feels that it has one to think of and care for it; that it is not alone in the world, or left, as it were, like a flower in an uncultivated vale, where, from cold- ness and neglect, thorns and poisonous weeds will destroy its fragrance. Yet, how many young persons, through the solicitations of friends or acquaintances, bind themselves to a life of misery ! Yes, Johnny, there are thousands who, for ambition's sake, ally themselves for life to TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 93 those who treat them similar to the canary in the drawing-room cage. They may supply them with golden baubles, but cannot, will not, be- queath them what is alone worth possessing — the constancy of their hearts. M I regret not having an opportunity of show- ing you the chamber of horrors, in which are nu- merous skeletons of ladies who were represented to the Sultan as being faithless, and consequently was confined in the dark dungeons of that horrid place, until, from starvation or other cruel treat- ment, they bade adieu to this world. I must no longer detain you, the morning begins to dawn ; in a short time the sun will so brilliantly shine and its heavenly rays so illumine the dark recesses of this gloomy place, that the chilly eu- nuchs will hasten to yon balcony to bask under its inviting rays. If once there, you could not possibly get to your quarters without being per- ceived. Let us, until a more favourable opportu- nity occurs, leave no room for surmise. But this heart of mine seems to suggest that no such opportunity will ever occur. Yet, I know if an opportunity presents, you are brave and generous enough to try to get me from this loathsome 94 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt place. But if you cannot, if fate hath decreed that I am destined to pass my days in this dun- geon-like abode, will you as a favour to her who would be only too glad to grant you any reason- able request, on your return to England — " At this instant a mingling of many voices and dis- tinct footsteps signified that the eunuchs, who seemed to have mustered in considerable force, were not so far away as Belinda believed them to be ; and there being a staircase in the centre of the Seraglio leading from the Royal Minaret to the roof adjoining where they were, she became dreadfully alarmed lest they should be advancing upon them in that covert direction. She clung to his arm, and with a smile of con- fidence the impression of which it will be im- possible ever to erase from his memory, said " Johnny, I know you will not leave me, a poor friendless, helpless girl, to the mercy of these eunuchs, who most probably have perceived us ; but believing you to be armed, and knowing that you Englateras would not be sparing in making them taste of the steel, they do not deem it safe to openly attack you ; but by making a noise they fancy you will tly for safety where some of them TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 95 are lying in ambush, and from whence, like mid- night assassins as they are, would pounce upon you, and having dispatched you, would then return to settle accounts with me." At this stage her voice became inaudible, when Brown said, " Belinda, you are not mistaken in the confidence you have reposed in me. My countrymen do not leave the one they admire or esteem, particularly when that one is an un- protected female, to the mercy of ruthless miscreants. Fear not, I will try to imitate their example. I came not here for the purpose of gleaning information, and deriving gratification from you, a confiding angelic being, and then, for my own safety, cowardly flee from you, — and leave you at the mercy of merciless eunuchs. Oh, no ! Belinda, my countrymen know not such cowardly retreats ; nor is there a moment to be lost. Listen, they are fast advancing up the winding staircase. Kemain where you are ; let the same spirit of self-control and firmness which accompanied you through the night's proceedings continue to hold possession of you; and in a short time you will see what strength there is in an Englatera's arm when defending the one he 96 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt admires. I will hasten to meet them as they ascend on to the roof, and ere one of them advances towards you it will be over my corpse," At this moment another " ha-ha !" signified that Belinda was mistaken as to their where- about, as by looking in the direction from whence the last shout proceeded, she could see that they were amusing themselves on their return from the Bower of Pleasure. Finding they were not perceived, yet believing that any attempt to escape would be fruitless, if not fatal, she continued : " Well, Johnny, as I before mentioned, a something tells me that, after now parting, we shall never more converse. If such be case, will you, on your return to that enlightened city of London (where you most probably will hear it remarked that Turkish women, as well as Turk- ish men, possess neither taste, ideas, nor feeling), contradict it, and assure those who may entertain such an opinion that Turkish, as well as other women, can appreciate what is noble, honour- able, and just ? But Turkish men will not allow us to have a mind, taste, or voice of our own ; consequently we, being treated as contemptible TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERA.GLIO. 97 slaves, can have no interest in anything outside Harem walls or such domiciles. Nor are we, after passing our days in the most abject state of misery and solitude in this world, allowed to hope for any comfort in the next. The men tell us we possess no immortal souls ; that we are like the tree in the forest — where its trunk falls, there it may lie. Now, Johnny, I cannot under- stand why we are thus destined. While living we are merely the tools of inconsiderate and selfish men, ever subject to their most capricious whims ; and not satisfied with lording it over us while here, they tell us that only for them is there to be bliss in futurity, that Mahomed can with the power of his breath create for them as many wives or pleasing companions as they desire. Do you think that the Power which created man, and next sent woman as his help- mate, could or would be so unjust as to make this distinction ? No, Johnny, I do not believe it. Besides, I am beginning to think that Mahomed has not now as much power with the gods as he formerly had, and perhaps he may not on their arrival in the next world be able to supply Sultans and Pashas with the many beautiful wives and 93 brown's dream, and Belinda's attempt magnificent Harems which they expect are prepared for them ; indeed, it strikes me, that in the next world there will he no such privileged classification as Sultans and Pashas expect. It may turn out that persons will be considerately treated according as they have treated others while here. Although the Omnipotent Power when endowing us with the organs of sensitiveness, kindness, consideration, and faithfulness, left us free to exer- cise these gifts, the manner in which we have exercised them according to our power or opportunities, may tell either ill or well against us. It may happen that we poor things, who must be so submissive to the lords of the creation here, may be treated more considerately hereafter. "Oh 3 Johnny! the men of Turkey are so selfish and inconsiderate, that they subject us, without the power of remonstrance, to their every- desire ; and they become so insensible to every- thing except the will of subjecting us to their selfish ends, that our unfortunate country is the most degraded and despised in existence. Will you, on your return to that powerful independent Englatera, where women are justly TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 99 permitted to mix among society, and by their council and kindness as well as devotion and attention, aid the men in all noble enterprises- will you represent how cruelly we are treated ? I have heard that in England, woman, with caution and careful attention, steers through the ruffled oceans of adversity or disappointments, the barque of her husband's destinies ; and who is more competent or who more entitled to be the pilot of those destinies ? her all is centred in his course through life. Should his barque become tossed upon the troubled billows of disappointment or adversity, who will, when he is inclined to let it carelessly drift into that fathomless ocean of carelessness, take hold of the helm and steer it once more into a secure harbour, from whence he can behold other barques tossed and battling with uncertainty against the waves of opposition and disappointment, until at length they become so foundered that nothing appears of them but a shattered wreck ? Who may he thank that his was not floating among them, and appear, as they did, a bye-word for scornful conjectures? Is it not woman? Yes, it can- not be denied that when you men are on your H 100 bkown's dream 5 and Belinda's attempt wayward thoughtless course, and when a few steps further would involve your ruin, woman, either through her love for him who was about to plunge himself and her into endless misery, or for the sake of his acquaintance or former positions in society, whispers in his ear the truthful words 6 Stop were you are ; another step forward, and you are a beggar, an outcast, or it may be a felon !' He opens his eyes, which until these truthful words caught his ear, he obstinately kept closed. He looks around him, and beholds in his interrogator the person of either his wife, sister, next-door neighbour, or a once-loved object. He pauses, looks around him in bewilderment, and replies, 'Yes, I will return; my blind course was nearly run. You have saved me, one step further and I was in the gulf of ruin.'" " Now, Johnny, this is, I fancy, the course, the just course, which English women, be they wives, sisters, or next-door neighbours, adopt towards their countrymen ; and why should they not ? how could they act otherwise ? The men are not selfish, inconsiderate despots ; they allow the women to understand that they are not only useful members of society, but that, by TO ESCAPE FROM THE SEBAGLIO, 101 their council and exhortations, they materially aid in upholding the honour and dignity of their powerful empire. I have been informed that the men of England, when at an opera or other place of amusement, cannot, be the entertain- ment ever so varied or pleasing, thoroughly enjoy themselves in the absence of their female friends or acquaintances. There may be in England, as well as other places, a few who love to be single on such occasions, and who, with bulldog impertinence, keep staring at every woman who may happen to come under their vulgar gaze. There are, I doubt not, some of these impudent objects of scorn to be found in London, as well as in other large cities ; it may also happen that there are a few who, if the laws would permit or society sanction, would multiply the number of their wives according to the length of their purse. But from what I have been informed, these objectionable individuals are but few, while here in Turkey they are general, because encouraged and strengthened by the laws which sanction such profligacy. No matter what may be the amount of attraction or amusement, we dare not entertain the idea of h 2 102 BROWN'S DREAM, AND BELINDA'S ATTEMPT witnessing any of them ; the men being, as they assert, lords of the creation, can go where they wish and do as they please ; we must not re- monstrate against it. They leave us pining in these dungeon abodes from morning till night, and from night till morning, with only the one disagreeable object before us, that of our black eunuch, who is suspicious of our every move- ment, and in whose uncertain keeping is the spark of our existence, as if, by representing us when out walking or otherwise, to have noticed any male individual, we would by his Majesty be deemed inconstant, and ere long have to pay its dreaded penalties, the nature of which, as I before mentioned, if time or opportunity permitted I would have shown you in yon Chamber of Horrors." At this moment the minute gun from Admiral Gray's flag-ship announced the hour of four, at which announcement Belinda, in broken accents and with tearful eyes, said, " Johnny, in a few moments my eunuch arises ; I must away. Fare thee well ! I hope not for ever ; yet, if for ever, remember one who will not forget thee." So saying, she hastily departed. For a moment TO ESCAPE FROM THE SERAGLIO. 103 Brown became as it were paralysed — lie did not know how to act, whether to follow her, and, in defiance of her black keepers, attempt to take her from the Seraglio. He placed his hand on the hilt, and was about to unsheathe his sword, when prudence interposed, and re- commended him to leave the attempt for a more favourable opportunity. After sadly gazing in the direction in which she disappeared, he directed his steps towards his quarters, and when arrived at a portion of the roof of the Seraglio from where he fancied he could by kneeling down reconnoitre as to what position the eunuchs occupied, he attempted to kneel ; but no sooner did his knee touch the felt of the roof, than he awoke from his dream. And what must have been his surprise on finding himself under the blankets in the region of rats, instead of being as he fancied, on the roof of the Seraglio, contriving to escape without the eunuchs perceiving him. Although not of a superstitious cast, I have not the least doubt had he been in the vicinity of Clapham, where he might have consulted some of the gipsy tribe, he would have asked what they thought his remarkable dream denoted." THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. Haying got out of that dreamy maze, which was a rather difficult task, I will call your attention to the Old Seraglio. Many persons after reading about Harems, may say, "Dear me ! what kind of places are these Seraglios where the Sultans wives reside? they no doubt are magnificent and princely residences. His Majesty would never select for such beautiful women any but the most splendid and cheerful abodes." They are splendid, so far as high walls and other prison-like plans constitute them ; and cheerful, so far as loneliness and want of society can render them. The places generally selected for Harems are uninhabited localities, where nothing save the murmuring of rills, singing of birds, or floral landscapes, could attract the attention of their inmates from the Sultan* who next to Mahomed, is, in the eu- THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. 105 nuchs and priests' estimation, the most exalted of beings. To convey but a faint idea as to the exterior appearance of the Old Seraglio, permit me to request that at the northern side of the Serpentine in Hyde Park, you fancy you per- ceive a wall quite as high as that surrounding Newgate Prison, and inside this wall only the roof and upper-story windows of a gloomy looking building to be visible — or an imitation thereof, as Harem windows have iron bars or thick rods of wire securely fastened across them, and which must on no pretence be removed without the eunuch's permission ; if in the eunuch's absence the ladies should attempt to remove them, for such transgression against Harem discipline these refractory ladies are liable to severe punishment. By picturing to yourself in the centre of Hyde Park a large gloomy-looking building, surrounded by a forest of trees, and a wall which reaches nearly as high as the tallest of their branches, in this imaginative view you can perceive the outward aspect of the Old Seraglio. The interior I will not minutely attempt to describe, as no Christian without a firman from the Sultan is allowed to cross its 106 THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. threshold. Even when armed with that royal licence, you are only permitted to see very limited portions of it in company with half-a- dozen eunuchs, who being previously informed of your visit take particular care that none of the ladies are visible. When escorted by this patrol of eunuchs, and passing through the limited portions allotted to visitors, which con- stitutes a few yards, some pleasure gardens, and an imitation of Mahomed's ancient armoury, you would fancy you were walking around the interior of some prison or lunatic asylum, where keepers do not allow the inmates to be seen by visitors. You look in vain for an opportunity of throwing a sheep's eye at any of its fair occupiers. When at the eastern end of the pleasure garden adjoining the banks of the Bosphorus, on looking towards the western side of the Seraglio, it being on a more elevated position than where you stand, and the countless beds of roses inter- sected with small shrubberies which are beauti- fully situate on a sloping incline, and between which small rivulets are gently gliding down the vale, and as they ebb into their silvery fountains their gentle murmurs add a kind of musical THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. 107 charm to the scene ; after listening for a short time to the murmuring of these rills and behold- ing the indescribable loveliness of the prospect around you, you would be half inclined to think that ladies might contentedly dwell in such a charming place. But when you leave this bower of beauty, and again behold the sepulchre or prison-like aspect of the Seraglio, whose inmates must not show their faces, but who are con- stantly kept under the lock and key of jailor eunuchs, you can easily conceive that the atten- tion bestowed upon the cultivation of the gardens is merely, by their inviting and lovely appear- ance, to try to wean the ladies' thoughts from the pangs of remorse or regret which they must daily experience — but no beauty of scenery or household luxuries can curb the power of thought or stem the tide of loye or regret. Many of these ladies, previous to their admission into Harems, had most probably felt that tickling or feverish pulsation which it is natural for young persons to experience when they begin to think of trusting their future destinies to the care of another. The portion of land allotted for pleasure gar- 10S THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. dens is extensive, and the ladies, for pastime, often devote hours in using the spade or shovel as well as the hoe. Even when employed in the pleasing capacity of culling or cultivating the flowers, a sprinkling of melancholy or regret must overshadow their pleasure, as after devoting many hours to the arranging of pretty bouquets, their thoughts will most probably wander to bye- gone times when they were free, and had some Frederick or Alonzo to whom they might present them, it is not improbable but at that moment they may feel a pang of regret for not remaining the occupants of their rural cottages where they no doubt would be the admired of rural swains, instead of being as they then were, fragments of and make-shifts for mock royalty. Supposing the old Seraglio at Stamboul was transferred to Hyde Park, and a Turkish sentry placed at each gate leading to the park, as is the case at Stam- boul, so that no lady-killer or rakish-looking in- dividual dare enter, how long would such sentinels and the one hundred eunuchs who constitute the ladies' body guard, keep the garrison from being stormed ? I think I may answer, not many hours. The fact of the ladies being de- THE OLD SEHAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. 109 tained against their inclination would act as a stimulant to Londoners in speedily releasing them. Although the generality of the inmates of Harems are, from the time of their admission, con- stantly protesting against the unkindness and surveillance to which through unfeeling eunuchs they are subject, still there is no voice, much less an arm, raised in their behalf, The men of Turkey are dead to their every cry for deliverance. Must not their manhood and patriotism flow at a very low ebb? There are their sisters and neighbours in whose society they passed their childhood, and whose juvenile freaks of friend- ship and pastime should, except they were void of every particle of brotherly or manly feeling, be renewed in their recollection on hearing how cruelly they were treated; still they will not make an effort to release them, or to put an end to that Harem system which not only causes the generality of the population to appear as degraded beggars, but causes those they are bound to protect to become the serfs or concubines of a puppet Sultan, or punch-and- judy Pasha. In many instances their betrothed 110 THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. are, through Pashas or eunuchs' influence, forcibly compelled to become the inmates of Harems; and when parting, those they loved not only swore lasting fidelity, but promised on the first opportunity to relinquish a regal for a rural life. Still these noodles of men will not make an effort to release them. There may be a few who, if they dared, would try the experiment; but these few could not achieve the object, nor can they with safety convey their feelings to others. The fetters of tyranny and despotism are so systematically placed upon all Mussulman, and the results attendant upon their forcible re- moval from their slavish bearers of so punishable a nature, that none will attempt to unloose them \ hence it is that the Turks, although smarting under the most galling and tyrannical yoke, must through the old cause, want of unity or sympathy among themselves, calmly submit to their degraded position. And not unlike the hordes of starved* looking dogs which prowl through their streets, when pinched with hunger or too severely scourged with the lash of tyranny, they may occasionally bark or show their teeth, but dare not bite. Nor need they hope for a discontinuance of such a THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. Ill system so long as Harem influence continues in the ascendant. The means to keep up the enor- mous expenditure incurred by the inmates of these hothouses of iniquity must, by hook or crook, be wrung from the miserable inhabitants. What matters it to a Sultan or his clique of well- fed Pashas and priests whether the mass of the populace hunger or not, so long as they can clutch the loaves and fishes, and bask in the smiles of their countless mistresses? They reign, while they can, in all the pomp of a Solomon, and who dare oppose them? The voice of liberty or opposition must not throw a shadow of gloom o'er their sunshine of bliss. Could that voice of liberty be but once raised in the council chamber, and echoed outside its pestilential walls, what a happy moment it would be for Turkey ! Yes, if the spirit of liberty and independence could but once be whispered among the populace, and the prospect of freedom with its golden rewards be but pictured to their imaginations, although submissive as they have been through ages of tyranny, were that phoenix of liberty to once raise its golden wings and lead the way, they no doubt would victoriously follow, m THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. and in their march for freedom's shrine level to the dust the emblems of tyranny and degra- dation which are manifest in the Seraglios. What a happy hour it would be for Turkey, and what a blessing for Europe, if on the ramparts of these Seraglios they could but plant the tree of liberty ! No more need European nations dispatch their armies to protect a sick Sultan; the Turks, when permitted to enjoy freedom and appreciate its results, would buckle on the armour of inde- pendence, and banish from their thoughts the fanatical barbarities of Mahomedanism, and imitate European nations in husbandry and intelligence, instead of continuing, as they now are, almost blind to every particle of independence. They direct their onward course only through the dark intricate maze of priestcraft and Harem bondage. They must not try to leave that dark degrading track; the beacon of freedom is not allowed to burn on their path ; were a glimmer of its inviting rays to appear on their route, and they to attempt to clutch at its redeeming beams, they were instantly, without judge or jury, con- demned to where they could never more behold its inviting rays. Let their wrongs be ever so great, THE OLD SERAGLIO AT STAMBOUL. 118 they have no just mode of righting them. The old saying that there is not much use in going to law with the devil while the court is held in hell, is in their instance fully verified. The Turkish mode of address is, like most other Turkish institutions, but a farce, and will remain so as long as European nations look on with cool indifference, and by their silence encourage the Sick Man's barque more speedily to drift into the gulf of destruction. In my remarks concerning the Turks, I treat them as they appeared under their servile yoke during the Crimean War, and in the late Sultan's reign. If since that period there has been any alteration for the better, I shall be most glad to hear it. Some time ago, it was rumoured that the present Sultan was about to discontinue the Seraglios. I doubt it. But as my remarks are confined to 1855-6, before he ascended the throne, I cannot nor will not attempt to describe what changes may have occurred since his acces- sion. Let us hope he will try to carry out his promises of reform, and discontinue Harem abuses. If he does, the hand of friendship should from every European nation be kindly 114 THE OLD SEHAGLIO AT STAMBOTJL. extended to him, as it is an undertaking which will require a long pull and a strong pull thoroughly to accomplish. There is no doubt but he would have a majority of the en- lightened population with him. Still he cannot, be his inclination ever so strong, carry out his resolve without European aid. There are many enlightened, although but few learned, persons among the Turks. Could they but shake off the bonds of slavery and fanatical bigotry which seem to encumber all grades, and turn their attention to industry, convert the Old Seraglio into a ware- house, or temple of commerce, I doubt not but they would become a prosperous people. They are temperate, cunning, and thrifty ; possess a lovely land which by attention might be made to teem with nature's richest products. No one would more gladly see them become industrious and free than would I. But I fear that unless the screw of European influence be tightly applied to the councils of the Sublime Porte, and the hand of friendship more warmly extended to the present Sultan if he be but in earnest about reform, Turkey will continue, as it now is, the most unenviable nation in existence. THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. I fancy there are many persons who can scarcely believe that in the nineteeth century the usages of barbarous and superstitious epochs are still celebrated in their former pomp by the followers of Mahomed. Once every year a pilgrim starts from the Old Seraglio, Stamboul, to repair to the tomb of Mahomed at Mecca. For weeks previous to his departure the ladies of the Harems and other distinguished notables are vieing with each other as to which shall send the richest and rarest of gifts to the Prophet, whom they believe annually dispatches an invisible messen- ger from his dwelling in the clouds. This invisible messenger, they seriously tell you, arrives at the tomb a little after sunset on the evening the pilgrim pretends to deposit the presents in the sepulchre, from whence, as the I 116 THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE P0R MECCA, story goes, this invisible messenger conveys them to the Prophet's celestial abode in the clouds. But if rumour be correct, and I am inclined to think it is, instead of the faithful pilgrim depositing the gifts in the tomb, he stows them away in some secure place, and when the ceremony is over, by selling them realises what handsomely recompenses him for his pilgrimage. Before sunrise on the morning of the pilgrim's departure all presents for the Prophet are to be forwarded, with the donor's name attached, to what is termed the pilgrim's store-room at the Old Seraglio. The pilgrim, attended by elders, priests, and pashas, is there to receive them and to recite the sublime and suitable epistles forwarded with each, as all fair donors are supposed to accompany their gifts with epistolatory remarks as to how they wish the Prophet to dispose of them. An old Greek who for many years had been employed as a kind of out-door messenger at the Seraglio, and who, like my lord mayor's fool, by feigning sim- plicity had an opportunity of knowing many mysteries and intrigues connected with Serag- lios, assured me that every year there were THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. 117 thousands of pounds expended upon presents sent to the Prophet, and that attached to each are the most ridiculous epistles. One kdy when forwarding a nicely embroidered night- cap, con- jured the Prophet when placing it upon his head not to draw it over his ears so as to prevent her prayers from reaching the fountain of his grace. Another, when sending a pair of white gloves, hoped that in his sanctified view they would be emblematic of her maidenish innocence ; adding as a postscript, that since her admission into the Seraglio she had never shared the Sultan's society. I spent many a pleasant evening listen- ing to the amusing anecdotes of this super- annuated servant of the Old Seraglio, who without a doubt had a thorough knowledge of Harem discipline and usages, — and if inclined could inform an adventurer how he might easiest and with most safety steal an occasional trip to the interior of the Seraglio. Hearing so many rumours about the imposing sight to be witnessed on the pilgrim's departure, I naturally felt anxious to witness it, and shortly after break of day I started for the scene of the ceremony. Although the sun had scarcely risen i 2 118 THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. when I arrived at the principal entrance, the place was thronged with spectators of every description both on foot and horseback, and in coaches or cabs. Close to Dianas Bower, lead- ing to the Royal Minaret, were rows of carriages containing the fair occupants of the Sultan's and Pashas' Seraglios, who as usual had their faces blindfolded with disgusting white handkerchiefs. Close to the ladies' carriages were numerous magnificently caparisoned Arabian horses which belonged to the Ministers of State, Pashas, and other offical dignitaries, who were in the pilgrim's store-room assisting in the ceremony of blessing and attaching the Sublime seal to the gifts for the Prophet. This part of the ceremony concluded, the Sultan, Priests, Pashas, and their pipe-bearers, emerged from the pilgrims store-room ; and in the centre of the square ad- joining the eunuch's hospital the trunks which contained the presents were placed upon resters of cedar and yew, and covered with richly- wrought gold embroidery. The priests, with as sanctimonious an aspect as they could possibly assume, knelt before the trunks, and with fer- vent accents invoked Allah to permit Mahomed THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. 119 favourably to accept their contents, as tokens of fidelity from his devoted followers. During the time the priests were invoking blessings and assuring the Sultan of their attachment to his person and crown, groups of frightful rag- amuffins presented themselves, carrying old tin cans, kettles, saucepans, and every description of article with which they could create a noise* Next came a drove of camels with imitation of drums tied upon their backs, and guys of drummers trying to beat them. Next came about two hundred donkeys, on whose backs were priests, some of whom were the most hideous imitations of man I ever beheld. They appeared to be perfect types of the ourang-outang or gorilla species ; so much so, that could Mr. Du Chaillu but succeed in bringing one or more to England, he would not only cause a fresh sensation, but would throw his gorilla enterprise quite in the shade, so far as curiosity, apishness, and defor- mity of the human species is concerned. After these unshaven priests, whose unshorn physio- gnomies gave them anything but a clerical appearance, next came the band of the Sultan's body guard, composed chiefly of Bashi-Bazouks, 120 THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. who are tolerable musicians and smart-looking fellows, which is a rare compliment to have to confer upon anything Turkish. Next came a noble-looking Arabian charger bearing, as the Turks remarked, a life-like statue of the Pro- phet, which was held erect by a dozen attendants. The right hand of the Prophet contained a wand, the left a compass ; the former as emble- matic of the power which Mahomedanism is destined to wield wherever the compass of the Koran may point out as their dominions. On the arrival of the Prophets statue the cheers and joyful manifestations of the multitude became boundless. It would be woe to the Christian who, in that moment of their fanatical excitement, dare point the finger of ridicule against the sanctity of their saint. When the shouting or yelling had subsided, a breathless silence pervaded the whole assembly : all eyes were turned towards Diana's Bower, from whence the Sultan and a motley escort of ancient- looking courtiers advanced to where the trunks which contained the presents were laid. The Sultan, after remarking that it gave him much pleasure to behold so large, respectable, and THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. 121 loyal an assembly congregated to clo honour to the Prophet, next congratulated the pilgrim upon being the favoured individual selected to start upon so high and holy a mission as that of proceeding to repair to the tomb of their clear Prophet. His Majesty next dwelt most forcibly upon the liberality displayed by the ladies in forwarding so many useful and expensive gifts which he doubted not would be pleasing to Mahomed. His address to the ladies concluded, the procession started for Seraglio Point, where a Koyal caique was in waiting to convey the pilgrim and presents to Lower Scutari, from whence he is supposed to proceed on foot. The ragamuffins, many of whom were not only shoeless and stockingless, but coat and hatless, beating their old tin cans, saucepans, and kettles, led the way ; they were closely followed by the grand vizier, chief eunuch, chamberlains, lord high admiral, and the numerous other hangers-on about the palaces. Next followed the bust of the Prophet on horseback, then the Sultan, surrounded by a numerous suite of strange-looking courtiers and warriors. Among the latter was Omar Pasha, who, it was said, is 122 THE PILGRIM^ DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. an Austrian by birth, and occupier of one of the most distinguished Harems in Turkey, that is, excepting the Sultan's. None of his wives were, it was said, over sweet sixteen, of high families and endowed with a more than ordinary share of education and beauty. He having adopted Mahomedanism, and become a renegade from Christianity, as well as bearing the name of being a gallant chieftain, caused all the tender sprouts of the Sublime Porte to desire to share his society ; and so it is, if rumour be correct, that he is master of more pretty mistresses than any man of the present or ancient times except the Sultan or Solomon. After the warriors, states- men, and courtiers, next followed two camels bearing the presents ; then the pilgrim and priests, riding upon donkeys ; next the camel drum-bearers and their guys of drummers ; next the ladies of the Harems and their eunuchs, some in carriages, others on foot ; then the band of the Sultan's body guard, playing many stir- ring, though for the occasion not suitable airs — such as, " Behold the conquering hero comes," " He walks with might on duty's path," " Let traitors fear his mighty power," &c. &c. When THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. 123 arrived at Seraglio Point, the pilgrim stepped into a caique (boat), bade good-bye to the spectators, and in a short time was swiftly gliding over the billows of the Bosphorus. The multitude kept cheering until among the waves his caique disappeared from their view; many of them returned to their fireless and perhaps breadless cabins, where they might appease their appetites upon the consoling thought that they had just witnessed one of the greatest of their annual absurdities; I and other sight- seekers might return half ashamed for having remained the greater part of the morning be^ holding such mummeries. But that assembly, as well as most others, was not without its attractions* You must bear in mind that there were many fascinating ladies present, whoj although guarded by eu- nuchs, could by a sly nod or pleasant look, command or induce one for hours to hover round their carriages, Any of you who are accustomed to visit Eotten EovV when the carriage-way is almost blocked up, and when fair ones wearing their most killing looks, with dimpled smiles are peeping through their carriage windows, can best 124 THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. judge how hard it was for one to turn his back upon those Eastern beauties. You many times might have turned upon your heel and become resolved to bid good-bye to the pilgrim's cere* mony, but at each time a brilliant pair of eyes would say, " Johnny, do not go; we cannot every day get to carry on even a nodding commu- nication with an Englatera. Do stop, supposing you have to bide your time ere you attempt to return our nod or gaze." These, or some such communicative signals from inviting luminaries would, were you ever so willing to depart, recall you to the scene of the pilgrims departure. Yet at the conclusion of the ceremony, and after all your squinting and nodding attention, you had without even the gratification of whispering fare- Well or of uttering "When shall I see you again?" to play your retreat with the not very consoling idea that you Were as great a fool ag ever, and had that morning, if fresh proof were needed, shown your folly to the fullest extent by remain- ing a beholder of so absurd a ceremony. When walking up and down by the ladies' carriages, the eunuchs who were in attendance as footmen, valets, and postillions, with no livery except THE PILGRIM'S DEPARTURE FOR MECCA. 125 modern-looking epaulets and that unchangeable coat of black mail which nature bequeathed them, eyed you in something of the same style in which you might look upon one whom you fancied was about to deprive you of your watch or purse. In these forbidding-looking eunuchs you can perceive no trace of that willingness with which a footman, page-boy, or coachman at home would turn his back while his mistress might honour you with her converse. When the pilgrim's caique had departed from their view, the multitude gave three cheers for the Prophet and three times three for the Sultan* then dispersed, and so ended one of the most tomfoolery exhibitions I ever witnessed. CELEBRATING ST. PATRICE'S DAY AT CONSTANTINOPLE, In a foreign country, be one's stay ever so limited or otherwise, and be the amusements or national festivals of that country ever so varied and imposing, they but seldom cause sojourners to 126 CELEBRATING ST. PATRICK'S DAY forget those of the land of their birth. Indeed, the celebration of foreign anniversaries but the more strongly reminds one of those at home, and induces persons to celebrate with extra eclat the annual festival of their native country. Previous to St. Patrick's Day, it being whispered at Scutari, Kulalee, and Para, that the Emerald Islanders were about to thoroughly drown the Old Saint, and that the valley of Stamboul would on that night ring with a real Donnybrook melee, and that all English and Scotch who wished to join the assembly would be received with Ceid mille a failthe, caused the applicants to be numerous ; and the foreman's residence at Stamboul being deemed suitable for either Irish jig or shillelagh set-to, was by all Emerald Islanders, and their rollicksome English and Scotch friends, pro- nounced to be the most convenient place for a Donnybrook assembly. All who were anxious to attend had to forward their names a week previous to the 17th, so that the cruiskeens and their contents might be prepared accordingly. It was amusing to witness the many converts to Irishism which occurred on that occasion, as well as the barefaced stories and excuses to AT CONSTANTINOPLE. 127 which persons resorted to procure leave of absence. One Yorkshireman, who had never seen Ireland in his life, hoisted a large bunch of shamrock conspicuously in his cap, and address- ing his commanding officer in a rich Yorkshire brogue, represented himself as a native of Tipperary, and as such hoped he would be allowed to spend the evening at Stamboul in assisting to keep up the festival of his patron saint! The officer knowing perfectly well he had never seen Ireland, could not avoid smiling at the cool manner in which upon the strength of falsehood he urged his claim, yet believing that if his request was not granted he most probably would take French leave, told him he might go, but to take care that, instead of drowning the saint, he did not get drowned himself. On it being whispered through the barracks that Yorkshire Jack, by hoisting a shamrock and representing himself as a Tippe- rary boy, had procured leave to spend the evening at Stamboul, induced so many to follow his example that the officers deemed it best to encourage them to remain at Scutari, and many of the officers being sprouts of the Emerald Isle, 128 THE FIRE. it was whispered that they ordered on the quiet a tolerable supply of whisky, granted a shed adjoining the barracks, and so deprived us at Staniboul of the presence of many scarlet-coated companions. THE FIRE. Still we mustered considerably, and at about half-past eleven p.m., when in the height of merriment and joining in the chorous of " We'll have another cruiskeen lawn.'" a sudden gush of light similiar to lightning flashed through the windows, and instantly illuminated the assem- bly. A short pause ensued, when the cry of " fire, fire," from without caused every one to be immediately on foot. Many were the surmises hastily arrived at, as to the cause and where- abouts of the fire. Some fancied the Turks had set fire to our store-houses, others that the Seraglio had accidently become ignited, and that there was a chance for us to play the part of gallants in rescuing its fair inmates from the THE FIEE. 129 flames. Many and devout were the prayers we offered that the latter might be the case, as then the eunuchs should, although no doubt re- luctantly, have to accept of our services in res- cuing the ladies — and we would have, oh ! what a rare opportunity of leading from the scene of the fire — some of the prettiest women in exis- tence, and particularly at that witching hour of midnight when in the adjoining shrubberies it would not be difficult to give the eunuchs the slip. While indulging in the hope of speedily applying ladders of ropes to the ladies' windows, an Armenian arrived with the intelligence that the house of Pashas, which in Turkey resemble our House of Lords, was on fire, and from the direction the wind was then blowing would endanger the safety of our powder and shell magazine. "With this announcement the cere- mony of drowning the saint was suspended, and after telling off one of our party and two Armenians to remain in charge of the whiskey and culinary department, each of us took an extra drop of the cratur, and supplied himself with the best of friends to be met in Turkey, viz., a sword or revolver, We having two first-class fire 130 THE FIRE. engines at hand, adjusted the hose, got into harness, and mustering about sixty, swept the engines over rugged streets, up narrow windings, and down dark alleys, until we speedily arrived near the principal entrance of the house of Pashas. On our approach the streets and avenues leading to the fire were thronged with spectators, who on perceiving us approach ran hurry- skurry in all directions, and the sentries, Turk-like, changed their positions from outside to inside the gates. We having unexpectedly appeared among them, and they never before seeing engines drawn with wheels, or made in such like shape, fancied we were a party of Russians who were about to surprise them, and that our engines were pieces of cannon. By the time we reached the gates the place was de- serted, and the flames left to make as speedy progress as possible : nor could the Turks by remaining tend much to diminish them, as from the spout of a kettle or large watering-pot one could as effectively discharge almost any quantity of water as from the kind of engines they then possessed, which were of that portable nature that while carrying them on their shoulders two THE FIRE. 131 men could run up a ladder, scale a wall, or dance a hornpipe without experiencing the least incon- venience. I believe the Turkish authorities have, since the Crimean War, attempted an imitation of ours. When arrived at the principal entrance we found the gates had been made fast against us, and that hand-bells were ringing through the locality, arousing the inhabitants and informing them that the Kussians were coming. At this time the fire was raging most terrifically, and the building being on an elevated position it illuminated nearly the whole of Constantinople. On demanding admission we were met with, " Yoke bono " (no good). The wall which sur- rounds the building being very high, we could render no assistance from without, and the night being bitterly cold, and the spirit of the cratur beginning to depart, like our French neighbours we required something to keep us stirring. Nor were we long unemployed, as one of our party, a real Tipperary boy, shouted out, " Arrah! be jabers, 111 wait no longer ; so here goes. " And so he did, for accompanying his word with a greyhound bounce, he in an instant was moun- 132 THE FIRE. ted on the top of the wall, which being Hat he found no difficulty in holding his position. A Woolwich chap, who acted as superintendant of our fire brigade, conveyed a length of the hose to Tipperary ; and there being an abundant supply of water at hand, one of the engines was set to work, and ere the Turks who had congregated in a group in the court-yard had time to disperse, Tipperary with a perfect aim lodged a volley of water among them, on the receipt of which it is easier to surmise than describe the confusion and fright which ensued, as seeing no engine, and having no idea of the use of hose, they could form no supposition as' to where the water came from. A few of the most blind of Mahomed s dupes fell upon their knees, and commenced screaming to the Prophet, thanking him for as they fancied sending water from his cisterns in the clouds. But in a short time, from the perfect manner in which Tippe- rary directed his aim, he caused the devout portion of Mahomed's followers to imitate the others in playing a quick retreat. At this juncture, two old Pashas, their pipe-bearers, and a few officers and Priests, arrived; and one THE FIRE, 133 of the Pashas having resided a short time in London, during which period he acquired a little European ideas and knowledge of our engines, ordered the sentries (who stuck to their posts inside the gates) to admit us. After some persuasion and assurance that we were not Muscovites, he succeeded in prevailing upon them to open the gates. Once inside, having plenty of water, and Woolwich Harry being a first-rate conductor, we soon got the flames under. Although when starting from the ceremony of drowning St. Patrick with a determina- tion of speedily returning, we being three sheets in the wind, it could scarcely be expected we would return without cutting some figures. When the Turks perceived we set-to with a determination of extinguishing the fire, they Turk-like left us to do the work while they did the looking-on part. Under awnings in a cosy corner of the court-yard, where neither the keen frosty air nor large flakes of snow, which were now falling, could reach them, and from whence they fancied they might uninterrupted behold us do their dirty work, a group of Pashas, Priests, k 2 134 THE FIRE. and officers, contentedly seated themselves and commenced smoking. Having the flames nearly subdued, the moment for action of a more stirring nature was beginning to ripen, and at a given signal from our Woolwich commandant we put the hose to the right-about, and with full force from the two engines discharged several rounds of water among that group of lazy drones, who coolly looked on while we did their work. The unexpected announcement of so cold and unpleasant a visitor, as the water proved to be, had among that distinguished circle a dreadful effect. In a moment, pipes, chairs, fezzes, cloaks, and all unattached articles, were by the water flying in all directions, and their owners, from whose garments and hair the water was falling like rain, ran with a life-and-death speed from, the watery element. It was laugh- able to behold these fair-and-easy going person- ages, who on ordinary occasions would scarcely move, then ran as though it were for the life of them. In a short time we had the yard to ourselves, when we again turned our attention to extinguish the smouldering embers. This complete, we secured the hose, got into harness, THE FIRE. 135 and started to complete our St. Patrick carousal. But when about to leave the yard an interpreter informed us that in consequence of assaulting the Pashas and Priests by throwing water upon them, a file of Turkish soldiers, who acted as policemen, were outside the gates, and had orders to arrest us ; " and," added he, " do not be mistaken ; they have their bayonets fixed, and if you resist are commanded to use them against you ; besides, all the inhabitants are anxious to give you a drumming for your insolence, and, as they term it, assault upon the Pashas, so that under the circumstances I would advise you to make fast the gates, and do as the Turkish sentries did on your arrival— take up your position inside* while I hasten to the Capitain-Pasha at Tophana, who no doubt will issue immediate instructions for your safety. " " Mister Interpreter, v cried one of the Tippe- rary boys, " excuse me, but you have said quite enough. We thank you for your advice, but cannot, will not, adopt it." We came here to render assistance, for which we neither ex- pected nor required thanks ; but since we are threatened to be rewarded with blows, depend 136 THE FIRE. upon it we will not die without a kick. Tell your ungrateful countrymen that were they to number ten times as many, if they do not in- stantly withdraw from their threatening attitude, sixty Englateras will speedily march over their carcases." On the interpreter informing them of our determination not to quietly surrender, his message was met with " Away with the Christian dogs. To the Bosphorus hurry them. ! " " Pull out their tongues!" and other insulting expressions, Which showed us that matters would quickly assume a serious aspect. We advanced towards the gates, which were thrown open, out- side of which were thousands of the inhabitants, with clubs, spades, axes, and other formidable weapons, and forming the front and rear guard were soldiers whose bayonets bristled most pleasingly to the eyes of the savage multitude. When arrived at the gates, we had scarcely turned the engines across the gateway to act as kind of bearers in preventing them from rushing upon us in overwhelming numbers, ere a gruff determined Tipperary voice, which was not to be misunderstood, proceeded from our ranks, com- manding us to imitate the old English watch- THE FIRE. 137 word, " Up guards, and at them." In the twink- ling of an eye, swords were out of their scabbards, and revolvers at half cock, the sight of which struck terror in the cowardly multitude, particu- larly as one of our revolvers in the hurry of the moment accidently discharged, at the sound of which they commenced running in every direc- tion, and soldiers as well as civilians might be seen tumbling over each other in their anxiety to escape. In a very few moments we had no opposition to our leaving, as not a Turk was to be seen. When we found they were out of harm's way, we discharged some shots to let them know that if inclined we might have justly chastised them for their unkindness. Some of you may say, " But you deserved chastisement; why throw water upon the Pashas and Priests?" We, no doubt, might have committed the sin of trans- gression by so doing, but supposing your houses were on fire, and your neighbours of a cold frosty night to come to their rescue, I can scarcely think the most soft-handed or high-minded of you would plant yourselves on forms and stools, pull out your pipes or cigars, commence smoking, and contentedly look on while your neighbours 138 THE FIRE. endeavoured to extinguish them. If you should become a Turk, by only attending to the looking-on part, then I say you would deserve to get what they got — a good duck- ing. In justice to the officers and Pashas, I must admit that none of them appeared among the motly half-savage crew, who, had we been defenceless and resisted their authority to arrest us, would no doubt by overwhelming numbers have murdered us. I afterwards learned that there was no one connected with the government present, and that the soldiers, w r ho appeared only to run away, were induced to attend through re- presentations made to them to the effect that a party of Christians were assaulting Pashas^ Priests, and everyone they met in Constan- tinople. There is no regular police force ; a few companies of soldiers picquetted under a sergeant or corporal some miles between each other, are the sort of guardians the inhabitants of Constan- tinople have to look to for the safety of their persons or property. Some of these ex*officio policemen were the heroes who intended to lodge us in their underground lock-ups, but as DROWNING THE SAINT. 139 they fully verified the old proverb that he who fights and runs away, shall live to fight another day, and as Tipperarys hasty and stern command of " Up guards, and at them," saved us the trouble of testing their strength, we did not trouble ourselves to afterwards ascertain by whose authority they threatened us ; and so ended our anticipated pitched battle. DROWNING THE SAINT, On our return to complete the ceremony of drowning the Saint, we found that our comrade and the two Armenians whom we left in charge of the whisky and culinary departments, had indulged rather freely in testing the strength of the creator, as Carroty, with a large shillelagh flourishing over the Armenians' heads, was trying to make them join in the chorus of " Limerick races." On perceiving us he suddenly dropped the shillelagh, and with that kind of unconscious craft which Bacchus's followers ofttimes display, 140 DROWNING THE SAINT. told us that he was merely putting the Armenians through their facings. He no doubt was putting them through facings, but it was facings they did not much admire, as they every moment feared he would bring the shillelagh in contact witti their craniums. To prove to us that he had not, as he said, tasted a drop in our absence, he made an effort to lift a kettle off the fire to mix us some punch ; but no sooner did he make the effort, than he tumbled head foremost against a pile of empty cases which we had placed in rotation as a substitute for a sideboard, and on which were most of the glasses, decanters, tumblers, and other necessaries for our convivial meeting, the greater portion of which he not only broke, but spilt their contents; and to make amends for the mishap, while stretched upon the floor, he turned up with, as the fancy term it, a regular mug of impudence, and said, "You are a pretty lot of comrades to treat a poor fellow thus, after he acting so admirably as housekeeper in your absence ! " So saying, he drew up his legs, and with " Good night, lads, I'm off to Charlestown," he tucked the tail of his coat under his hips, and settled down on the DROWNING THE SAINT. 141 boards for a blanketless sleep. Fortunately for us, two large logs of wood which we placed upon the fires previous to our departure were cheer- fully burning, so that in a short time we had the kettles simmering, were enabled to mix a few rounds of punch, and with the aid of warm water remove the icicles from our garments and hair, and set-to in earnest to drown the Saint, which operation was performed without either a black eye or broken nose. In no place, even including old Ireland, could the Saint's anniversary be more reveren- tially or jocosely kept than it was in that lonely, uninhabited locality adjoining the Old Seraglio at Stamboul ; and although the assembly was composed of English, Irish, and Scotch, even when in the height of their merriment, or when labouring under the strongest influence of the creatur', no angry or offensive expression occurred between them ; the most pleasant and kindly feeling governed their proceedings. What* ever little differences of opinion as to countries or other casualties that may through passion or otherwise occur between them at home, none is manifest abroad, particularly in war time, when they greet each other only as brothers, fighting 142 DROWNING THE SAINT. under the same banner and marching shoulder to shoulder against their common enemy. It would be well if some narrow-minded folks at home would imitate the example of soldiers and civilians abroad, and look upon all from the three countries as sheep of the same fold, and worthy to be treated alike by those who claim to be their masters or shepherds, instead of occasion- ally displaying their ignorance, narrowminded- ness, and bigotry, in newspaper advertising columns by stating that " No so-and-so need apply." Those persons who thus manifest their littleness, perhaps until a recent date, never ex- pected to be able to employ a domestic. They forget that when so-and-so, or their friends or countrymen appear at the cannon's mouth, and at the risk or expense of their lives, materially aid in upholding the honour and greatness of England, they are not told they need not apply, or that their services are not needed* It is pleasing to know that this disgraceful habit of advertising for domestics is now almost confined to a few proprietors of certain low concerns, who are actually living by the very countrypeople they proclaim as being unworthy to be their meiiials* When daylight began to appear, Brown pro- DROWNING THE SAINT. 143 posed before separating we should, by torch- light, and fife-and-drums, serenade the ladies of the Seraglio ; his proposition being seconded, a show of hands signified it was carried unani- mously ; and when about to start, another of the party begged to move as an amendment that when at the Eoyal Mint facing the principal entrance to the Seraglio, a few rounds of blank cartridge be discharged from our revolvers as a salute of honour for the pining beauties of the Seraglio. This radical amendment, after some discussion and a little opposition, was likewise unanimously carried. An Armenian, with a kind of instrument resembling an Irish bagpipes, led the way, followed by two drummers, four fifes, three bugles, and two clarionets ; the remainder of the party marched two deep, with their swords unsheathed. The moment the sound of the music caught the ears of the eunuchs they aroused all the ladies, who rushed to the windows in their night dresses, and for once we got a peep at Turkish women without their faces being covered with disagreeable handkerchiefs. When arrived opposite Belinda's window, Brown being com- mandant or master of the ceremony, cried tc lia!t>" 144 DROWNING THE SAINT, and commanded us to present arms, which seemed to delight Belinda, who, although appearing rather shy in her dishabille, seemed to highly appreciate the honour conferred upon her. Suspecting that to indulge long in so harumskarum a frolic might he attended with unpleasant consequences, we hastened to the Royal Mint, discharged a few rounds of blank cartridge, which caused a general harking of dogs and the sudden opening and shutting of windows in the surrounding neigh- bourhood. Finding that the vicinity of Stamboul would soon become too hot to hold us, we hastily de- parted for Galata, took possession of two Greek lighters, rowed out on the Bosphorus facing the Seraglio, where drums, fifes, clarionets, and bugles were called to action, and " Patrick's day," " Garryowen," " Tara's hall," " The meeting of the waters, " " The girls we left behind us," and several other Irish airs were, on the twilight breeze wafted to the ladies of the Seraglio, who no doubt thought us a funny set of individuals. The ap- pearance of a commander and crew putting off from one of our men-of-war to I presume, require an explanation as to our break-o'-day manoeu- DROWNING THE SAINT. 145 vring, which we might not be able satisfactorily to give, caused us to steer our course to Scutari, where we on landing on the beach met a large party of Scutari boys seeking lighters or some mode of conveying them to our quarters, and, as they acknowledged, to pay the eunuchs and ladies of the Seraglio a peep-o'-day visit. On satisfying them that we had already performed that task, we made fast the two lighters, and ac- companied them to their St. Patrick's banquet- room, where on our arrival we could perceive that Bacchus had effectually exercised his power, as stretched topsy-turvy in every direction were many of the guests. After testing the strength of the Scutari cor- dial, with our force augmented we started for Lower Scutari and Armenian Town, where with fifes and drums we aroused the inhabitants from their peaceful slumbers, and after having many not very devout prayers offered up for us and our peep-o'-day visit, at five o'clock a m. on the morn- ing of the 18th of March we concluded our St. Patrick's holiday, and caused many to wish they might never more be disturbed by the admirers of Sprigs of shillelagh and shamrock so green. MISS NIGHTINGALE AT SCUTARI HOSPITAL. I will now call your attention to a large building situate on the banks of the Bosphorus and Sea of Marmora, which, although separated from Constantinople by the bay of the Golden Horn, being on a very elevated position is quite visible. This remarkable building, to which I wish to call your attention, is Scutari Hospital. After in a small boat battling for a considerable time with the rough billows of the Bosphorus, J. safely arrived near the hospital when my attention was first attracted by beholding several companies of fatigue soldiers marching in twos or fours, and carrying with them empty stretchers. They were sadly and silently wending their way down that rugged steep which leads from the hospital to the landing-place. Feeling anxious to know on what mournful errand they were proceeding, I followed MISS NIGHTINGALE AT SCUTARI HOSPITAL, 147 them, and on reaching the beach perceived in the distance a large steamer bearing down towards the hospital. This vessel was coming from Sebastopol, and had on board a full cargo of wounded and dying soldiers. When she cast anchor, and the captain ordered all hands to assist in unshipping her freight of almost lifeless soldiers, n^ver can I forget the horrid and heart- rending scene which I beheld on these poor fellows being placed on stretchers and carried to the hospital. Some had their arms, legs, and other portions shattered to pieces, while not a few were deprived of both legs and arms ; and in no instance did I hear any of them utter a murmur against their fate ; their only regret seemed to be that there was no prospect of their ever be- holding their native land or those they held dear. After remaining as long as my nerves would permit me to witness such a scene, I directed my course towards the hospital, where on arriving I perceived mattresses and other substitutes for beds being hastily arranged in the corridors and every available place. On inquiry I ascer- tained that, in consequence of the crowded state of the hospital, Miss Nightingale had to 148 MISS NIGHTINGALE resort to this mode of securing accommodation and comfort for the cargo of wounded and dying soldiers which was then being landed. Hearing so much of Miss Nightingale and her noble deeds, I felt anxious to see what kind of person she was. On my way towards the kitchen of the hospital, where informed I was most likely to see her, I met three or four ladies whose mien and costume signi- fied they belonged to some religious order ; they had in their hands bandages, bottles, lint, and other necessaries, and were hurrying so hastily in the direction of the principal entrance to the hospital that I afterwards was sorry I accosted them ; but fearing I had lost my way to the kitchen, I merely inquired if I was in the right direction, when one of them, as she con- tinued almost running, replied, " That is the way, Sir; but Miss Nightingale cannot, will not, see anyone to-day except on business immediately connected with the last arrival of poor soldiers." Before I had time to inform her that I did not require or expect to have an interview with Miss Nightingale, she disappeared in one of the narrow windings of the long corridor. A little further AT SCUTARI HOSPITAL. 149 on I met several groups of ladies hurrying in the same direction, and carrying with them all kinds of necessaries. I next met a convalescent sol- dier, from whom I ascertained that the ladies I first met were Sisters of Mercy, and, under Miss Nightingale's instructions, were hurrying with necessaries for the soldiers as they were car* ried into hospital. With the efficient aid ren- dered by the medical staff, in conjunction with Miss Nightingale and her noble band, this cargo of wounded and dying soldiers was attended to in that prompt and kind manner which it would be almost impossible to expect. While the convalescent soldier and I were con- versing, several groups of ladies passed and re-passed. Presently the commander of this de- voted band followed, when her appearance as she hastened through the long corridor was the signal for salutes from the sentinels ; and although she did not seek such attention, still those who ad- mired her could not confine their respectful feelings. No general or commander, be he ever so brave, would be received with half the voluntary pomp or honour which every grade of soldiers I would bestow on that unexampled lady. Did she l 2 150 MISS NIGHTINGALE but undertake to command a brigade at the Crimea, no enemy, though he were ever so stub- born a Russian bear, could stand the charge of her enthusiastic followers ; indeed, future histo- rians might have to record her in battle as a second Jean de Arc ; but as it was, she had under her command the bravest as well as most kind and devoted of soldiers, who although not contending in the field of battle mid the conflict of warfare, were, in Scutari and other hospitals, with the implements of peace, kindness, and attention, warding off the dread stroke of death, and restoring to animation the almost lifeless sufferers around them. It was only in that awful emergency that woman's devotion and kindness could be fully manifest and appreciated. The soldier when he enters the field of battle, and when the bugler sounds the alarm or advance, may entertain the hope that should he become victor, he might be justly rewarded for his gallantry ; consequently, this prospect in view might stimulate him to action, and appear as it were a glimmer of hope in the midst of danger. But those ladies who, also at the risk of their lives, attended to the every want of the wounded AT SCUTARI HOSPITAL, 151 and dying, and who night or day were never absent from their post of duty, saw no golden prospect glitter in the future. The pleasing picture of at some future time becoming general of a division, or commander of a distinguished corps, did not spur them to action ; their ardour and attention to the dying and wounded was not centred on worldly considerations. The hazardous and truly soldiers part which they undertook to perform was discharged in that efficient manner which only the tender-hearted, noble-minded, and devoted could accomplish. Woman alone could successfully perform such patient and tender duties. When in the field of battle it may be truly remarked that in the midst of life those engaged are on the brink of death. In a general hospital one is not much more secure, where fever, cholera, diarrhoea, and numerous other contagious diseases are hourly hurrying their victims into eternity. In the midst of these awful scenes of the dead and the dying, you might behold a tall, pensive- looking lady, whose expression of countenance indicated the anxiety she felt for those under her care. You might also behold other ladies seeking her for council, among whom were many 152 MISS NIGHTINGALE who, whatever opinion some people may enter- tain as to their selection of a secluded religious life, they in time of need proved themselves true Samaritans. I need scarcely remind you that this tall, pensive-looking lady (whose appearance among the wounded and dying soldiers was the signal for acclamation, as well as the medium of inspiring in the most desponding bosom a feeling of hope) was Miss Florence Nightingale, without whose efficient aid and kind attention not half the invalid soldiers who returned to England would have again beheld it. The prompt manner in which they were attended to under her instruc- tions, as well as the cheerfulness and cleanliness by which they were surrounded, tended in a great measure to render them more quickly convales- cent, and enabled more speedily to rejoin their regiments. Scutari hospital, under Miss Nightingale's superintendance, may justly be termed a nursery for strengthening instead of diminishing our army. If such a title would not be displeasing, I fancy we might term her our best recruiting serjeant. Were it not for her, many a brave soldier might languidly linger in hospital until AT SCUTARI HOSPITAL. 153 he either relapsed into his former precarious state, or became affected by some of the con- tagious diseases around him. But as there are a sufficiency of living memorials to certify to her kindness and attention to all who needed it 5 I will merely refer to those who are now no more, but who when about to bid adieu to this world had the consolation of being encouraged on their unknown journey by the soothing words of this kind lady and her companions. Who that has a spark of grateful feeling can look back to the dreadful scenes of the Crimean war, and not entertain the warmest affection for those ladies who, in a distant land, far from home or relations, with a sisterly love, whispered in the ear of dying soldiers, if not the balmy words of spiritual consolation, at least the hope of comfort ? If that dreary spot on the banks of the Sea of Marmora facing Scutari hospital, where no fond mother, sister, or brother ever treads its turf, or sheds upon its mould the tear of sorrow, or breathes the sigh of regret, but where a few undressed tombstones are the only emblems to show that beneath are lying motionless many of England's heroes, whose remains, if rumour be 154 MISS NIGHTINGALE correct, will not be allowed to smoulder undis- turbed by those barbarians in whose cause they sacrificed their lives ; — if those who are now smouldering in that far-off heathenish clime, could arise from their graves, who would they hail as their best of benefactors ? "Would it not be Miss Florence Nightingale and her com- panions? Next those ladies, the object of their regard would be the generous Lord Herbert, whose spirit, like their own, has now, alas ! fled, Lord Herbert was the soldier's friend, and in him Miss Nightingale, I doubt not, has lost a dear devoted friend, as he not only aided her in every possible manner in which his official capacity enabled him, but by his council strengthened her power of action. If, on the dreary banks of the Sea of Marmora, the spirits of these departed soldiers could assemble, they might remark : " Old England, you commanded us, and we willingly obeyed ? But it strikes us that these indolent Turks are scarcely worthy of the noble part England and France have acted towards them. The day has been gained on their behalf ; remnants of the allied armies have victoriously returned to their AT SCUTARI HOSPITAL. 155 native countries ; yet what beneficial object is achieved? The Russians, it is true, may for the present be compelled to halt on their march of encroachment, but ere long they will again start on a fresh expedition of conquest. Will England and France then so readily step forward as the champions of the Sick Man ? We doubt it. In the Crimean encounter we lost the flower of our armies, as well as lowered our exchequers, and what may we expect from the Sick Man in return ? Nothing ! He is powerless ; he is penniless ; his laws are rotten ; his govern- ment is shivering on its tottering foundation of profligacy ; he is incurable. Harems are the hobby-horses on which he is fast riding to beg- gary, if not perdition. Let him put an end to these dens of infamy, and release from the bond- age of degradation and contempt the women of his nation, and instruct them in morality and industry. The women, if once free from Harem bondage, would imbue the men with principles of industry and self-respect ; then there might be a hope for that country, and a reason why the Rus- sians should not with impunity be allowed to over- run it. But except some such remedies as 156 SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT. these are applied, the Sick Man will never become convalescent, nor the people of England and France be justified in again so heroically espous- ing his cause." SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT. Not being satisfied with my first visit to the hospital, which was at mid-day, I thought I should like to have a peep at its exterior by midnight, when the stillness which reigned around it was scarcely disturbed except by the moans of the dying, or gentle opening or shutting of ward doors by the lady nurses who noiselessly entered to see if their services were needed. I meditated for some time on the solemn stillness and gloomy aspect of that nursery of death, where at a short distance from its sepulchral-looking walls the occasional glimmer of lamps or dimly-burning candles from the night nurses r departments were the only tokens which signified that animation reigned within ; but on drawing close to a ward door or window, the moans which proceeded from the dying would cause the SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT IS T IGHT. 157 most hard-hearted to deeply feel for those who were hopelessly battling with that messenger who knows not to-morrow, but who the moment he announces his arrival all must alike yield to his sway, and immediately bid good-bye to the „ charms of life. A short time gazing upon that death -like place, with the moans of the dying (a warning to all) occasionally greeting your ears, would cause you to say, {i Here I am to night, in the enjoyment of health and spirits, yet ere to-morrow's eve I may be like many within, unsuccessfully battling with that enemy who will not surrender, and like them be clutching at some secure lifeboat to steer me to a secure haven." I assure you that, whatever might be your previous concern about dying, when looking upon that gloomy picture you would, except very hardened, be convinced of the awful reality of death. You might also, in that moment of silent meditation, ask yourself if you required the service of that lifeboat to row you to a secure harbour ; had you previously by belief or otherwise engaged a passage, when the disagreeable thought would strike you that you had not; but that when about to embark you were told by the pilot 158 SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT. your name was not among the list of passengers who had previously secured their passages, you then, but too late, experience the truthfulness of the old proverb j " Never leave for to-morrow what you can do to -clay." After contemplating for a short time on that not very pleasing prospect, I walked towards the banks of the Sea of Marmora in the direction of the burial ground, where those who died in the hospital were interred : and from where as I looked around me my gaze was lost in the vast expanse of the ocean, the waves of which furiously dashed against the beach, and scattered their spray on the mould of those who lay motionless beneath its white foam. The screams of the sea-gulls or other wild fowl, as they flew inland in search of prey, were the only life-sounds which greeted my ears. The moon's silvery beams as they reflected on the undressed headstones ena- bled me to perceive many familiar names whose owners were sleeping the sleep of death, and who a short time previously were, like me, in the enjoyment of health, and perhaps addressing letters to dear ones at home, assuring them of their speedy return. But such is the uncertainty SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT. 159 of life that most probably ere the ink was dry or the mail-bag had enclosed them in its mysterious folds, the spirits of their writers had fled to that other world from whence no tidings can reach us of their safe or unsafe arrival. There is too deep and serious a mystery connected with this other world for one to dare attempt to raise the veil and steal a glimpse at its prospect. Mysterious, indeed, is the manner in which all its arrange- ments are carried out. "We have clever persons among us who by their study and science can al- most undertake to unravel any difficulty or solve any question, yet with regard to the next world they are as much in the dark as ourselves. The keen eye of study or bright gaze of intellectual capacity are alike blind to the mysterious uncer- tainty of our prospect in the world to come. And perhaps it may be as well for us to be kept in the dark, for were we certain as to our state in the next world, we might even become greater hypocrites than the generality of us already are. Supposing a messenger was to come from the next world and inform us that we had only a few days or hours to remain here, and that our future happiness or misery depended upon our repent- 160 SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT. ance or humiliation during that brief sojourn, would we not turn the greatest cowards imagin- able, by immediately falling upon our marrow, bones and sprinkling the ground with our tears? not so much in atonement for our transgres- sions, as for fear of having uncomfortable quarters allotted to us on our arrival there. It is both wise and just not to allow any of us to know our fate, as then there can be no advantage taken by them who have not much of life's troubles to contend with. When the pulse once ceases to beat, and the smile of joy from our lips or brightness from our eyes depart, the rich and the poor alike start upon the same route to give an account of their stewardship. And are we not told that upon their arrival before the judgment-seat there is no distinction of persons ; that according to their merits while here all are placed upon equality there, and that those who were clothed in fine garments and had their pre- sence announced by the booming of cannon or flourishing of trumpets will appear no greater, or perhaps not so great, as many poor outcasts who went hungering to their gates, and who because they might have craved the crumbs which fell SCUTAEI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT, 161 from their tables were given into the safe keep- ing of some kind- hearted policeman, who saw that they were lodged in safe keeping ? This announcement of no classification in the next world, although hardly palatable to the rich, is gratifying to the poor. Only think of Johnny the valet, who while here had with almost the swiftness of a bird to attend to his master's every command, and who if he displeased that master in either the arranging of his imperial or cravat, was fearful lest he should dis- charge him without a character— what a contrast to see Jack as good as his master in the world to come ! Then there is Mary, the ladies' maid, who, if she happen to let one of her mistress' curls leave its graceful shape, she is for one week confined to the region of frowns — wont Mary feel proud on being placed upon equality with her mistress ! But as regards this classification system, we are kept as much in the dark concern- ing it as we are to the time we shall have to start upon that unknown journey. Yet it is cheering to think that all are to be treated according to their merits. Were people not impressed with such belief, earth would become a second hell. As it 162 SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT. is, thousands, nay millions of us scarcely ever think of dying until we are no longer able to go pleasure-seeking, and until that unwelcome messenger called Death pays us a visit; then, when we find our days are numbered, we shout for mercy, and begin to get awfully afraid of the devil, whose existence we scarcely ever thought of while able to stir about. If well-to-do in the world, when w r e arise in the morning we spend a few hours with the assistance of our maid or man-servant in making ourselves appear genteel ; after breakfast we order our coach, drive for recreation, and look with contempt upon all who cannot, like ourselves, turn out with a pair of chesnuts or greys. When evening comes, and when the sons of toil are retiring to repose after their day's labour, we are sallying forth in search of new pleasures. We remain in the ball-room or among the dinner-party until our heads reel or our eyes grow dim through the excitement of the polka or waltz. We don't go home till morning, nor get out of bed till mid-day, at which hour when we appear before that awful tell-tale called the mirror, and look at our pale features from which the bloom of health or glow of beauty is SCUTARI HOSPITAL AT NIGHT. 163 fast declining, we may say, " Dear me ! I do not look as I used to do ; what is the cause ? why are my cheeks losing their colour, or my eyes their brightness? From this moment I will keep better hours, and indulge less in champagne breakfasts. I find that all the luxuries of which I can partake are not able to keep me from drawing closer and closer to that cold resting- place from whence I cannot get a glimpse of the pleasures of life, or share in those midnight revelries I used to love to patronise." But enough ; I am not going to preach a moralising sermon, nor would I like to see people with faces as long as to-day and to-morrow, and never mix among social or pleasant society. I do not believe in those folks who wear sanctified looks ; nor will I try to make you imagine that my visit to the tombs of the dead at so unusual an hour in so lonely a place has converted me into a saint. But this I know, that if we occa- sionally experience such visits, they would more strongly remind us of having some day to pay that debt which those who were lying motionless beneath had just discharged. After a short stay at Scutari, being satisfied M 164 HOMEWARD BOUND, that not only had Miss Nightingale, her lady companions, and the medical staff, fulfilled to the letter that memorable remark, " England expects every man to do his duty/' but you find that every one in all other departments from the highest to the lowest were anxious to discharge in as efficient and praiseworthy a manner as possible the respective duties allotted to them. You again return to Stamboul, and peace being proclaimed, find the three persons I have so often mentioned packing up their traps, and in other respects preparing for a homeward voyage. HOMEWARD BOUND. On your return to Stamboul, you find Brown, although unusual for him, looking rather down- cast. You ask him what is the matter : he tells you he came to Turkey with a light heart and easy mind, but on returning he cannot boast of possessing either. "While thus conversing a messenger arrives from the admirals office in- forming them that a vessel was shortly expected HOMEWARD BOUND, 165 from Balaklava 5 and that they had better prepare to embark for London. Jones and Robinson received the intelligence with joy. Brown, although not manifesting the least concern, by glancing at his countenance, from its variety of colours, one moment red, another deadly pale, you could easily perceive that his mind was ill at ease; and he being of too haughty a nature to admit he was experiencing the least uneasiness, he no doubt the more keenly felt its sting. Most probably he had made arrangements on that night to attempt to procure Belinda's release ; if so he must be sorely grieved when the order to embark blighted all hopes of trying the experiment. Indeed the announce- ment of their having to suddenly depart must be a sad blow to him, as the time being so short until they were to embark, he had no opportunity of communicating with her. Then in the absence of any explanation, what would she think of his sudden departure ? might it not strike her that he was faithless, and to shirk the responsibility or danger he would risk in trying to get her from the Seraglio, cowardly, without even saying farewell, hasten away, 166 HOMEWARD BOUND. and leave her to contemplate on the faithful- ness of man, and to regret she ever placed confidence in him? The fear that she might for a moment entertain such an idea preyed more upon his mind than any other con- sideration, and accounts for the many times in a few moments he changed colour. But he not being composed of that paper kind of mate- rial which will yield to every pressure and bear against none, without uttering a murmur was the first to arrive on board the ship. But was he re- solved to remain on board, or was his hurried arrival there but to make people believe that his leaving Stamboul did not cause him regret? From the manner he passed the Seraglio, his comrades and the wily eunuchs surmised that he was not going for good; and the ladies of the Ser- aglio were much disappointed and displeased at the manner he left, as when the eunuchs informed them that the three Englateras were suddenly ordered home, they assembled in their windows, and from the waving of handkerchiefs and other marks of esteem showed that they had no cause, as the eunuchs first anticipated they would, to regret the long stay of their English neighbours. HOMEWARD BOUND, 167 Brown being always very polite, they expected that on his departure he would exceed the others in acknowledging their farewell attentions ; but they were disagreeably mistaken in the cold manner in which he passed them, scarcely noticing their presence. There must be some cause for this cold indifference — had they pre- viously offended him ? If so, he could scarcely be so ungallant as, when about to bid them a long adieu, not to acknowledge their farewell attentions. Yet he passed them so heedlessly that on his comrades departing, the windows were unoccupied and the pavement not strewn with a bouquet. If he did not intend to again return, he would at least have paid more atten- tion to the occupant of one window. But there seemed to be some kind of an invisible under- standing between them, as it was remarked that Belinda did not by the waving of her handkerchief or otherwise manifest so much emotion as the other ladies. Perhaps she heard from the eunuchs that their orders to leave were so sudden that he could not inform her of his departure, and she relied upon his promise if an opportunity occurred to on that night procure 168 HOMEWARD BOUND. lier releasement ; not, as many may imagine, to bring her with him to England. That would be impossible. No captain of a ship dare enter such a prohibited commodity upon his bill of lading ; he might easier take one hundred Slidells and Masons on board than one Sultans wife, that is, if it was known, and he not clear off the Dardanelles. If once braving the billows on the Mediterranean, he need not care for a Sultan or chief eunuch ; but as European captains are forbidden to grant passages to Turkish women, especially to inmates of Harems, it would be impossible for Brown to have her securely stowed away. Consequently he did not entertain any such idea. His object was to endeavour to procure her release, she having an aunt of position in Bulgaria with whom she was to reside, and there in quiet solitude con- template upon the many sorrowful hours she passed in the Seraglio. When Jones and Eobinson arrived on board the ship, their first duty, as they reckoned it, was to request of the captain not to allow Brown to return on shore. They in a few brief sentences informed him of the fatal result likely HOMEWARD BOUttD. 169 to attend any attempt he might make in procuring Belinda's release. The captain informed them that under the circumstances he would issue orders that none of the passengers were to be allowed to go ashore, so that Brown could not imagine he was the only one denied the privilege. Previous to the captain's orders being made known, one of the middies noticed Brown in a corner of the hold where his luggage was stowed away, carefully trying some caps which he placed upon two six-barrel revolvers. The middy not being aware of the contemplation of a Harem visit, became alarmed lest Brown was about to use them against some one on board, and under the influence of fear hastened to the captain, told him what he saw, to which the captain replied, " All right ; I know 7 all about it. Hoist the blue peter, lower the jibboom. By this time Brown appeared on deck and was about to hail a Greek boat, when the chief mate asked him if he was not aware that in consequence of the short time they had to remain in the Golden Horn, no would be allowed to go on shore. Brown replied that he was not aware of it, nor would he obey such instructions ; adding that he 170 HOMEWARD BOUND. was under military, not naval orders. The captain, on hearing this reply, stepped forward and informed Brown that while on hoard his ship no military arrangements would or should in- terfere with his instructions. " Besides/' said he, how would your superintendent of stores like me to go to his depot and interfere with his rules? Make up your mind not to leave this deck. You are now returned to me, and were you the first prince of the land, on shore you should not go. " That is a kingly manifesto," replied Brown; "hut listen to me, captain. Although one of the last to encourage insubordination or refractory pro- ceedings, supposing I made up my mind to go, and could procure a boat to convey me, how would you prevent me ? " " In the easiest manner possible," coolly replied the captain. At this stage of the proceedings they eyed each other with that defiant look which persons assume when determined to resort to other weapons beside the tongue. For a moment both remained silent, when Brown after reviewing the gloomy future which was before Belinda if destined to remain in the Seraglio, and how that she might imagine he made no effort to release HOMEWARD BOUKD. 171 her, broke the silence by informing the captain he was determined to go ashore whatever might be the consequence. The captain being a man of experience as well as determination, informed Brown that on board a ship as well as on shore, everyone not obeying instructions was subject to martial law; " and," added he, " under ordinary circumstances I would, were you my first officer, for the defiant and disrespectful manner you addressed me, have called the carpenter, who with assistance, would speedily place you in not very comfortable quarters ; but as I know a little about the cause of your anxiety to return to Stamboul, I can sympathise with you, although for your own sake I will not allow you to go on shore. Step into the cabin, we'll crack a bottle of champagne and talk the matter over." The gentlemanly manner in which the captain ad- dressed Brown took him quite off his guard, as from his previous demeanour he expected to have to fight his way on shore, and although aware in that capacity he would have but little chance of success, in the excitement of the moment he would have risked it. When seated in the cabin, the captain, 172 HOMEWARD BOUND. addressing Brown, requested liim to seriously listen to what he was about to mention ; first to bear in mind that there were few to whom he would take the trouble of conveying his opinion, for, said he, " my seafaring life through which I am never out of danger's view, has caused me to think less of troubles and disappointments than landsmen might. But experience and the multiplicity of dangers to which I am daily, nay hourly, subject, causes me to more thoroughly understand where real danger lies. Do you hear me, old boy ? " At this moment Brown was in deep meditation, most probably about the Seraglio ; he paid no attention to what the captain was saying ; yet on rousing up he said, " Oh yes, captain, I perfectly understand that the Bay of Biscay is a dangerous place." " Hang you and the Bay of Biscay ! " returned the captain; " you are not paying the least attention to what I say. But mark me ; I would rather chance my ship among the largest and most dangerous shoal of rocks on the African coast, than run the risk of trying to get one of them she-beauties from the Seraglio. I admire your spirit, and though old as I am, if I saw any HOMEWARD BOUND, 173 prospect of success I would sheer off on such a cruise myself ; but where there is no prospect, only maniacs would venture. You may long to procure the liberty of a Sultana or whatever she may be, and she may sigh to go to England." " Oh, no, captain," interrupted Brown, " there is no such agreement attached to the deed of her release." " So much the better, " said the captain, " as there is less consequence to be attached to her escape. If she only wants to get free from the Seraglio, she can at any time adopt a plan, without causing you and her to risk your lives. When a woman feels inclined to carry out her ideas, no power will prevent her ; our fair acquaintances excel us in that admir- able quality of not yielding until they carry out their resolves. Besides, I will forfeit my head if by the time we arrive at Malta you have not forgotten all about the Seraglio. The Maltese women are devilish pretty, besides they have not to wear on their faces them thick white hand- kerchiefs which caused the Turkish women to look for all the world like a party of juveniles playing blindman's-buff. At this part of the conversation the chief mate interrupted them 174 HOMEWARD BOUKD. by announcing to the captain the arrival on board of the last of the passengers and cargo, and to know if they were to prepare for sailing. " Aye, aye," replied the captain; " get in all the gear, and get up all the canvas. It now blows a favourable breeze, with which we will in a short time bid good-bye to the Valley of Dogs." He then opened a drawer from which he took a powder, and when helping Brown to a third glass of champagne, put some of its contents into his glass, remarking that it was an ingredient to prevent the champagne from having too much effect upon a disturbed mind. Brown after emptying the glass began to feel a kind of stupor creep over him ; he reclined upon a cushioned-seat, and in a short time was in the close embrace of Morpheus, through whose vision he was victoriously leading Belinda from the Harem, and like a victor of a hundred battles was proudly contemplating on the prospectof his glory. How long he must have been allowed to indulge in this pleasing vision may be imagined from the fact that when he awoke, the ship, with the aid of a stiff breeze, was gallantly passing the mouth of the Dardanelles. Nor would he have HOMEWARD BOUND, 175 then awoke but for the stupidity yet kind feeling of Jones and Robinson, who from the time he fell asleep, against the captain's orders, kept hovering around him. They fancied he was dead, and hearing it remarked by the sailors that when a shark follows a ship some one is to die, and at that moment one of these frightful mon- sters having appeared at the stern, Jones shouted out " I knew he was dead ; see there is a shark waiting for him ; " he accompanied his shout with a bounce upon Brown, and with a pitiful cry of " Are you dead?" raised him clean from the cushions, which caused Brown upon opening his eyes to look confused, and the captain and crew to join in a hearty laugh. When he rubbed the effects of the sleep from his eyes, his first inclination was as he thought to have a look once more at the Seraglio ; but what must have been his surprise and dissapointment, when going on deck to find that he was destined to no more behold either Belinda or the Seraglio. Regret was useless ; his conscience cleared him of any inattention in striving to release her, as the captain's powder unconsciously deprived him of all power to attempt it. Fate and her own sagacity must accomplish what he could not. 176 HOMEWARD BOUND. Finding that he was foiled in his attempt he retired to his bunk, nor did he before they arrived at Malta indulge in conversation or the many time-killing amusements which are resorted to on board a ship. When on shore at Malta, after viewing many other remarkable buildings we called at St. John's Cathedral. It is a magnificent edifice. We were shown the altar from which a certain emperor took the golden gates, which are now replaced by silver ones. Let us hope that no other person of the name will ever be so hard-up as by taking these silver ones commit a sacrilegious felony. I do not think so much of Malta as other peo- ple might. It is a sultry, and in my opinion an unhealthy place, void of much natural scenery or social or refined society. Of course there is a sprink- ling of elite and fascinating residents, but the generality of the inhabitants, from their business appearance, resemble our Petticoat-lane traders. I heard a deal about the Maltese women, but do not think so much of them ; they are mostly all fat, not fair ; how they appear at forty I cannot say, as the day being excessively warm scarcely any but juveniles were to be seen. Between Malta and Gibraltar, one day after HOMEWARD BOUND. 177 dinner, the general topic was about the Maltese women. Brown now beginning to recover from his reget in not being able to make an effort to release Belinda, and the captain being in a plea- sant mood, requested of him to sing a song, which he at first declined on the plea that every- one but him had cause to rejoice at being home- ward bound ; but as such an apology would not be accepted, he sang the following of Moore's— THE TIME I'VE LOST IN WOOING. The time I've lost in wooing, Watching and pursuing The light that lies In woman's eyes, Has been my heart's undoing. Though Wisdom oft has sought me, I scorned the lore she brought me ; My only books Were woman's looks, And folly's all they've taught me. Her smile when Beauty granted I hung, with gaze enchanted Like hi ai the sprite Whom maids by night Oft meet in glens that's haunted. 178 HOMEWARD BOUND, Like him, too, Beauty won me, But while her eyes were on me, If once their ray Was turned away, O, winds could not outrun me. And are those follies going, And is my proud heart growing Too cold or wise For brilliant eves Again to set it glowing ? No ; vain, alas ! th' endeavour From bonds so sweet to sever ; Poor wisdom's chance Against a glance, Is now as weak as ever. Brown had no sooner finished, than the captain, who was a jolly old chap, grasped him by the hand, saying, ;i You are a clever fellow ; your selection could not be more suitable for the occasion. I am glad you acknowledge that brilliant eyes can have as much effect upon you now as when at Stamboul Cheer up, there is money bid for you yet. But when once more on dry land, be more particular in casting anchor so close to Cupid's Bower ; it is very HOMEWARD BOUND. 179 dangerous soundings. Them she-crafts, when in full trim, sail up the Bower of Pleasure so tempting and gaily, that except one is well skilled in nautical tactics, they are sure to carry off the bowsprit of the heart, and leave the figure- head in a sad plight. " We speedily arrived at Gibraltar, which is very well as a garrison inlet. I believe it is the most formidable in existence. Woe be to the proud ship that dare to pass it in defiance ; the bull- dogs which peer from its ramparts would- not only bark but dangerously bite. Next comes the Bay of Biscay. Oh, what a disagreeable place ! Its waters seem to be ever at variance with each other, and, being restive themselves, are determined that all who visit them shall experience the same uneasiness. But unless passengers experience some disagreeable- ness, they would have no idea of a seafaring life, which although it sometimes may produce sweets, has always a plentiful supply of sours, especially i on a long voyage in a sailing vessel, when fresh necessaries disappear and cannot be replaced, and one has to repeatedly turn upon salt junk, I brick biscuit, or greasy cocoa, from which I I devoutedly pray, deliver us. 180 HOMEWARD BOUND. The scenery between London and Constanti- nople is beautiful, and many remarkable places appear in view, such as a portion of the walls of Troy, Mount Etna, a view of the ancient city of Greece, and the Archipelago. After spinning many yarns and cracking many jokes, we at length sighted old England. What a pleasing sight ! how delighted the eye once more to behold these time-honoured cliffs, which we many times feared we would never again behold. Only those who have been to a foreign country, and separated from friendly companions or esteemed friends, can fully understand the amount of joy experienced after a long voyage on beholding the land of their birth or adoption. Every pleasant sensation which the wings of memory could recal to the imagination would immediately present themselves to one's view, and the doubts and surmises which might have previously existed in the imagination would instantly vanish, on beholding those familiar faces one longed to see. No more would Eastern beauties reign supreme in the throne of their affections; all except Belinda would be erased from their recollection, but her vision has without a doubt found a constant dwelling in Brown's memory, neither OUR FLEET AT SEA. 181 distance or time can diminish the esteem in which he still holds her. OUR FLEET AT SEA. While still on board ship, and bravely gliding o'er the waves in the direction of Dover, permit me to observe that it is on the bosom of the billows England's grandeur and the real materials of her glory are manifest. The strength of that mighty nation is in the keeping of her vigilant sentinels at sea. How grand the sight, and how proud the beholder must feel as he glides o'er the billows, to behold in every direction the war- dogs of England, who are the guardians of its homes and treasures, as well as the terror of their enemies. On almost every speck of the ocean you can behold vessels steering either to or from England ; and anchored in suitable positions are their sentinels, in the shape of men-of-war, who by their presence secure the safety of peace and commerce, as well as demonstrate the power of Great Britain. The Commander-in-Chief, n 2 182 OUR FLEET AT SEA. Secretary of State for War, or Prime Minister, are according to their official capacity entitled to rank pre-eminent in the councils of the empire, but in my opinion the First Lord of the Admiralty, under whose instructions are the nation's real sentinels, holds the proudest position a man could desire. When the time arrives that England may be called upon to display her might, to what quarter will she first look ? is it not to see that our fleet are bullet and sea-proof ? I cannot complete my trip to Turkey without referring to our French neighbours, among whom I passed many pleasant hours at Con- stantinople and who always received me and my comrades in the most friendly manner ; indeed the warm friendship which continued to exist between French and English in that foreign clime cannot or should not be easily broken. In the field of battle they marched like brothers side by side, and for the one cause, thoughtless of consequences, led by their enthusiasm swept on through the shrieks of the dying, booming of artillery, and piercing of sabres, until grim death embraced them in his folds. It is the interest of the one as much as the other to OUR FLEET AT SEA. 183 uphold that friendship. There may be an occasional dispute or misunderstanding between the two governments or peoples — it cannot be avoided; where is the family that occasional bickerings do not exist among some of its members ? but when the breeze of excitement blows over, they can then see how disadvan- tageous and disagreeable might have been the consequences to both had they resorted to blows. It would be an unfortunate moment for both countries, that is for the industrious portion of them, should they hoist the banners of opposition and try to lower them with a Whitworth or Armstrong messenger, while hand in hand, they can, if inclined, and by keeping jealousy out of view, sail very smoothly together. We must bear in mind that Governments cannot act with that hasty impulse which animates their subjects, nor is it right they should, as at times the flood of popular excitement might drift them into use- less and endless difficulties. It is my earnest desire to see the two Governments and people continue as they now seem to be, on the most friendly footing; but should any unforeseen cir- cumstance occur by which the honour of both 184 OUR FLEET AT SEA. was compromised, and which caused them to have to test each other s strength, then let them by all means turn up their sleeves, have a good set-to, then shake hands, and have no more about it ; but I hope the time is far distant when a physical remedy shall have to be applied in settling any dispute between them. Poor Turkey ! you should see her fleet ; they remind one of a Dutchman's canoe. As I am once more at Turkey, permit me to inform the play-going or pleasure-seeking portion of you, that at Constantinople there are no places of amusement, except one or two gardens, where bands of music daily play, and the Italian Opera at Para, which is opened on Sunday as well as other days. There are no theatres or concert rooms; — you would have no chance of beholding the drowning of a Colleen Bawn, or the sale of an Octoroon, nor could you indulge in a peep at a Madame Tussauds or Polytechnic. There is no Rotten Row or Kensington Gardens, — how dis- agreeable the word Rotten Row sounds, and how miscalled ! Beauty's Row, or Venus's Promenade would be far more applicable, as in no place in the world is the bevy of beauty and grandeur OUR FLEET AT SEA. 185 to be seen, than on a midsummer s day at that uncouth-named place called Rotten Row. There a person, be he ever so humble, may behold beauty in its fullest perfection. It is not hid or disfigured by the disgusting presence of a white handkerchief bound round the face. There a lady may smile, nod, or converse with whom she thinks proper, and not on her return home be afraid that by so doing she will be condemned to the black hole. How sweet, yet just are such privileges ! Still, if one might judge from the occasional paragraphs of puppyism which appear in certain journals, you might be inclined to think that had fops their way, the etiquettes and costumes of our ladies should be arranged ac- cording to their taste. It is evident from the occasional uncalled-for remarks from a certain class of croakers or briefless practitioners, that they would, if they could, subject our ladies to the same disagreeable and slavish habits which unfortunately Turkish women must submit to. This fraternity of hen-pecked husbands, croaker brothers, or briefless aspirants, appears to be dreadfully alarmed at the sight of crinolines, red stockings, or pretty ankles, while at the same 186 OUR FLEET AT SEA. time when having their own garments arranged, it is woe -be to the poor tailor who stints them either in soldier's fat about the shoulders, or ex- tensives from the hips to the ankles. I am glad that ladies exercise their just right in adopting whatever kind of costume they choose. Men do not consult them when about to give orders for pegtops ; then I cannot see on what right of authority they dispute the taste of their fair friends or acquaintances. Perhaps some of them would like to behold ladies trudging through the streets with blindfolded visages, loose wrappers, loose slippers, and no stockings, which is the ordinary costume of Turkish women. By being so arrayed, jealous or bashful individuals might not be under the disagreeable necessity of having them so much admired, and could the more strongly assert their right of being the all-powei% ful lords of the creation. Woman was never ordained to be the crouching slave of man. These petty and self-opiniated critics who in- dulge in ridiculous and doating remarks, had better get to Turkey, where their wishes may be complied with, and they fully permitted to wear the breeches, But from Turkish laws, Turkish BROWN, JONES, AND KOBINSON AT HOME. 187 habits, and Turkish trips, I am most glad to be delivered. BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. After landing at the London Docks, when the Custom-house searchers had rigidly discharged their duty, it claimed all their attention to see to their luggage, or else crimps or the many other eaves-dropping sprites who infest the neighbour- hood of Ratcliffe-highway would cause them to disappear ; having attended to that necessary duty, they on having a parting glass agreed if distance separated them, to keep up a paper correspondence. As Jones and Robinson belong to that numerous class who would sooner do anything than sit down to write, I will not trou- ble you with any of their epistles ; but Brown being one of those who can make himself as content while inditing a rigmarole as otherwise, I will give you a few specimens of his penman- ship. Jones and Robinson having resided near 188 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. each other, he made the one letter do for both. His first was about Miss Nightingale and the presentation of rifle bugles — it ran as follows ; — [Letter No, L] Brown to Jones and Robinson. My Dear Old Comrades, As merry old Christmas, with its many merry- making festivities, has departed, and as we find ourselves once more launched upon the uncertain pilgrimage of another year, it may not be out of season to make a few observations with regard to the past. At this time last year none of us even dreamed of beholding the sponta- neous organisation of so formidable an auxiliary to our army as the Eifle Corps now assuredly is ; and which every patriotic individual should wish to see continued, because it not only embues its members with military ardour and healthful recreation, but shows other nations that England's sons are prepared, if circumstances needed them, to unite in defending their homes and their honour. But although highly as I admire the efficiency, &c. of our rifle forces, I cannot say I agree with all the chirruping which is made manifest on some occasions at the presentation of rifle bugles. The ladies who present these instruments, and the gallant gentle- men to whom they are presented, display such musical and, may I add, flattering sentiments, that when the time arrives, if ever, for buglers to sound the alarm, these instruments being so impressed with the endearing sentiments of their presentation ceremonies, can scarcely be expected to sound the shrill notes of warfare. It is I admit, a pleasing sight to behold a delicate hand pre- senting a nicely-manufactured bugle, while at the same BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 189 time its fair donor is eloquently, nay, even poetically assured that when its shrill notes shall summon them to battle, even then its fair subscribers shall be foremost in their memory. The ladies of England have done much to strengthen the rifle cause ; their patriotic exhor- tations and kind presentations cannot be too highly appreciated. It is well known that woman's influence is boundless : therefore I am much pleased to notice, with earnestness, they have adopted the Rifle cause, but as I before mentioned, I do not hold with so much oratorical parading as is displayed on some occasions — look, for example, to the speech of one gallant captain on receiving a silver bugle for his regiment. The lady who presented it, although courtesy compelled her to listen, is, I am satisfied, too sensitive not to perceive that all the ingredients of which that extra dose of flattery was composed could not be genuine. These are some of its rich ingredients: "Next the Queen on the throne there is no lady in the land from whom we should con sider it a greater privilege to receive this gift Your name is known throughout the length and breadth of the empire, and where known it is loved and honoured." This is all very well, captain. A great many may know, and I assure you no one more freely admits than I do, that the object of your praise is a good and charitable lady ; but there is at least one other as good, as charit- able, and should be as clearly loved and honoured, and, with all due respect to other ladies, should if any prefer- ence were made, be placed next the Queen on the throne. This lady is Miss Florence Nightingale. Other ladies may build churches, and patronise humane insti- tutions ; they have the means ; a dip of their pen at their own firesides or in their drawing-room depart- ments, will arrange these matters. But would they leave the comforts of their home and assume the duties of nurse in a Scutari or Crimean hospital ? How would 190 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. they like, at dead of night, when all others except the wounded and dying were enjoying an undisturbed re- pose, to traverse the long, dark, and lonely corridors of a Scutari hospital in search of wards where dying sol- diers required their aid ? Miss Nightingale's kind deeds are, or at least should be, so familiar with all, that I do not think fresh testimony is needed to show that no lady in the land, no matter what may be the length of her purse or pedigree, is entitled to rank before her in the people's estimation. Could the graves around Scutari or the Crimea give up their dead, the brave, though now almost forgotten, who are smouldering in that far-off clime, would hasten to render their profound thanks to her who in the hour of their tribulation forsook them not. Although Miss Nightingale courts neither the flattery or parading which seem to so highly delight others, still I think it is neglectful of her once-admirers to calmly permit these others to be by certain gallant gentlemen placed on that pinnacle in the people's estimation which alone belongs to her— at least while she is among us, as, if rumour be correct, and I fear in this instance it is too true, she is now severely though silently suffering from the effects of her unceasing exertions and attention to those who needed it in a foreign land. We should bear in mind that only a few years have elapsed since British valour was valiantly displayed, and British honour nobly upheld at the Crimea ; and that when the tempest of war most furiously swept through our ranks, Florence Nightingale was ever at hand to render assistance. She heeded not the dangers around her ; her only anxiety was for the welfare of others. Other ladies may be good, charitable, and dearly loved by certain gallant gentlemen, but these are not sufficient reasons why these gallants should, in the height of their quixotical addresses, place them next the Queen on the throne in preference to Miss Nightingale, whose kind- BU0WN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 191 ness and sisterly example inspired a feeling of gratitude even among the unthinking Turks, which, if we may judge from their expressions of regret at her departure, will not soon be forgotten. I fancy I hear a Turk at dusk of eve, as he gazes upon the gloomy exterior of Scutari hospital, utter something like the following : — In the stillness of eve, on Scutari's lone vale One may list now in vain for that sweet Nightingale, Whose voice I oft heard at midnight's dull hour, Lulling to rest both the wounded and sore ; Then where has she gone ? has she fled for repose To some rural valley where but very few knows ? Or has her fond melody, so oft 'mong us, flown, Been wafted away to her dear English home ? Be that as it may, I ne'er can forget How she soothed the dying and eased their regret ; No, though Turk as I am, I never shall fail To remember the kindness of Miss Nightingale. When her kindness is remembered with the warmest gratitude by the Turks, surely we, who boast of being her enlightened countrymen, cannot be altogether forgetful. Nor can we expect the generality of persons who have not experienced her kindness to so highly appreciate her worth as those who, like you and me, almost daily beheld her anxiety to render every comfort to those who needed it. I should not have touched on this topic, only for the fact of our ears being almost daily stormed with the trumpeting of praise bestowed on others who scarcely ever left their fireside or did any service except to present a silver bugle, while Miss Nightingale and the other ladies who accompanied her, and shared in her noble efforts to rendei' every assistance to our wounded and dying soldiers at the Crimea Would seem to be forgotten. Though I mention Miss 192 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. Nitghingale in particular, I do not mean to forget her kind companions, who are alike worthy of j)raise. But to follow our official mode of describing an engagement, &c, it is never deemed necessary to mention the merits of each individual, although all may have equally shared in the glory of victory. So with Miss Nightingale and her noble band of companions. As an army would be but of little use without a superior commander, the ladies who embarked on that merciful and hazardous mission required the skill and aid of that efficient directress. Hence it is that all of us who witnessed and experienced her kindness cannot refrain from looking with an eye of jealousy or disapproval on beholding persons try to almost forcibly place others before her in the people's estimation. Now my old friends, although I have indulged in a rather long rigmarole about Miss Nightingale, I assure you I would rather some person who was more competent to do justice to her kindness had undertaken the task; and although I have been rather plain in con- trasting her worth with that of others, still you must not imagine I try to disparage the worth of other ladies. Certainly not ; bless their little hearts, I like all of them, although when they want a bonnet, extra pair of boots, or a long milliner's bill discharged, they may appear naughty girls, still we cannot do without them ; our very existence is wrapped up in their keeping. But on the principle of justice, we must draw a line of demarcation between ordinary and extraordinary merits, This is all I have attempted to do. And now that I am satisfied I have inflicted severe punishment by claiming your attention while reading this long rigmarole, I remain, as usual, Your troublesome friend, Brown* BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 193 [Letter No. 2J Brown to Jones and Robinson. Dear Old Turkoes, Pimlico, I received yours of the 21st, and am sorry to hear that your progressive prospects are somewhat similar to my own, for as astrologers say, my planet just now is very much in the descendant ; but so long as it does not get in conjunction with Mars, it may not indicate a hopeless aspect. It is often better for one to continue stationary than move on the axles of skirmish- ing or opposition, besides, as it is an old remark that many a dark and dreary morning brings forth a bright and shiny day, perhaps our gloomy present may be turned into a brighter future, that is if those big planets who rule the destinies of the lesser ones will alter their opinion as to our merits, and not keep us too long in the background. At all events, it is no use fretting or grumbling; there is a good time coming boys; and when it does come, what matters though it has been a long time coming. This is a charming end of the town to reside in. By residing here one sees the most wonderful of sights ; you can behold strange -looking specimens of lords of the creation, from the Judge Advocate to the Barber's Clerk in their most dandified style. You can also perceive numerous assortments of Eve's representa- tives, from Maria the scullery maid to Georgiana Amelia Teresa, the serious-looking matron, who since the five- flounce petticoat has been baptised by Eugenie, glides along in full trim, carrying nearly as much canvas as a man-of-war's jolly boat. There is no end to the number of self-constituted gentlemen who infest this western hemisphere, whose incomes or salaries average from one to two hundred pounds a year — a few of them may have 194 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. a trifle more, and a great many much less. I need scarcely remind you that they are extensive purchasers of pegtops, eye-glasses, rings, flash guards, and all the other appendages of would-be respectability. It is laughable to see these specimens of gentility strut about the streets, with their hands in their empty pockets, penny cigars in their potatoe traps, bits of imperials on their upper lips, and with their " 'pon my honor, the clouds look heavy ; positively the weather has latterly been so awfully disagreeable^ that the parks are quite deserted, and the club rooms so crowded to excess that one is puzzled to know how to wile away one's time," — indeed it is amusing to behold these would-be imitations of gentlemen, who to prove they are respectable or respectably connected, contrive to procure apartments in some fashionable square, where a few days after their arrival a livery servant enquires if Master Joseph Henry Theophilus resides there. Johnny has scarcely de- parted, when a groom with a pair of horses, one for himself and one for Henry Theophilus, calls. Shortly after a carriage, with, of course, a regular retinue of servants, stops at the door ; the footman rings the visitors' bell. Its arrival is announced to Theophilus; he pretends to be much displeased at friends calling upon him without acquainting him of their intended visit. Still he must look over tbe present breach of etiquette, as on this occasion it turns out to be his dear Aunt, who, having just returned from her country seat, felt anxious to see him. I need scarcely remind you that after such respectable visits, Joseph Henry Theophilus had every attention lavished upon him ; his landlady remarked, and the servants echoed it, that he must be a thorough gentlemen, and highly connected. The fact of his aunt returning from her country seat, and calling upon him in the style of a duchess, proved his respectability and standing in society* When the matron and servants BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME, 195 had given their verdict in his favour, it was then the young misses' turn to pass their opinion. They agreed with Ma — that he must be a gentleman of no mean pretensions; but what about his Aunt, — was she a maiden lady, if so, there were brilliant prospects in store for him, and whoever he was destined to lead to the altar. They came to the conclusion that so far as they could judge from present appearances, he was en- titled to more attention and consideration than any bachelor acquaintance they knew of — indeed Teresa Louisa said it was a lucky star that directed him thither ; would it not be nice to have somebody to talk to after one's dinner, and to act as an escort when going to the opera, or it might be to have an occasional ride in Aunt's carriage. Theophilus lived like a prince in this fashionable square, was supplied as a matter of right with a key of the gardens, had a magnificent eye-glass which he used to perfection, was most polite to the lady promenaders whom he met in his walks — and as a matter of respectability, had a sitting in H — y Tr — y Church, and a season ticket for the Crystal Palace. But poor coxcomb, although he could cleverly imitate the fop, he sadly lacked of common or indeed any kind of sense, and to keep up his assumed respectability he procures a month's leave from his employers, must go to some fashionable watering place ; is rather short of money just then, his Aunt, as he said, not having sent him his usual remittance. His landlady supplies him with whatever he requires, but on his return from en- joying the sea breeze, things begin to assume a more gloomy aspect, the carriages or saddle horses not calling so frequently as they did after his first arrival, caused his landlady to one morning after breakfast rather gravely enquire if his Aunt was out of town, to which he replied, ce Oh yes, dear Aunt is on the Continent ; I expect the next Marseilles mail to bring me tidings of her speedy 0 196 BROWN j JONES, AND KOBINSON AT HOME. return." The matron pauses, then says, " well Sir, it appears very strange, your Aunt promised to let me have one hundred pounds by the 1st, it is now the 20th, and she on the Continent." Joseph looks rather blue, he sees that Hookey "Walker must soon be his name ; but how is he to get away the many pairs of new boots, pegtops, and numerous other materials, which upon the strength of his Aunt's respectability, foolish tradespeople did not hesitate to supply him with. How to get these tally articles away for a time puzzled him ; but he soon thought of a plan by which he suc- cessfully carried out his idea, left his landlady in the lurch, and caused the young Misses to be more reserved before they pronounce flash-looking folks to be perfect gentlemen. Many of these idle swindlers are the kind of persons who in parks and other fashionable resorts, by cutting a dandyfied dash, attract the attention of — Oh no, I must not mention them ; — but who, if a person because he did not happen to be fashionably attired, should dare look at them, they could almost freeze him with their frowns. Such is the way in our present days ; but in the good old times of yore it was quite the reverse, a man was a man just the same then, and as much thought of, when dressed in corduroy, buckskin, or frieze, as in broad-cloth ; but now-a-days the making of a man is to a great extent confined to the cut or quality of his gar- ments. Yet I cannot see much consequence to be attached to the occupying of pegtop pantaloons, except one can furnish their extensive pockets with that respect- able commodity called golden guineas. If persons, by industry, their abilities, or lawful means, possess that nice and best of friends, a long purse, then by all means let them patronise whatever style they please. They can afford to do so without injuring others ; they have a right to follow their inclination in whatever manner BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 197 they please. To these persons I have nothing to say. I look with pleasure as they rest on the oars of indepen- dence; they are some of the bright, because privileged specks which appear on the surface of our creation ; but those shy-strikes or would-if-they-could-but-they-can't folks, should be rooted out of every locality, until by keeping them moving they were brought to their senses. I know it is a source of great gratification to any one to think that he is somebody ; aye, and to let people know he has authority. Poor fellow ! he forgets that if he would but look back only a short time hence, and see from what he sprang, it would frighten him out of any sense he might possess. But it is no use preaching. It matters little whether he be a perfect|blockhead or not, so that he cultivates a moustache, and in outward appearance resembles a gentleman, he is admitted into genteel society, until, like Joseph Henry Theophilus, he happens to be found out. I am surprised that sensible people cannot detect the assumed airs of these self- constituted gents, and turn their backs upon them. Although but a simple individual, who scarcely ever mixed among refined society, still I can with a glance distinguish a lady or gentleman from these shy-strikes ; the cut of their jib, their gait when walking, or ideas when talking, will tell upon them. I will for the present let them waddle through the mire of their consequence, but shall at some future time paint some of them in their true colours, with their pedigree as a tincture or colouring to show off their perfection. I almost forgot to tell you that the horses, carriages, and livery servants which waited upon Joseph Henry Theophilus, were hired, and the person who represented his aunt was some known acquaintance with whom he no doubt had to share some of the profit derived from his stay in the square — as profit he must have had ; it cost nothing for his keep, he daily borrowed money from his landlady, 0 2 198 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. and the house was constantly besieged by jewellers, tailors, and other tradespeople soliciting orders, as his landlady was a most respectable and respected person, she having resided for many years in the locality, and was in easy circumstances. She did not require to take in a single man lodger as a pecuniary aid, but being a widow lady and her two daughters most of their time away at a boarding school, felt rather lonely, and having a strong recommendation with Joseph Henry, as to his morality and religious turn of mind, thought his pre- sence would make her dwelling appear homely. Besides Adelaide was getting out of her teens, quite time to leave a boarding school and become domesticated. Here was an opportunity for Joseph Henry, had but his pocket allowed him occasionally to order a carriage and retinue of livery servants to accompany his Haymarket aunt to his lodgings. But no, alas! the aunt required more for her official visits than he could continue to give her, and so he went where all puppies are sure to go — to the dogs. If you are good lads, and promise me you can stand the operation, I will, when you next call to see me, have you transformed into gentlemen. We will have a ride in a coach, it wont cost much; and oh ! wont we cut a swell. But mind, you must bring plenty of small silver with you, such as three and four-penny pieces, you know poor folks will be surrounding our carriage windows, and we must act the gentleman by pretending to be charitable ; and as gentlemen do no not carry copper, we must follow their example; and as charity begins at home, I am resolved to leave you to demon- strate our gentility at your own expense. Nor can you grumble for being on this occasion liberal, knowing that it will convert vou into gentlemen. I know some folks who regularly go to church except when a charity or some such sermon is about to be preached — but on these BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 199 occasions the pew-openers allow the first comers to occupy their sittings, well knowing that their owners will be absentees. There is another class of persons, Who although they don't like to shell out the rhino, wish to keep up their respectability by not causing folks to notice their absence. These half-and-half respectables gather all the small silver coins they possibly can on a Saturday night, to be prepared for Sunday morning, and with a little offering make themselves appear big people. You must follow their example on this occasion, and like good fellows, get a pair of bellows, blow off the smoke and other noxious East-end vapours. As you are so anxious to receive long letters, I hardly know if this is long enough ; if not, let me know, and my next shall be longer. Yours as usual, Brown, --eS^?^$^^W- Letter No* 3* From Brown to Jones and Robinson. Dear Friends, With regard to your kind enquiries concerning my health, &c, I am happy to have to inform you that I am quite well, and never was in better spirits, which is to a great extent accelerated by the fact of perceiving a lady who strongly resembles Belinda. And when I assure you that this lady is in every respect a perfect prototype of Belinda, it is, without any exaggeration, certifying that she cannot, as regards amiability and per- fection, be surpassed in the metropolis. On first behold- ing her, surprise took such strong possession of me that for a considerable time I remained motionless ; nor could I, until she entered her dwelling, believe but it was 200 BKOWN, JONES, AND KOBLNSON AT HOME. Belinda ; even then I many times passed and repassed her windows, trying to get a glimpse at her, until I began to fear she might notice my attention and deem it rudeness. But it was not rudeness ; I could not be rude to one who so strongly resembles her whom I had with regret to leave a pining prisoner in the Old Seraglio. Close to her dwelling is a nicely cultivated garden, where other ladies occasionally promenade, some of whom, it is said, possess more than an ordinary share of beauty and gracefulness. But when she who resembles Belinda is in view, the fairest of them are to her only as rushlights are to candles. You should see her when either on foot or horseback ; there is something so commanding and graceful about her movement, which would at once con- vince you that she required no artificial remedies to complete her perfection. Now a few words about Turkey. Although we are once more among smiling faces and familiar friends or ac- quaintances, we must not forget the many dreary hours we passed at Constantinople. Perhaps you may say it is unwise to encumber one's mind with the gloomy thoughts of the past. I do not think so — for this reason, that if we accustom ourselves^to only keep in view the bright visions of our pleasures, when a dark figure presents itself we are almost frightened to death. We are not accustomed to behold such a ghastly object, we cannot bear its presence ; yet the fact is that we must, we cannot help ourselves. Every dog has his day; we had ours of sunshine, we must also expect a little storm. You may say, "Well, but we are now away from Turkey and the Turks, why trouble ourselves about them? let us bask in contentment." Not a bit of it. Our eyes must occasionally direct their gaze across the Mediterranean, and see if there is any alteration about to be made for the better among the inhabitants of Turkey. We have a right to look with a wistful eye BROWN j JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 20l towards them, or why go to their assistance, or leave the bones of thousands of our countrymen scattered over their wild mountains. Yes, we have a right to see that a little progress be made among them with regard to a reform in their system of laws and religious freedom. We want to see the Christians w r ho reside among them placed, if not on an equality, at least a little more in advance to what they now are. And we want to see some kind of security or protection afforded to those whose inclination leads them to relinquish Mahomedanism for Christianity ; we want to see every ship which leaves our shores for the East, take one or more missionaries who, being armed with gospel truth and determination, would try to win the Turks from the baneful influence of Mahomedanism. Turkey offers many more favourable advantages for the success of missionaries than other heathen countries. It is already to a tolerable extent Christianized ; the Arme- nians are staunch in their belief of Christianity, but they must not offer any inducement to their Mussulman neighbours to leave the path of belief which the Koran points out for them. The Armenians are too closely watched and the penalty so severe if found to tamper with any follower of Mahomed, that they cannot, they dare not, venture to impress them with Christian prin- ciples. But were a well-organised staff of missionaries, say of different denominations, to proceed from this country, when under the mantle of England they would be treated with a thousand times more consideration than if they were natives of Turkey. There may be a few missionaries there already, but these few are insuf- ficient ; there is something required beside scripture- reading. A small portion of sugar gives tea a nice flavour. For missionaries to proceed there and merely distribute tracts, and occasionally converse with the inhabitants, would have no more effect than the barking 202 BKOWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. of a dog. They must, to become successful, administer an occasional dose of kindness in the shape of piasters. An empty belly is, in my opinion, too cold a repository for spiritual consolation to find a permanent dwelling- place in it. The Turks are very temperate, so that missionaries would not have to encounter the obscene revelries or bravo opposition of brawling drunkards which they might often meet at home. Beside their mission to Turkey would be a noble undertaking; it was from that land of the East that the light of redemp- tion first shone upon us, and although missionaries may be of different denominations, they should manifest Christian example and forbearance towards each other, by meeting as friends and fellow-labourers, instead of passing each other with a cool nod or it's a fine morning. Let them imitate our rural clergymen. I once knew a parson and priest who dined and supped together at least twice a-week, and after dinner smoked their pipes and talked of politics ; but when Sunday came they abused each other most dreadfully, which pleased their congregations and supplied them with fresh gossip after their nest dinner. Do you think these two rural soul- savers were a bit worse men than those who, when they meet each other in the street, hold down their heads ? decidedly not — they were jolly old chaps, and as care- ful shepherds as ever watched over a congregation of Protestants or Catholics ; by all means let each mis- sionary gather as many sheep into his fold as he possibly can, but let him also bear in mind that so long as they can be taken off the scorching pasture of Mahomedanism and placed within the pale of Christianity, it is not of so much consequence to which congregation they belong, they are free from the trammels of Koran superstition and blasphemy. But enough, I must conclude, or you will fancy I have turned Methodist preacher. You express anxiety BK0WN, JONES, AND EOBINSON AT HOME. 203 to see a copy of some of Belinda's letters. Well as you are curious old fellows, I will if you have a little patience, for the sake of old acquaintance, let you see our full correspondence, because it contains nothing which might cause us to feel timid in allowing the eye of curiosity to gaze upon it. Did it contain but half a syllable which in the slightest manner might affect the honour of her who is now far away, rest assured that no eye but my own should ever behold it ; but as it does not, I will at some future time satisfy your curiosity, and I am satisfied you will be surprised at the pretty and poet- ical style in which Belinda's letters are couched. She is as clever a little nymph with the pen as she is command- ing and fascinating in person. I cannot promise as to the precise time I will let you see our correspondence, as well as an account of the intrigues of other parties of which you have no idea ; it will constitute a portion of a book or pamphlet. You may laugh at the idea of your humble servant attempting to write a book ; I assure you I can as successfully fill a book with nonsense as many other writers. Are you not aware that any aspirant who can command forty or fifty pounds, may have his name paraded as an author ? and what matters to him whether in his case the old proverb be fully verified, that a fool and his money soon parts, so long as he indulges in his gratification. I remain as usual, Yours truly, Brown. 204 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. [Letter No. 4.] From Brown to Jones and Kobinson. Dear Old Friends, As these are times of such progressive achiev- ments and constitutional alterations, that the King of to-day is often the exile of to-morrow, and as the voice of liberty is fearlessly echoed in almost every other land, let us while gladly hailing such welcome tidings, ask why there is no such cheering voice in Turkey. How is it that the old putrified atmosphere of no advance still hovers around the portals of its political horizon — or how is it that closed doors and secure windows are still the only reporters or sentinels permitted to watch over or report upon the decision of its councils? Shall I tell you? it is because there is no freedom of speech or a free press allowed to reign where Mahomed- anism rules — they could not agree, their ideas are too much opposed to each other. Mahomedanism requires the shield of secrecy to cover its dark mysteries. That talkative boy, called Liberty, if once allowed to speak, might get prattling so much about what he saw, and so open people's eyes to the cause of their degradation and misery, that he must either keep his tongue still, or with a silken cord adjusted round his neck, or a sack thrown over his head, be sent down among the dead men ; poor little fellow, methinks I see him as the big fishes gather around him, with a calm dignified countenance, shouting " Better by far to be thus treated than through a life of bondage have to silently witness my countrys* anguish. They have done their worst — they stopped my tongue by depriving me of life, but my last words shall be liberty, and away with the manacles of tyranny ! I go to my forefathers where no tyrants reign." Poor little BROWN j JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 205 fellow, I could almost shed tears for him, he was so young, so good and generous ; but as kind souls are mostly called away while worthless ones are allowed to remain, let us as a homage to their memory remember their last words and try to follow them. Turkey is not yet past the power of redemption. Our own and all other nations were at some time overshadowed by dark clouds, the beacon of freedom did not always so bril- liantly shine over our own land as it now does ; we had dark days at home, as well as others now have them abroad. And how have they become bright ? or why is England at this moment the most enviable, because the most free and enlightened nation in the world? It is because she has a free press, and allows everyone to think as he feels inclined upon religious matters. The beauty of England's grandeur, and the existence of that beauty, is in the liberty of the press ; the press is the engine which keeps her greatness in motion. Were the working of that powerful engine to cease, her grandeur would become eclipsed, and her people lose that instinct or power which spurs them to enterprise and independence. No one so long as right is at his side need lack the means of redress, or want of righting his wrongs, as he has in the editor of a newspaper the best advocate he could employ, who would in his editorial remarks enlist public sympathy on their behalf, which if once thoroughly enlisted, will, like the waves of a troubled ocean, lash most disagreeably against those who deserve their rebuke. From an editor's study the morning and evening post carries tidings to every home- stead ; the proceedings of the cabinet council, or discussions in both Houses of Parliament, are as freely and fearlessly criticised by him as are the Divorce Court proceedings by Sir Cresswell Cresswell. He has not to bandy his words to please this or that personage ; although he must of course shape them according to the 206 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. interest of whatever political party he represents. When retiring for repose his thoughts need not be disturbed by the fear of a picquet of soldiers calling upon him, and of a cold winter's night drag him from his bed and in a state of nudity lodge him in some underground apartment for the night, from whence he is in the morning in a half- frozen state, brought before a Sultan to account for why he dared to mention such and such matters ; and if he could not, which it would be impossible for him under such circumstances, satisfy his Majesty as to his right of authority in attempting to meddle with constitutional privileges, the august announcement of " Away with him" falls upon his ear like the knell of a prison bell when chiming the last hour of a culprit's existence. He well knows that Away with him signifies he is destined to no more wield an editor's pen. People may talk as they like about editors, their abilities, &c, and many self- opiniated individuals may fancy they could cleverly discharge an editor's duty. They forget that to be an editor of a respectable paper, which directs any political party, he must not only be a man of learning, but a thorough man of the world ; he must be able to direct the barque of his party how to best steer its course through the ruffled waves of opposition ; and he must, when that barque is successfully gliding over the smooth waters of victory, by acting as a skilful pilot, keep its crew together ; and by pointing out the way to unity, continue to keep them from drifting upon the sands of dissension, where if once their barque got stranded, though he were ever so experienced a mariner, he could scarcely save it from foundering. Who by the effects of his sarcasm can so effectively bring bounceable people to their senses, or so disagreeably touch their corns ; who by his appeal to the benevolent, can dry the widow or orphan's tear; or when any dreadful calamity occurs, induce persons to open their purse-strings and BROWN/ JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 207 throw oil upon the troubled waters ; or who either raises a man from obscurity or condemns him to oblivion. It is well known that many of our past and present eminent statesmen, lawyers, and writers, are or were indebted to the press for their success; while others who were quite as clever, but because they did not happen to sail under the same tack, sunk into forge tfulnesss. Let us in England bless our stars that if w orthy we can have the aid of such a powerful agency. Would that Turkey could possess such a staff. Were the freedom of the press allowed to reign in its dominions, and editors permitted to advise, direct, and oppose as they do here, in a short time Turkey would be entitled to rank as a second-class nation. Cannot some remedy be applied to try to have freedom of speech or freedom of the press established there ? Why not some of those millionaires who have long purses and are inclined to do good for their fellow-men, expend a trifle in trying to get the light of liberty to shine in other countries as it appears at home ? by aiding in such a noble cause they would be blessed by future generations. It is all very well for those who are in possession of the loaves and fishes, to stick to them like leeches, but why should millions be made to mourn for the sake of a few ? If old laws and customs cannot be made consonant with present feelings and the progress of the times, condemn them as obsolete; and if their framers or keepers will not sensibly consent to have them altered, send them about their business ; better one or two should sink than have a whole nation crawling upon the surf of misery. If the advisers at the Sublime Porte woidd but establish a free press, allow reporters to attend their council and other meetings, and without fear of forfeiting their lives, to faithfully report their proceedings, and let people know how financial and other matters stood, and permit editors to expose patronage, jobbing, and such disgraceful pro- 208 BROWN, JONES, AND ROBINSON AT HOME. 3 7 ceedings, I'll lay my head that the freedom of the press would speedily work the salvation of that beautiful though benighted country. Trusting this rigmarole is long enough, With best wishes, I remain as usual, Your troublesome friend, Brown. THE END. \ I