ANNA DICKINSON
GENERAL CORRESPONDENCE
Austin, S.F. [1865-1875 + undated]Milwaukee Nov 12th'/65
Sweet Annie Dickinson - You dear ridiculous 
child. The pleasant words you sent 
us by Mrs. Marble were made still more 
agreeable by that sweet woman's rendering 
of them, and her loving appreciation of you.  
I shall always regard any woman as a 
sister of the higher birth, who loves and 
understands you - as we do.  It was very 
pleasant, through such a medium to hear 
of your doings and sayings, altho' it needed 
not that, to call you up in breathing 
personality to my mind.  I have but to 
shut my eyes, to see you any time, for you 
are more a real living presence to me than 
many persons I see every day.  I am so 
sorry for the poor lame foot, dear.  
It was very naughty 
of you not to write us before - we looked 
and wondered, and scolded, ie, I did -
my lord is less exacting than his 
spouse - that you should fail to reply 
to any letter I might write you, does not 
seem at all strange - but his letters are 
always worthy reply.  His best and noblestutterances have been given to two or three
dear souls, who add so much to the
beauty and richness of my life, in
friendly letters.  I am not a bit jealous
you see - his letters to me are best of all,
but I am not going to have you slight 
his letters, my dear.  I shall resent that.
What has become of that fair season
you spent by our fireside?  And did 
it mean something, or nothing, that
we should all have met so freely, and
pass hours so happily together, with you
and the dear Metcalfs.  I would fain think
the end is not yet.  The pure wine of life
was offered us, and we drank of it not 
carelessly - as it seemed to me, then, as 
now - but in token of a new friendship
I believe that many of the simple things
of life came to us clad in eucharistic
meanings; and where people love each
other truly, and unselfishly, they will
find much of heaven in "life's dusty
ways."
     I wonder where you are today, &
what doing.  I wonder if you are resting
as you should - sleeping perhaps - of if
you are staying somewhere, where you

can have better rest than mere sleep -
beautiful thoughts, beautiful music
and beautiful human love, to fill up
the life half exhausted for others.  I
wonder if you have grown wiser, and
learned to to take better ease of yourself,
or if you still give some people who
love you heartaches on your account because
of your recklessness.  I wonder if you are just
as arch as ever, and have just such a 
way of looking people over. Bring thy-
self hither to us that I may see. And
just here, let me say that you must arrange 
to stay here longer than one or two
days. You promised so to do- & I fully 
expect you to keep your word. It is
eminently suitable, and proper, that 
you show yourself benevolent enough, to
shed some flowers in the path of those
dear Metcalf people, who love you so well.
and who, of all others here who looked 
upon you, are the only ones who understand
and appreciate the moving forces of your
life, in the least. 
I have nothing to tell you 
of myself I have just wrought, and read
and studied as usual. I enjoyed June'sroses and Oct's painted leaves, and then
was desperately sick a whole month. I
plod along lamenting the exceeding
poverty of my nature, which so seldom
lifts itself from the earth. Ah my dear!
why were some of us born dumb? To
think of having others say all the beautiful
things for us, when it would be such great
happiness to say them for ourselves. If there
be a land, where the blind see, shall we not
all there find the sweet gift of utterance? I
had for visitors this summer, some delightful 
people from your city Mr & Mrs Heuges. Somehow
I must bring you face to face with my friends
there, if I have to go on there to do it. One
thing more dear child if you go to Pitsfield
Mass: do not fail to see the Richards there 
Go for my sake. And I promise you will be 
glad. Mrs R. is sister to Alice C Aral, of whom
you must have known a great deal, during
her life time- and is equally gifted. Mr R is
delightful beyond telling, he is a clergyman 
and I dont know if he likes you, I only know
he will if he sees you. Any way you just go.
Mr Colfax lectured here last week. I was 
greatly disappointed in him, he did not interest 
me, and there is none of the refinement of 

presence and manners I expected to see
You know dear- how happy we would 
be to hear from you, but we also know
how little time you must have for letter
writing. Only tell us when you are coming
and I will be satisfied. If you read this
in Mrs. Marble's house, just give her and 
Miss Anna a good hug for me. 
Dear child we long
for you very much, and shall 'till some
of us disappear into the light beyond 
life. 'till then- "Through all the 
vicissitudes". I am your friend,
Sallie Austin
Miss Anna E Dickinson
The above, was written to send you by
Mrs Marble in the hope, it would
reach you sooner that way, than by
any other. Since - I have read in the 
papers that you are ill, and at home
I trust you are not seriously sick, but
am very anxious about you. Are you 
able to write us a word,  or will some
body do it for you? Do let us hear
something, through some other channelthan the newspapers. I shall wait in 
in much tribulation to know something
more definite. 
S. F. A.

Milwaukee March 23rd 1./66
My dear friend
The head of the house is 
writing you a letter today, which will
probably leave you nothing more to desire
in that way from the same family, but
nevertheless I do so much desire to utter
myself anew to you, and having somewhat 
to say I am going to find you a scrawl, despite
of such discouragements as two sick children
and congruent weariness and pre-occupation
It was a rude awakening from the delirium of
enjoyment your presence brought us, the subtil
life spirit which you evoked to the anxiety
and care of children sick with measles, there 
is no poetry about the disease, my dear.
I have a sort of undefined impression that all
luxuries must be, in some way, the reward of
their own merits and this conclusion is adapted
to render you still more valuable, in comparison
with the life we have led since you were here -
No matter - I have got over you to some extent
and I shall very soon become as interested
in the manufacture of petticoats and drawers

[*Anna, I trust you know all such imperfect words and thoughts fail to 
tell you, and how much of a house hold word your name has become to you us . In
return for this hurried epistle I should like your autograph, on a blank sheet
of paper something
where by, we
might know 
you are alive
You see how meek
I am you bad
child. Dont think 
of writing us 
a letter. We
should not
know what to
do with it. 
I kiss you 
a thousand
times. My
dear love. 
Good night
S. F. Austin.*]for the little folks, as if you had never been 
here. I have talked you over several times
with dear, precious Mrs. Metcalf always with 
great satisfaction to ourselves. I believe 
the study and analysis of such an organism 
as yours, is full of interest to those who possess the 
key to your contradictions, as we do, you know
my dear child. but with others, who know 
you not, and would not know if they were 
told, there is little pleasure in discussing 
you. We have all had much anxiety on 
your account lest you should be ill again
We saw by the papers, that you did not 
dawn upon the Chicago vision, until 9 
oclock. I suppose you were sick - how was it 
dear, and how have you fared since. 
I shall be glad when the lecture season 
is over, and you go home to rest, and recruit 
I wish you could lie down and fall
asleep in another's consciousness, and give
your panting, quivering vitality a
little rest. As Mrs Metcalf says, of you, "how
one wishes to shield and protect her
from everything rough, coarse and unlovely!
and how ones heart aches, because they can
do nothing, except to leave her to fulfill
her destiny as God pleases" You are not
a strong minded woman, dear child,
[*I will send you a note of introduction to Miss Blake, after you go home, this
has been written in the intervals of giving medicine. I doubt if you can read it*]

you are no type of such, no successful
advocate for such, you are only a true
tender loving little girl, over whom such
weak people as Mr Metcalf, Dr [?], and Mr
Austin go nearly crazy - while Mrs Metcalf
and myself, from our sublime heights of
strength and wisdom, are very moderate
in our estimate of you. However for your encouragement
I think we are just to you, we 'dont think
you are likely to be spoiled, by such
attentions, we think it is only in shallow
natures, that much devotion from the
other sex produces vanity, where the tone
of character is pure and high, women become
more and more worthy of the sentiments they
inspire  We had a very pleasant evening
shortly after you left, at Mrs Clarks, which
you would have enjoyed. It is always pleasant
there, and Miss Clark was most interesting
and chatty over her portfolio of Italian
studies. I am sure you will love dear, very
much, when you once get at her. I am entrusted
with a message to you, from her, which is the
chief excuse I have for this infliction,
"Tell Miss D. I expect to see her at Newport
Will she let me know as soon as she comes
there. I am very glad she wants to come
and see me" This is about what she saidShe lives in Washington St - and told
me the number, which I have forgotten. I
am so glad you are to have such a noble
acomplished woman for your friend. Anna
dear, I think it is "a feather in your cap,"
that Miss Clark quiet, undemonstrative
and critical, and somewhat past the age 
of enthusiasm, should so take to you. She
is just the person under whose wing, you can
securely look out upon Newport. Now darling 
you just be good, and lovely, and loving 
and not shock this new friend, by any 
"Bohemian" doings.
I saw Mrs. Metcalf today
I shall doubtless make you radiant by the 
information that Mr M. is going to New York 
with his wife - anyway I am glad he is going, 
not on your account my dear, but that same 
sweet wife will be a deal happier, having him 
with her.  They are a couple. Lizzie Blake 
calls people, humans in general, she calls 
machines.  I enclose you a scrap from Lizzie 
Blake in which she speaks of you.
Just here Mr. Austin rushes in with the announce-
ment that he must start for Madison in half an 
hour.  Mrs. [Hubbell?] whom you saw at Fon du lac, had 
a fit of apoplexy this morning, and is barely alive.  
Mr A. goes to Madison to take the place of the Judge 
in some matter.  His letter to you is not finished, but 
perhaps he will return in time, to have it reach you 
before you leave St. Louis.  All these words, and thoughts 
of mine are freighted with abundant love, dear.

Friday.  What a dismal day!  I make Pap stay in bed, 
for it is really too dark to read the newspaper.  He is depress-
ed at the death of his last old friend, Saml Badger - says 
"every body is gone," and don't eat.  Blanche tossed me a 
lemon out of window last eveng., to make "something cooling", 
as the 'mometer stood' at 70.  (A raging winter fire in the 'of-
fice' -)  I converted it into hot whiskey punch and then walk-
ed my Pa up and down the closed store until my legs gave 
out - he telling me of "Bob Ireland" (one of their village - 
boys who afterwards became the champion of Engd) 
and what a splendid football player he had made of my
old gentleman, who was his little pet - both his feet were 
right feet" - and that is the reason, I presume, he stands
 so firmly on his pedestals now at his advanced 
years! I go down like chaff, before him.Your wrapper won't last long - the trimming muslin is too 
sheer.  Only wait until I come to Milwaukee! we'll spend 
days in the woods with our work baskets and I'll do sets of 
linen, and things, for Juliet Biss, and you - even [?]
Sir Roberts drawers, so as they may look pretty when he lets
them peep out! a great stretch of goodness, on my part believing,
as I do, that all the evils of life came in with the
first man - poor maligned Madam Eve, notwithstanding
I want to hear of the surprise-party, and more of Anna
Dickinson - Poor child - if she does undertake me, how
her eyes will open and stare at my utter, un-"conventionalism." 
Edith declares Julia is going to have a baby!!!!
"there is always something in the face by which you can
tell."  Juli hoots at the charge, and poor Bunnie will only
be called in the future , granny or gossip.  I should have died
had it been true, as the prospect of perhaps losing one, or both! We
have had so many of these [horrors?]
    Beta 

Sweet Ms. Dickinson,
Mama said that she
would send my love to you but she
forgot it.  It seems to me that if I could
take you in my arms + kiss you
about or million of times + could
let you go but not until then.  For I think
that if I about have you right where I can
see you that you are in some danger
or something is happening to you.

From your loving
friend Julia Austin
P.S. You know Miss Dickinson you
promised to send me a sheet of paper
with your name on it + I shall
expect it.Milwaukee Dec 9th 1871.
119. Wisconsin Street
My Dearest Anna,
You have been 
to Chicago and gone. I have only the very 
pleasant report of your doings from one 
of the Editors of the Chicago Journal whom 
I met here a few evenings since. The 
telegram you promised me never came 
at least not to me, and it is for this that 
I write to tell you. I should have come to 
you had I received the expected summons 
I thought it possible Ms Doggett might 
have sent the dispatch, in which case it 
probably would not have been delivered to 
me, and I should never hear of it. How 
I did want to see you. I cannot think 
of my disappointment now, without a choke. 
You must have had rare pleasure meeting 
the Doggetts again. I thought of youconstantly, that Sunday, and almost 
envied you the pleasure of gathering up
the broken threads. It was not for me
to sun myself in your presence, and have 
the burden lifted from my weary heart 
and brain even for a few hours.  I am
so sorry for my loss. I could not have
deserved it and must be patient.
When you have the time will you tell
me where your friend Price of the 
Tribune may be addressed. I may
have something to say to him before long.
Julia is translating a lovely book from the German, "Funken unter der Aschen"
(Cinders under the ashes,) and is doing
it so well, the author has written her a 
letter, expressing his pleasure that he should be "so gracefully rendered into English." I will have to revise the translation
as Julie does not always get the best 
word, but in the whole she translates 
better than most people. Do you think

I might venture to ask the advice of your friend about publishing
the book, even ask him to negotiate for the same. Should the 
book be as promising as I hope, I expect some chapters in the 
next [?] days and can then judge. She[?] speaks of you in
almost every letter. I do so hope you will go there, before very long
What about your European plan. I want to know is I wish I
could be in it somewhere. I want to ask you just a thousand
things which I cannot write. Are you coming west again
this winter? Any where in my orbit. I have no idea where
you are now. I heard of you in Grand Rapids. We lost all
trace of you after Detroit. With your usual luck, I expected 
the bitter cold weather we have had would find you upon 
the prairies in Illinois. where you would have reaped yourusual harvest of personal ill. Every body
says your new lecture is "splendid" I
wish I could hear it I do not know if
we are to have any lectures here this winter
probably not. there is not public spirit
enough in the town to secure them, or attend
them - if they should be furnished us
I forgot to tell you Mrs Pickards was
 in Milwaukee the first part of the winter
she speaks of you with warmest admiration
and begs to be remembered to you.
Do send me a line as soon as you can find
the place for it. I need you sadly. Since
writing you my little Bess has been very
ill with fever. I was worn out with watching
and anxiety and have not recovered either
health or spirits. Be good and write me
you darling Anna. You are kindling
wood to so many lives. God grant you
never feel their insatiate demands or
burden. The law of compensation should
return you all you give to others in
fullest measure.
As [?Ever?] my heart to you
S. J. Austin

Milwaukee April 12th 1/72
My Anna
  I am just rejoicing in spirit over
the prospect of seeing you.  It seems too good
to be true to come for I cannot be disappointed
after having set my heart upon it.  May
all the Gods defend the "Raid on Minnesota".
I can work up to that event patiently in
these weeks so you will only come. I
performed such extraordinary antics in the
office in reading your letter that the male
creatures here abouts looked as if they thought
I was going crazy.  I quite forgot where I was
and I presume the afore said creatures never
suspected me of any demonstration of any kind
before.  Blessings did not come singly that day
to me either for by the same post came a letter
from my dear old friend Lizzie Blake. She
had tracked me through Mrs. Anna Lex, and 
she through [?] sister somehow - I [?] justknow. I have hungered and thirsted after 
my dear old Lizzie but should never have 
written her if she had not made me. What's 
the use? There is nothing in me anymore that 
anybody would care to get at. I am no longer 
myself but somebody else at least so it seems 
to me - If you do come my darling, make 
your plans to rest here a bit and do some 
missionary work in me. My small house is 
large enough for you my german madchen 
capable of compassing your needs, and for 
the rest - I have entertained angels before 
not unaware, and felt the Eucharistic 
meanings of their presence. Ah me! Why 
is it not given me to be near you? 
I want to know all about the book you 
are going to write. Is it a novel? 
My beautiful strong hearted darling have you 
really gone beyond the shadow which darkened 
your life? Then indeed are you transfigured 
into the upper regions of sacredness to me, although 
it makes me cry to think of it. All you 
say is true my dear - only I do not see 

how you could do it. It makes my heart ache to think of the wrench. And the other one has nothing in all the world, not a hope of anything
You dare not withhold your sympathy at least. Where is the compensation 
for such a life - such boundless capacity for all life can 
offer a human soul its richest blessing, in perfect fullness!
Sometimes in my ascetical moods, I think such grand spherical
natures should be sufficient in themselves, should need nothing desire nothing except what their own royal souls can supply. And 
yet, how much more fascinating the human weakness and tenderness which craves love and sympathy. Things must be righted somewhere, somehow, in the beyond -
I never hear from the Doggetts wish I could - I am sorry to hear they are sick, although it is no wonder - for our winter and spring in 
this great inland sea - has been dreadful. I have been sick all the spring. Should not have been out of bed half 
the time, but for the necessity of earning 
bread and butter. Have been pricked and 
stabbed with neuralgic needles all [strups?] 
in a way to make me nearly mad. If one 
could only be done with an existence half pain 
and what remains very unsatisfactory at best 
and give place to stronger souls who can work 
and not faint how much better it would 
be. You ask me if I have no plan, in the maturity 
of which my life might be more agreeable. My 
dear, I must work for daily necessities, and 
do the best I can in what I have to do. I cannot 
choose agreeable work. My first duty and care 
is to provide for and educate my children. 
I would give anything to get away from here where 
we should not be compelled to face our disgrace 
but I have strong helpful friends here, and I 
must be patient until something better offers - 
Bless you my darling for your wish to help me 
You do help me, your letters lift me out of the depths 
Just as I comfort myself thinking of Salies safe 
sheltered life just so it brings joy to me thinking that
you and two or three other dear souls love and 
care for me. Write me when you will come - but 
not that you have given it up.
From my whole heart, dear love -
faithfully Yours S. F. Austin


July 8th 1/72

My best beloved
I have been trying to 
get to a letter to you for the last ten 
days, but have not had life enough to 
utter myself, even to you. We have had 
one awful hot week, but I was in clover 
perfectly well. Worked every moment
walked four miles every day to and 
from my work. When the mercury gets 
among the nineties I just begin to 
live. My good time closed abruptly 
one day. When the mercury fell 20 deg 
in one hour that, nearly killed me. 
My poor nerves ached and throbbed 
in neuralgic agonies and drove me 
to bed. It is a littler warmer to day 
but there are no open windows in the 
room where I am writing. I wish you 
were here my darling, if you want to
[*I think you have chosen a good subject for the book. You will have 
full scope for your dramatic utterence and the sensation part need 
not be wanting 
if you could 
only locate 
it 
in Europe, you 
could make 
more of it, for 
the government 
persecution, would 
supply all the 
necessary tragic 
You did not 
tell me where 
you are going 
to write me 
as often as you 
have the time, dear 
heart. 
Your own 
S.F. Austinbe where it is cool. It is never too warm
for comfort in this great cold
Lake.You cannot understand my
dear love how your letters are longed
for and the good they do me. With two
such friends as you and Lizzie Blake
I should hold my murmuring tongue
forever and take whatever ills life brings
me meekly with such compensation as 
your precious love and so I do to some 
extent my darling but I do get so 
fearfully blue at times and lose all
heart and hope and faith in others and
myself I never used to have any
morbid tendencies Lizzie Blake used
to call me "a perfect bird of hope." There 
is a weary mocking in her persisting to
call me so still I have almost come
to doubt all capacity in my own heart
and all existence in others of any
active spontaneous enabling emotion.
The clothes pins and forked radishes
moving about me I take about as

much interest in, as if they were
shadows. But to you oh sweet
Chaldean!  my heart is always open 
Dear  loyal heart! I wish there were
new words in which to clothe my
love and trust in you Ah Anna if
you were only rich enough to go abroad
and have me to take care of you That
would be something to work up to and
you do not know what an economist I 
am and with what comfort I could
surround you at an expenditure snobs
never dreamed of But I am not going 
to think of that. No such good thing
will ever come to me. You will merry
some creature or other and my castles 
in Spain tumble into nothing
Yes darling Mrs Lex traced my through
your sister, bless her! And ever since
I have had the dearest letters and most
loving messages from Lizzie and all
her friends. Mrs Lex sent me "Bede's 
Charity" the other day. Do you know it?
It is a simple, Christian story, without pretension, but a book of such touching
pathos I have seldom read - one just
cries their eyes out over it. Do you
know Mrs Lex? How I wish you
would go and see Lizzie Blake. I have
always wanted you to meet her and
cannot give it up. I heard in a 
round about way of the Doggetts. They
were travelling in the Yosemite and
their boy staying at Dr. Cass's in
Oakland opposite San Francisco. You
remember Mrs Cass in Madison.
I am going to send the book to Mr Reid
tomorrow, have been only waiting to hear
from you. What is the Political outlook
Greeley is sure to be nominated by the 
democrats. All of the apostles of that
creed say to here abouts. An old white
coast is a prosaic thing to rally about
but a cigar is not less so. What a muddle
the whole peoples are in, drifting without
cable chains or anchors. I see Mr. Reid
comes in for his share of abuse, which makes
me mad. Any friend of yours I take on 
trust and wear their colors henceforth. 

Milwaukee March 6th /73
My darling
Why are you silent 
to me so long? I grope blindly 
in the dark for you, but can 
hear nothing of your whereabouts. 
Are you sick, or too busy to 
remember poor me? You do not 
know how I miss you dear, for 
you are the one sweet soul left me 
from the wreck - where all 
went down. I have been ill 
for two weeks with a sharp attack 
of fever, which never leaves much 
of me with which to start in life 
anew. During this time I have 
had, both sleeping and waking 
dreams of you. My fever dreamsI should have felt you, had you been so near. 
I think of you and love you always. I send loving 
homage across the earth spaces which divide us, and 
amid all the trials which beset my life. all the 
demands which call me out of myself to supply 
the needs of others. Through all and in all 
my love finds its truest happiest outlet towards 
you, darling and it would be just the same if 
I were never to see you again. 
For these many weeks I have been very anxious about 
Julie. She has had very serious trouble with her 
heart and seems more discouraged about herself 
than ever before. I hope for better news but try

where you were beset with snakes 
from which I strove in agony to 
rescue you have left such a haunting 
dread about you that I must break 
the silence to ask where and how 
you are. It is not from the snakes 
I fear for you my darling - at least 
not such as crawl upon thin bellies, 
that variety is to much less to 
be dreaded then the human serpents 
besetting our paths, and from these 
your life seems tolerably exempt 
But will you tell me dear heart 
how it goes with you.  If you are 
well and happy and if there 
is any prospect of you coming 
west. You may have been in 
Chicago for all I know to the
contrary - only it seems to meto feel prepared for anything
I wonder if anybody can ever be
prepared for any real changes
menacing the creature or thing
they love Apropos my dear
Anna- do you know if your
friend Reid has ever done 
anything about Jule's book-
I do so wish the matter could
be decided in some way - I am
so weary of writing her- that 
I hear nothing in relation to it
He has probably forgotten all
about it and if I knew his address
should not trouble you with it.
Let me hear something from 
you my darling. I get letters 
from Miss Blake but she
never knows anything of you
All your own
S. F. Austin
Miss A. E. DickinsonJan' 15th /75
My darling,
This dreadful event has 
so nearly finished me, that I have 
become indifferent to most things temporal, and 
spiritual.  Bess and I have nearly frozen 
to death, complicated with the misery 
of hunger also. It was so cold I dare
not send her out to get anything
and I was so ill with neuralgia of
the heart and stomach. I could not hold
my head up. Fortunately Bernie came
home Monday which makes our condition
a little more tolerable. It is a little
warmer today, but still bitter cold. 
My dear I think if you had lived within
two blocks with plenty of servants and
plenty of money you would have sent 
over to see how it fared with us. You
know a friend of ours lives thus and so
[*until you have done with it yourself if you do I shall
only regret I spoke
to you of the
matter 
and be
unhappy 
over it
You never 
tell me
a thing of
your Mother
or Sue.
My heart to
you. 
S.F.A.*]As poor Hood had reason to say “Alas for
The rarity of Christian charity under 
the sun”! A dreadful thing happened here 
yesterday. a little boy ten years old
(German) without father or mother stole
15 cts. being hungry.  He was brought 
before the police court and sentenced
to the reform school until of age -
Upon hearing the sentence he fell down
in spasms, was carried to the hospital
and died the same evening.  Our interesting 
papers publish the facts - but abstain from
comment. Meantime the city is excited
over the hospitable resolution to give 
King Kalakaua a cordial reception in 
his arrival today. Of course one little 
life crushed out under a judicial heel
is of no consequence. I hope there is divine
compassion - as well as divine justice 
in the “upper country.”
I was much surprised at your discription
of Mrs Rously. Had supposed her



to be a “rara avis” - from the notices
in the papers - and even this morning
the woman correspondent from the St Louis
Republican writing from N.Y. Showers
her with fulsome praise.  The article 
a half column long. is copied into our
morning paper. I hope something good
will come out of your acquaintance 
with [?alleck]. He is rich is he
not. Have you ever thought of doing a
lecture on John Brown? I am sure 
you could. something grand.
Ah. my darling how I did wish you 
had been in San Francisco during 
these last weeks with interest and
friendship enough from somebody to 
make a golden pile for you out of 
the rise in mining stocks
What do you think of the state of 
things in the South? I see Phillips
endorses Grant very strongly - Is Butler 
still in firm with the Administration?I hoped he would get a foreign mission
Do you ever see him, and does he know
any thing of your plans - or what you
would like. What have you done about
the Chicago investments? I wrote
the Col, thanking him for his Xmas
remembrance - I hope you write him
sometimes. He wrote me his brother's had
come to St Louis to reside. I am
glad for him. He will be happier, poor
fellow  I suppose you hear enough about 
the Beecher trial. I believe he will be
acquitted, but with no justice, I suppose
the happy family circle dragged into court
his wife and children is for effect upon
the jury. And it will tell. Have you ever
met Tilton? Ah my dearie - when you
have any cast off garments - flannel, stockings
or dresses - send them to me will you.
I cannot always keep Bessie properly
clothed for school. Just send anything

Feb 2nd 1/73 -
My dearest love
This is the first hour I have
dared release myself from Bessie's bed side
for some days. She has been very ill for more
than a week with [?] sore throat, almost
diphtheria. Oh these weary nights! all alone with
a sick child. Meantime, and in the midst
of this tumble, came your letter. and the boxes
Ah my darling! both heart and eyes overflow
with love and gratitude - but I am not
pleased or satisfied, that you do what you
do. When I told you that any half worn garments
would be just what I need and want to keep
us warm. I meant only what I said. If you
were rich my dearie I should enter no protest
to you sending your self to the poor house
metaphorically. The contents of these boxes were
not purchased[?] for a [?] any - and as to my 
believing the "winter outfit some of [?]
having more than you need" - and all of that.
I dont believe a word of it - I know youToo well for that. Now what did you do it
for? And that lovely polonaise! You have
never worn it.  Why not? If I were to wear 
it here, unless on some very extraordinary 
occasion - some dear friend ? would give a 
lunch party in order that kindred hens might 
have opportunity to talk me over and 
decide upon the criminality of my dressing 
“under the circumstances.”  It is perfectly 
lovely only you had no business to send
it. Poor Bess beamed and brightened, and 
began to get well at once, when the boxes 
were unpacked and contents spread upon her 
bed.  I have so often experienced the healing 
influence of something to stir sluggish pulses 
coming in the shape of a letter from you. I 
could well understand a similar phenomenon 
in the child. You are my providence Anna
darling, and if the future holds no compensations
for what you do, then there is no justice 
in the world.
     The terrible cold still 

holds us in relentless clutch. Last Sunday 
was a fearful day here. I am so glad and 
thankful you are not exposed to the rigors 
of this winter.  You can hardly know how 
dreadful it has been here.  The idea of you 
getting sick going to hear that Beecher monster,
I think you might have been patient under 
affliction coming to you in other way
not that. Gracious! Will that abomination 
never end? There is only one opinion throughout 
the West eschewed by all respectable newspapers - 
big that Beecher is guilty, disgustingly 
atrociously guilty, and whether a jury 
find him so or not. will make no difference 
in the world’s verdict. I think Moulton is 
splendid. Do you know him? The N.Y.
correspondent of the Chicago Tribune, whose 
letters are more than excellent, predicts a 
tragedy as end to this drama. Says “no 
one watching B. day after day seeing the 
purple blood surging up into his bloated 
face, and the parasitic twitching of hisfingers can help the conviction that either 
confusion will be wrung from his tortured 
soul or else he will fall dead in his 
place. "Whatever thou doest,  do quickly" 
say I. Do not forget to tell me about 
Roger Pryor. The papers say you will 
debut at the Globe Theatre. Tell me 
when you know, how, when, and what. 
I am always thinking of you always 
longing and praying for every good in 
life for you. I should be happier if I 
could help, as others do, but if the future 
holds this for me, I will wait my time. 
I read a discription of your Sisters dress
at the Charity Ball. I wish I could have 
read about yours. I should have liked right 
well, to have had my darling distinguish 
herself among all those fine birds - 
Bess sends a thousand kisses and a 
heart full of love. All there is in me 
or of me is yours, and I hold you 
fast the one good thing in my poor life. 
Faithfully S. F. AustinTuesday eve the 11th
My dearest love
We are just this 
moment in receipt of the telegram 
from your sister, for which I bless 
her sweet soul devoutly.  I cannot 
tell you the anxiety we have had for 
you. I hope never to live over again 
such a week of pain and torture 
on your account dear child.  It seemed 
as if we could never get a word of 
information about you.  My husband 
fairly besieged the telegraph office 
sending messages to Chicago, then to 
Rockford, then waiting, waiting, till at 
last about 9 o'clock at night, having 
tried all day - we finally got a 
dispatch.  In the meantime, I had my 
traveling bag all packed to start for 
you, only waiting to know if you were 
at a hotel.  I should have come anyway 
dear, only I had not quite impudence 
enough to make a descent upon you 
in a private house, even in my great lovefor you.  How did you get sick - and 
where, and when?  Tell me all about 
it. I want to ask you a thousand 
questions and I want you to come 
up here that I may. I write only 
to join my entreaties to the Metcalfs 
that you will come up here to recruit. 
You can come here in one day, long 
before you are able to go home, and 
then if you get quite well and strong, 
you will be able to keep some of 
your lecture engagements.  Bring 
that good sister with you, and 
be at rest about all trials, till 
you are fully restored.  Now my 
dear, what do you say?  Please try 
to see it as we do, and think it 
better to come.  After serious 
wrangles and discussions with 
Mrs. Metcalf I have consented that 
you may go to them first, only 'cause 
their house is heated by steam and 
their air is soft and sweet - just the 
thing for your impaired lungs. 
And beside they want you so very 

much, pleading so hard we could 
not say no.  Do come, we will be 
in a state of ecstatic bliss, if you 
will.  I should see you every 
day - and just as soon as you 
get able to rough it a little then 
you are to come back to your old 
quarters in this modest abode.  
What can I say to influence you 
dear love.  It seems that we cannot 
wait another year to see you by the 
danger you have been in, making 
us realize how very dear you are 
to us, by the thought so forced upon 
us, that you, and all of us have 
so very slight a hold on life, all 
this, and this, dear Anna, words as 
so empty.  Will you come and let 
us take care of you?

Bendman wrote us 
from Chicago, (in a state of distraction 
about you) for information. As his case 
is evidently critical, he must be 
telegraphed at once.  I think he isa victim, I only hope his tragedy 
will never be real to him.  
You had hardly been gone an hour 
when I had a letter from Lizzie 
Blake, a part of which are designed 
for you.  She had calculated to 
find you here.  I was requested to 
"give you a good shaking for declining 
to make her acquaintance". You 
may consider yourself shook, if you 
are able, otherwise I will hug you 
in place thereof.
I have not time for another word 
if this goes in time for the mail 
tonight. My darling do send us 
word how you are and if we 
may expect you.  Give my love 
to your sister, whom I long 
very much to know. I hope she 
will certainly come up with you.
With a thousand kisses
Yours devotedly
Sallie Austin
this [?]Anna E Dickinson 

Nov 9th My dear love - What good angel 
sent you to me today, through the medium of 
ink and paper!  How I have hoped, and longed 
for this dear letter.  I could not understand why 
you were silent to me so long.  It has given 
me such sharp pain my precious Anna, and 
I have sought every where for explanation. I could 
not believe you would let me quite drop 
out of your life - dear - if you were happy.  I 
knew you would not in your sorrow.  I have 
never doubted you for an instant. I have only 
hoped and wondered  when you would pick 
me up again.  Of course the two letters you 
sent me here never came to my hands.  Letters 
from other friends have met a similar fate. 
It is very hard to bear.  You ask me how I am 
I answer I do not know.  I shall be very glad 
to here you tell me if God gives me the 
blessing to meet you. I thought today as the 
hot tears poured over the paper while reading 
your letter - if I must live my life - so difficult 
I should not dare indulge in the luxury 
of such sympathy every day. I thought I had 
become tolerably hard - but you reach down.

[*I would be so glad to see them- If you lecture in Madison this winter!  
I wish you could 
have seen your old 
admirer Dr. Wolcott 
flush and flush in 
his praise of you - He
said you 
are "the noblest 
woman God ever 
made" - to which 
I said, Amen! 
from my whole 
heart.  He asked 
if you could not 
be induced to 
come here.  You 
knew he married 
Dr. Rois  did you 
not?  I have stolen 
the time from business 
to write you could 
have not time to 
look my letter over

into my heart and tear aside all masks 
I believe sympathy from those I value would 
make me weak - So long as I walk the 
earth thinking nobody cares very much 
whether I perish by the way side - or keep 
my frail back from sinking a little 
longer, I am prepared to meet, and conquer 
my fate - with a perfectly stoical indifference
I never think of myself at all, as if I do, with 
such contempt for my petty needs and 
general earthiness that disgusts me. I seem 
to touch life at only two points - one through 
my children - hoping and praying for strength 
and success to compass their needs in the 
not far distant time when I shall be obliged 
to provide for them solely - the other in 
my boundless sympathy for suffering and 
want and inefficiency - which comes to my 
knowledge through the avenues of my business 
life. And this brings me to what I am doing. 
Just before I left for Europe in June - 
The management of the "Hope Mutual Life Insurance 
Co of New York." organized a Ladies Bureau 
having for aim and object the purpose [the 
intention] of furnishing employment for women 
of education and social position, who have 
been thrown upon their own resources. giving 
them the same remuneration for service, that men have 

[*My heart to you in blessing and clear - faithful love
Direct 119. Wisconsin Street S. F Austin*]

in the same field. The management of this organization - was offered me 
so urgently - with a salary of twelve hundred a year - that I accepted it &
entered upon my duties immediately on my return from Europe. It was an 
experiment, and I have given it the best there is in me, my entire energies 
and thoughts. So far it has been a success. The Press throughout the State have 
endorsed the movement cordially, and while there are comparatively few 
women of sufficient energy and spirit to do the work, those who have undertaken 
it are doing well - better than the men engaged in the same work - My duties 
are entirely in the office. I conduct the correspondence and teach agents 
the business of Life Insurance - My work is only unsatisfactory in that it 
can so seldom benefit those who need it most - they who are incapacitated 
by disease, and mental prostration. to do the work at my disposal. there is 
scarce a day in which I do not listen to such tales as nearly freeze me with 
horror, or stir my soul with disgust. You know, how most women of the Class 
I here indicated have been thrown upon their own exertions - 
Sometimes it is true 
through the gates of death, but in most cases, by sin not theirs - and from 
nameless diseases - result and consequence of sensious indulgences on the part 
of those who were pledged to protect and cherish them through life. My own 
lot is no less helpless then theirs - but I am stronger than some to put my 
misery down. And so my life goes on day by day - I sometimes wonder 
"what God is going to do next with me." I have hoped to be able to save
a little money, to help me take care of the 
children, in a little home of my own, but 
since I began my work, Mr A refuses to 
clothe the children - which compels me to 
provide for their wants. (He has paid for 
their board up to this time) With all my 
economies I can save but little from my 
salary for future use. This is "how and what" 
I am doing Anna dear. My journey to escape was 
safely accomplished, I left Julie happy in her own 
home. Wanting her, my life seemed for a time to lack 
all object. She has always been such a case to me - but 
I have the greatest comfort in thinking of her safe &
sheltered from the annoyance of my life. She is 
not so strong as I would wish & I do not think she 
ever will be, but she is happy - She wanted to see 
you more than I can express - and we always hoped 
up to the last moment to hear of you before we sailed. 
The other children are well, and a great comfort to 
me. About meeting you in Chicago, it will be 
hard enough for me, if I cannot. I shall come if 
I can leave the office one day. Tell me what day 
to come and if you stop at a hotel, which one
I will try to find if Mr Doggett has returned 
do not even know if they were burned out - I 
have forgotten where they lived. Ah Anna, how much 
I want to know how it fares with you.  I ransack the 
New York papers for intelligence, and only lately since
of your lecture there. I must know something about 
you - where did you spend the summer? I must 
know why you gave up your European plan I believe 
you do not need to lie. What I want to hear 
about you. I carry you always in my heart. There 
is nothing in all the world I would so want as 
being near you. Pardon me the egoship of my letter 
since I died one day - I have not written so much 
about myself - How you will enjoy the DoggettsMilwaukee March 25th
My dear Anna - my precious girl,
Your letter was 
an inexpressible relief to me. I have been 
tortured with the idea that you might 
be ill among strangers. I can well 
understand you are better after the billious
attack was over - you naturally would be. 
But the sweet healing of the sunshine of
happiness shed upon your head and heart 
was everything to you. For Child I am 
always thinking of you. I carry your sorrows
with my own to the end of the tender
pitiful Savior. I hush the bitter words 
upon my lips thinking of you. I would hear 
still more of that weary misery,, to give 
rest and peace to your sweet soul - I cannot 
bear to have youth cheated and of one of its 
legitimate joys. I have been happy - perhaps 
it is best I should suffer now that I 
may feel more keenly for others.during my absence. Anna dear, do you think I could obtain a
newspaper correspondence or anything of that sort. If I could only get something
by which I could support myself ever so modestly. I would 
be so happy. How I would like to travel with you -I could help
you in that way at least. If you think it possible to do anything
for me in this way, without trouble to yourself you may ask it
I have been looking for something to send you, of the things which
were published of mine during my absence, but can only find this
letter which I enclose, written to Lizzie Blake of Philadelphia, 
which she sent to the Baltimore Eclectic. I have written much
better letters but Mr A. has apparently not kept them. This will perhaps
do, as a specimen if you care to show it to anybody. The article
I sent to Appletons Journal, after being accepted, was finally sent
back with a note, saying they had so much before it already in
type, it would be three months before they could give it place, &
by that time, it would no longer be of interest from the subject. 
The subject is Paris seen by a Lady. July 1870. Prof Richards
who read the manuscript and who was good enough to praise it

My tears are blinding me. I cannot write 
of myself or you. Cannot put myself into 
words. How can people talk?
Your letter dear 
child was such a comfort to Julie and
myself alike. I came from Madison in haste
to find her ill in bed. Poor child this life
is killing her, and she must live it quickly
as possible. I feel the greatest anxiety about
her. It is quite possible I may go over to 
Germany with her in May. Her [aff?]
is anxious that I should, and I cannot
have him come here. I believe it would kill
me. I have written my consent to go if he
and his mother think best In case I go. 
What are your plans. Can we not go together
I am so delighted that you are going it
will be the best thing in the world for
you How I wish I could stay with you
during the time, to take care of you, and
help you in all ways possible for me. If
I was only rich enough I would, I tell you
As it is I shall be obliged to go and return 
immediately. My sister will keep Bessie
and my friends here look after my boyvery highly, wrote me to send it to
Harpers without delay. This I have done 
three days ago.
Of the [?] I know
nothing definite. I have heard they were
to return this summer. I heard it from
a lady who has lately met some of Mrs Ds
friends in Chicago. Let me know what 
your plan is for going to England. I will
write you the first moment I know anything
definite of our plans. I am getting Salie 
ready to go as fast as possible. As for myself
I should take no baggage in case I return
immediately. We should go in a German Steamer
North German Lloyd line." I prefer there to any 
others. In case you should go and wish to go
with us we could probably [?] to suit 
each other about the time of sailing. Only let
me know as soonas possible.
Thank you a thousand
times dear Anne, for the efforts you are making
to help me. Whether you succeed or not I bless
you all the same for it. [Sale?] sends her 
heart to you. Let me hear from you as soon 
as you decide upon anything. Can I write
you, anything I might write about myself, or yourself
without the letter meeting other eyes than yours.
With my whole heart dear child faithfully yours
Anna E. Dickinson S. F. AustinAugust 26
My darling
I have been in the 
depths all day and am in no mood
for letter writing. I only want to climb 
to your heart just a moment before 
going to bed.  Perhaps then I may be 
able to sleep. I received your note 
of the 22nd yesterday. I am full 
of sorrow over the health of the 
dear Mother. I pray it may soon 
be better with her. The heat has been 
so excessive everywhere, she has 
doubtless felt its enervating effects.
I hope she will stay with you many 
years my darling long enough to see 
see you at your best which is yet to 
come. You will be sorry to see the 
notice of the death of Mrs. Bailey 
which I enclose. Col sent me the
[**I hold you in my arms and long for you so.
S.F.A.**]the summer at the sewing machine. I had a deal 
of sewing to do. to get the children ready to leave a
year.  This week I have allowed myself a little time
to ride and visit but I can never stir out doors
without seeing that which sends me home humiliated and
wretched. Yesterday I went out driving with a party 
of lady friends when Col. M one of the principal drives
Mr. A. And his creature. And what do you think 
he did? Why turn round and follow us every 
where we went. We endured it as long as we could
then I begged to be taken home, knowing he would not 
molest the others when I was out of the way.
Ah dear! Will I never be out of the way of this until
the [?] shuts me in. He has built himself

paper yesterday. He was such a 
loyal son. so true and simple hearted 
that any one knowing him even
very slightly must feel his loss.
I pray for his poor wife. The clippings 
I send will be the last. Enough and
too much of this disgusting abomination.
My dear I don’t agree with you about 
B. Don’t see how you can think him 
“innocent and a coward.” I have 
never thought a man could be a 
coward who was innocent — least of 
all this man. No matter, I do not 
care. If they will only let you 
live they may continue until the 
end of time for ought I care.
You ask me what I am doing? 
Only what each day brings of care 
and later for the children. It 
seems I have spent the most offine new house and sports a 
horse and carriage. Meantime his
only son works like a slave to 
support us in this mean way 
so full of miserable shifts and 
privations which I would not would not mind 
did it fall on me alone. Bernie 
is just splendid-he is so sunny 
and bright so full of energy and 
pluck that I have no words strong
enough to praise him.
I wrote letters of introduction today 
for a splendid young fellow going 
abroad. His last words were “If 
you and Miss D. come, remember 
I am at your disposition, [?] 
and baggage master.” It would be 
very well to see him in some places.
Tell me more of your Mother and 
is your sister with you! Give 
love to both. Bess sends her 
heart as usual. God bless your sweetMilwaukee Sept 22

My Dear Anna

How glad I am you
are not dead, nor married; but just girding
on your harness for a winter Campaign.
Can no word of praise, or reproach from 
me bring a sign from you? If there be
such an one tell me what it is; If of 
praise, I will entwine it in most ex-
alted phrase; if of reproach no gall
shall equal it in bitterness - If to
speak of you often, had any mind
on it, or to think of you oftener, I should
deserve by this time more than one
epistle! But it seems that neither my
good, nor ill deserts move you, so I
am constrained to write you a second
before my last is answered. Think
of yourself in contrast with "Dickey"
I had such a beautiful note from 
her but last week, about yet you - 
dear sinner - do not ask my pardon -
see I have forgiven you before you
ask it. If you restored yourself 
to health, and will but look as rosy
and happy this winter when you come
to us as you did last. I shall cherish
no resentments - When you come to
us next winter we shall be quite charged.
I shall not have a home of my own
to offer you for I expect to be upon 
that town - The long talked of project
of sending Jule to Europe has almost 
culminated into a reality.Mrs Austin leaves here, as we now
expect, for New York on the 2d of
October, to take ship for the old world
on the 5th sail for Hamburg or 
Bremen - She is intending to take
with her Jule and Bernie - leaving
Bessie at Madison with our sister
Thus I am to be bereft of all my
idols at a single blow. How I shall
endure it I am unable to surmise:
Perhaps with the same kind of
"sang froid" which I have the credit
of possessing, but of which I never
was concious. I may be tempted
to sit under some other vine and
fig tree when the clusters are stript
from my own, and the branches lopped
off. May I not taste now and then
of the fruits of your vineyard - If 
I should be passing there? - This 
separation from my family I do not
like, and can hardly believe myself
sane, when I think that I have consented 
to it. - It is partly your fault
it being the practical results of your 
doctrine - You believe and teach
if God has given one a talent it
should be used and improved; and 
so do I. - Now God has given my
Child song - the more she cultivates
and improves it the more capable
she will be of praising Him and
requiting the Giver - With what

[* Mrs Austin & Jule expect to be absent two years*]



He has given her He has also given
one the disposition and means enough
to help her and I am resolved to make
the sacrifice of my personal comfort
to do it and when all is done that duty
seems to demand I intend to leave
the child and my own work in the
hands of Him who endowed her with
such a gift - You have said and
I have [re-echoed?] the utterance oft,
"woman should be educated for some
other purpose than to marry a man."
I think she should be educated - 
then if marriage comes properly attended 
both are acceptable - Much has
been said to me about the danger of
educating her as that she will necessarily 
encounter the temptations,
and dangers of a public life - and 
I have had something of a struggle
with my own prejudices in that regard
but I do not know why. If she can
stand up and sing that grand and 
sublime anthem, "I know that my 
Redeemer liveth" and you thrill the
listener with rapture - or if you 
can stand up and utter it with
such fiery eloquence as shall enkindle 
devotion, and exalt some
poor trembling soul above its doubts
and fears - why she should be forbidden 
to sing it or you to speak it.
Go on I say and "do with all thy
might what thy hand findeth to 
do" whether you be man or woman
and here is my heart and hand
to cheer and to help -So my dear Anna recognize in
all this which I am about to do the
fruits of your own labor. If it be
wrong you shall have the satisfaction
of thinking we intended well - if right
the obvious pleasure of having done
what we could - Do I not desire
now and then a kind thought from
you and will you not spare it to 
me when I am alone. - With such
a host of beautiful friends as I have
one ought to be good and since I 
have added you and Dickey and 
your kind mother to my list I have
become better. - It ends with such 
a thought I begain this letter- for 
in looking about in my wife's desk
for a bit of paper my fingers touched
your last letter - and I read -
Mother and Dickey desire to be most kindly
remembered - They are and will
ever be. How delighted I was to 
receive Dickey's letter! and sorry to 
know that she has been ill all 
the summer. - Why did I not bring
her West with me? - Somehow
I have the impression that Philadelphia
is not a good place to
live in during the summer months.
If I should go to New York to see
my family off - I will go or return
through your city and stop over
one train - If you should be
in New York you will find 
the party at the Merchants Hotel
on Courtland Street.



They will stop there, if they are
alone to be near the Steamer's dock
but will be there only over night.
I suppose your engagements for
the season commence soon, and
I shall see you here if not before
I have so many things to tell
you that might be pleasant to
hear, but would not be worth the
trouble of writing. Do not make
any rearrangements, matrimonial
or otherwise, because from June
until October next I want you to go 
with me to Europe and see my
family. I have the promise of
being sent there by Government
officials and expresses paid if the 
administration of A. J should
continue so long. For that purpose
I hope it may continue. I do not
see how the country can endure
it. Perhaps the people could better
afford to pay my expenses to Europe
and back. But would it not be 
splendid to go over there, without
the world knowing it, and spend
a few months as a spy preparatory
to your going there some day to take
the land by storm. When do you
expect to be here? Let me know
because Mr. & Mrs Metcalf are
to have the exclusive pleasure
of enjoying you alone, except
that portion of you which I canfitch from them. Mr Metcalf 
is still in Europe and is not expected 
home till November--
He has been living at high tide, 
during his absence-- Do you go 
through Massachusetts before coming 
West? If you do and go to Pittsfield 
I wish you should let me know, 
I want to introduce you to some 
of the most delightful literary 
people in the world- Some dear 
friends of ours who have been 
here this summer. They are so much 
prejudiced against you, not from 
anything they know, or have heard 
about you but from what they 
do not know of you -- It delights 
me to lay such people at your 
feet--conquered and entranced. 
The lady who is an authoress 
and a sister of your Philadelphia 
lady known as 'Alice Neal' was 
most bitter in her prejudice-- 
One day she said "I do really believe 
I shall get to liking Miss Dickinson 
and what a strange thing that 
will be after what I have thought 
and said of her"-- So I wish her to 
see you that she may not only 
like you, but love you-- I wish her 
to have the pleasing mortification of 
being disarmed by you-- She will 
attack you whenever she meets 
you again--being more determined 
to know you for my sake--

[*Mrs Austin and Jule send love and would so like
to see you before they go- Perhaps they may soon again*]



I am pained to know that you entertain 
serious apprehensions for 
the health and life of your brother 
Sam. Will no kindness keep[ing] him 
back from the dreadful fate?- 
I should not have been so much 
surprised to hear ill tidings of you 
or Dickey-- Sue says he is prepared 
for either world, and I cannot but 
think that parting could therefore 
be less painful to you all.--
Hope for the best. A few more 
imprudences of the character of 
that of which you were guilty last 
winter will send you headlong to 
eternity before them all-- Will 
you not be more thoughtful of 
yourself this coming season, if not 
for your own sake, for that of loving 
friends? How is it with the book. 
Will next December see its natal 
day? or has the summer passed 
in making sinew for the labor 
of the winter? We now and then 
hear of you by way of the public 
prints in such way as this--
"Anna Dickinson is about to be 
married"- That was the last I saw 
"Anna Dickinson is at the sea side 
writing a book" &c If I believed 
that the book was no nearer 
written than your wedding day, 
I should despair of reading itin my life time-- Somehow I 
have never thought of you rending 
the prospective character of "Mrs 
Hodge" or "Mrs Brown" or "Mrs 
Jones" I should tenaciously contest 
the right, of one man, to appropriate 
to his exclusive [you] use 
so much of the world's treasure
Humanity has an interest in you 
that no one man should consent 
to his own use and thus circumvent 
and defraud it-- When the right 
person comes I would not forfend 
thee from the pleasures and pangs 
of matrimony--if to be not destruction 
to thy works--and an 
entombing of they gifts-- Would 
Anna as a certain lecturer be 
as attractive and impressive as 
Anna Dickinson [as] a lecturer 
on womens suffrage? But I 
ought to cease-- This is certainly 
interference with matters too grave 
for jest and too personal for my 
suggestions-- Better to "stay at 
home in your own mind" as Emerson 
says-- Give my love to your dear 
Mother and say to her that one 
of the most charming never to be 
forgotten events of my life was 
seeing her and talking with her To 
Dickey say nothing-- I intend to visit 
her soon-- I wish to say all to her 
myself. Take much love to yourself 
if you consider it worth having--
Austin



My dear Anna. If you had not been 
such a bad child--so persistently 
dumb to us. I could have told you 
long ago of this new phase in our 
affairs. I did not know your address 
and supposed you all at the sea 
till your sister wrote Mr Austin. 
Now I went to see more then I can 
tell. It puts me into a perfect 
rage to think of your coming here 
next winter when I am gone. I want 
you and "Sue" to be just as good to 
my poor forlorn husband as possible. 
As for me I do not know how I am ever 
to leave him and little Bess. I cannot 
think of it without a great lumpcoming into my throat if Austin had
not promised to come to see me, I would
not go And you are to come with him
without fail. We have talked whole 
chapters about it. It would be the 
best thing you could essay for your 
health. An Ocean voyage. One more
thing I must say to you. I know Mr
Phillips since I saw you. I never
enjoyed any man so much and
one strong regret I feel at leaving home
this winter is that I shall fail to see 
him when he comes. He promised to stay
over a day or two with us. Will you 
tell him this and also if he should by
any chance visit Europe during the next 



two years, I hope he will not fail to come and
visit me. You need not be a bit jealous little
girl altho' I do love him as much as the 
law allows. Dear Anna write me a word
before I go. I shall get it if you sit down
and write directly. I so long to hear from
you. I wish you would go and see 
Lizzie Blake, but not if it is disagreeable
to you. I hope you are well and happydear child and that the coming winter
will bring you fresh laurels. I am so
sorry I cannot see your Mother and
Sister before I go. Give my love to
them and remember Anna you are
to come to me next summer. 
Meanwhile I love you
Sallie AustinMy dear Anna. Your note of 27th from Maine
which reached me today is the first intelligence
I have had of you for months. I had no "letter
from the mountains" your last was from 
Atlantic City telling me of Redpath's visit to
you etc. Since this I have written you three
times. Hearing nothing, I concluded not to
bow you again until you picked me up.
I was always hoping you were so well and 
happy you had no need of me. It is a 
funny coincidence that you should have written
me on my birthday. I spent that cheerful?
anniversary in bed with a perfectly terrific
headache. In a half stupor of pain and 

[*as you gives me and it would not help 
you here 
only hinder 
I am as 
usual 
not strong
with 
thinking
from the
[?]
I just
planned
in one
day just
like the other.
At present
getting
Bess
clothed for the
winter.
She sends 
you much
love
As ever
my heart
to you
S.F.A. *]exhaustion neither awake nor asleep I seemed
to be with you and when I finally got over
the agony it seemed to me I had seen 
you. I am so glad you are better my
darling. The best news I have had of late. 
What of your mother? As you did not
speak of her I trust she has recovered.
Where is she and Sue?
So my dearie, I do not approve of the loves
benefit not a bit of it my girl. I wish I could
get at you perhaps I might make you see 
it as I do. You cannot offend it "Charity
begins at home" you know. I dare say you
will say it does, and mostly stays there, 
but my dear, you could not do this thing
in a corner If you failed there are



plenty of people, plenty of newspapers ready
to make the most of it. If you were to try
your unfledged wings for some great charity
something which stirs the popular heart - then
it would not matter whether you made a great
success or not. But your friend is not known
outside New York probably and the rest
of the world would not care a fig about her.
Beside there is all the labor, the study
and the rehearsals and for what? The dear
good heart is all right. You want to help
your friend. but I tell you again, you 
cannot offend it. The cost and risk to yourself
is altogether suspect. If you go to the stage
I want you to go in another way than this
a mere dillitante effort is not worthy ofyour name, condition, or estate. Suppose you succeed 
what then? It would not add one whit to your
fame in this country and in England where your
propose is speak in the spring it would harm
you greatly. You do not want to go before the
English public as an actress. Such are held
dirt cheap there. But you do want to present
yourself to them in your proper person - seer and 
Sybil, and sweet woman. You must be
supremely great on the stage or you must
descend to the tricks, smirks, and claptrap
of that idiotic Nilson to win the 
plaudits of the world. What can I say. You
know all this, and more. I set my face 
resolutely against the Jones benefit. Dont do
it dearie, I cannot have it. Both heart and
brain cries out against it. I am not wise
except the wisdom and foresight my great loveMilwaukee April 28th
My darling
My tears are just
raining over your letter this moment
received. It does not comfort me
one bit to know you do care 
for the miserable disappointment 
over which I ache so horribly. I 
believe I would rather you did 
not care at all then I might
reconcile myself to it perhaps. 
I have to fight the frogs in my
throat every time I think of you
and then the howlings of the 
children who will not be comforted
and who fret and worry
so over it is another misery.
Bernie is almost blasphemous
says "the impudence of these
people in compelling me to give

[*children send love. I am glad you like the hat. 
I thought it
was lovely*]you up to them is a thing not
to be endured peaceably. Bess, 
pathetic after her rival considers
herself defrauded, "When we have
so little, [?Memmer], so little 
pleasure" Oh well! well! and
the goodies I so enjoyed cooking
for you. It is a little something
to be able to do that and I did
so comfort myself in preparing
for you. The goodies are still
here. Nobody wants to eat them. 
And, that I am ashamed to 
believe myself so weak. I think
my disappointment was what
made me ill. I staid at Mrs
Metcalfs until Sunday afternoon
She was good as an angel to me
She always is, but I should 
have come home sooner, if I could 
have walked the two blocks



They kept Bess with me
but wild horses would not
have dragged Bernie down
there Sunday. not he. He 
staid at home all day alone
nursing his wealth. Bess hugs
herself over Bernie's surrender
to you, as that boy was never
known to express any admiration
for a woman before old is young.
The girls here invite him and
court him but he never goes
near them. I wanted my good
boy to know you because I felt
you would give him courage and
strength for the difficult battle 
of life before him. Of course you
were worn out when you reached 
Chicago, I knew you would be
Am glad you had the day to 
rest There came two letters thismorning. I knew they were from
Mr Bernard. Mrs Metcalf was here
when they came and we decided to
open them and if important, telegraph
you in Louisville. They were only
some information about the trains 
as we surmised & quite unimportant.
I suppose Mr Bernard thought we 
had a Sunday delivery which we
haven't. You shant call him "green eyes"
any more. I think he is splendid
to you. I hope you found the section 
of the sleeping car he secured for
you subject to your disposal.
Bennett is expected in New York
18th May. Do you know it is
reported he is engaged to a Danish
Princess? I should not wonder so
very much and what an era for 
snobdom in New York - if so - I
want you to see him. I hope the 
creature did tell you the truth.


and the gate through which you are
to pass leaving difficulties behind
will be found wide open. Ah dear and
oh dear, I had no chance to talk
with you about all this. I wish
you knew just where to go for the
needed assistance but if it is
right it must and will come
somehow. I have the greatest dread 
of you going to Calafornia. It is
not safe my darling, and I should 
be in agony about you constantly
Dont! do it at least not now. If
those horrid red devils strike, it
will be the last effort, and a
desperate venture. It will be only
to die game, as far as they are concerned
but they will leave a furrow of
blood behind them. No, no, my
cherie, you are not to go there
at present. I wish you had sent
me the letter from your RalphI cannot forget those soul lit
eyes, and might swear by him
Ah my life, my sweet heart!
if there is a man in this whole
world worthy of you, may all the
good angels send him, to rescue you
from this weary lift. It breaks my
heart to see you, hear you knowing
what your life is. I tell you my
own life causes me less heart 
ache then the contemplation of
yours. For me it does not
matter, my race is nearly run
for you it matters every thing
you are far too precious to
be flamy like incense in the
winds. You cannot live in this way,
your individuality cuts into your
very soul, like sackcloth upon
shrinking flesh. If you could only
lie down and fall asleep in
anothers consciousness, and give



your panting, quivering vitality
a little rest, but you never do,
never can. Your non absorption
prevents that. I wonder every
energy of your soul is not long
since exhausted. I wonder your
intensity has not burned you
up. There is nobody in all the
world like you, my beautiful 
darling. I am hushed into happy
silence when I am with you. 
I see you disarm judgement by
your charming ways and overpower
all coldness and criticism by 
your magnetic attraction and for
a moment I think you are to be
envied for this great power
And so you would be, under certain
circumstances and in the right place
you are not in that place now
I know it quite as well as you
and therefore, and therefore I tearmyself with distractions over
you. I have seen a deal of the
world - on both continents. I have
never met anybody before with such
a strong high soul. I study you
enough - when away from you my
pet, when I am with you. I live in
you. I smile over our intercourse, there
is no repose in it certainly, but to me
it is of the delicious, self sustaining
sort which never wearies or exhausts
one. Perhaps I tire you to death. if 
I do, you are cruel not to tell me - 
Let me know your plans. If you 
neither go abroad - or Calafornia what
say you to spending some weeks here 
in the summer. The climate here in
summer is perfect never too warm  If
you could tear yourself from the sea, there
is no better place than this. Here you
should live just as you please, no
one to molest or trouble in my house
you could ride on horseback here to your
hearts content. There are lovely spots here-
abouts.  
My whole heart to you.
S. F. AustinMilwaukee May 12th
Wherefore dumb my priestess that
I must pelt you with words
until you cry hold, and send some 
tidings? Did you get the letter
I sent after you to Rochester?
I dreamed a lie last night sig
that the postmen brought me
a letter. You have scarcely been out
of my thoughts today my pet why
cannot I get at you at will
I am all alone in the house. not
a sound except the [?] telling 
the hours. I want you, oh! how I
want you my darling! I have been 
in the depths all day and my
heart turns wearily to you for
comfort and rest. I want you to tell
me you are not going to California
the lying vagabond newspapers
say you are and I want to be at
rest over that [?]. Dont you
dare think of such a thing now
are you at home and resting?
[*My precious love, good night
S.F.A.*]I trust so. You need it badly
enough. I wish you could sleep
a week, without dreaming, that
would be rest. Mrs. Metcalf fears
you are ill, thinks few would 
have written otherwise. I told her
of the piles and piles of letters 
you had to read and answer every
day. I could have choked her for
suggesting you ill. You did not
see that unhappy wretch S. B. Anthony
in Rochester did you? I read somewhere
that she prevails in that 
society. 
The enclosed slips will 
edify you. Did you waste
so much breath talking to that
[?Ass] in Louisville. I will not 
believe it and that boquet and
card and am I on the scent of the
Saxon? If he did settle upon
you there. Oh dear! oh dear!
Tell me this minute. "I am



all yourn", oh, When did you
part company with Mr. Bernard?
Will you tell me something?
Now. [?Profound] this on Sumner
I hope he is divorced, the idea 
of that woman having any claim
on him. You may marry him
if you insist upon it I am not
sure but I should like it if
you went here the tother, nor the
tother. Alas! alas for the "tea
rose." and teas you, and over
that summer day. Look here.
I have a dawning suspicion that
the happiness which appears to satisfy
other people, and which is equally 
within your grasp, seems so prosaic
to be worth grasping. to you I have 
had my attention directed to this 
subject of late. A man creature
asked me why you "do not 
marry somebody." "Somebody"!
I said. "Yes there are plentyof men." There are, I said
slowly, as if considering it.
Alas! there is no denying that. 
plenty of nobodys. but a 
Somebody. Lets see him. 
He looked dangerous and I did
not charge again. was not worth
the amunition. That's just it
my dear. You came down from 
your high horse. think what a 
glorious privilege it is to have
a man. It does not matter
who - anybody. I wish I could 
pile jugots around a few people.
Lucca is here. singing mignon
tonight. I would like to hear just
one aria in that. If you were 
here, we would have assisted. 
What of the new plan? Does it
grow? Will you devote yourself
to lettering just ten minutes and
send me the results. The children
send [??en's] of love and beg you
[*to come here this summer*]

Milwaukee March 9th
711 [?] St.
My darling girl
I had no sooner
sent my letter to you to the park
yesterday when voila! the postman
brought me yours of March 4th
causing my heart to jump for joy
and explaining the silence which had
become so intolerable to me. Your
conjectures about the Boston P. O.
must be right as no line from 
you has reached me from that point
Your last letter (previous to this one)
was mailed Amsterdam. My [?]
[?] bless you for every one of the 
precious winds which stirred my
sluggish pulses and sent the blood
coursing through my veins with 
new life. My fever left me in such
a torpid state that it had begun 
to seem that nothing had the power
to awaken one emotion of interest or
rouse one thrill of expectation within
me. I am no spendthrift of your precious
gifts my sweet one. Every one of yourstrong healthful words drives cobwebs
from my brain and inspires me with
new courage to live my life - 
I am glad to hear you even scold
my sweet. Even your accidents and
mishaps by flood and field are
delightfully piquant as if with
all the disagreeableness, you had 
wrung a sort of enjoyment out of
them.  If all the expletives weren't 
exhausted, I would abuse this writer
also. I have nearly frozen to death
here had neuralgia to a degree never
before experienced "all along of the
cold" If we have whirled through 
the tail of a comet as the scientists 
say, I don't believe much in the 
comet that could not warm us up
a bit, do you? 
I am glad to know something
definite with regard to the 
book. It is a nice story. I'll
stick to that and if all the
trash which is published pays
I should think, a story like this
one, so pure and fresh and natural



would be so rich. However 
I am not disappointed in the 
result. I would like to hear 
Jule had the pleasure of "seeing
her work prosper" but there is
no help for it. What you tell me
of Miss Faithful amazes me. It 
seems impossible to believe she
could be so utterly dishonorable
sorry she is a woman. So I 
never hear of the Doggetts, much as
I would like to do so I like 
them both so very much and
I know Mr. D. is a man in ten
thousand. Your strictures on Lucca
made me laugh and would so
delight Bruno I think I must
send the letter to him. He generally
designates her as "that beast"
Do you know anything of her life, my
dear? I am coming to the defense
and propose to stop your mouth by 
telling you something of her story.
She was born from & among the lower orders
a Bohemian. You will never knowhow low that is until you see them
over there. She was taken early in life
to Vienna the most dissolute city
on the Continent where she became
the mistress of an Austrian officer
of rank of course who had her taught 
and among other things, music. She 
entered upon this life, before she was 
old enough to realize or understand
the sin or shame, but as soon as she
found she had talent, or genius, (hardly
the latter, I admit), and could take
care of herself, she left the life she
was in and struck out for herself
And the way was beset with obstacles
enough and she knew both privation
and want in minor theaters, where
her part was often that of soubrette
She has made herself what she is - 
her fame, that of the first dramatic 
article on the Continent. A fine person
she is not, but a brave indomitable
self contained woman she certainly is
She had no helps over there, I can 
tell you. For anybody in the lower
[??ers] to presume to rise is a grave
offence against society & even the
Government. Bruno's hatred of her
is that of class. Now, what do you

say to her? Her marriage was a 
mistake as she has found, probably
before this. Perhaps you do not know
how it came about, and was no less
romantic then the rest of her career
One summer found her in Baden Baden
one day she was watching the
roulette tables, where fortunes were
being made and lost, among the 
latter a German Baron Von Rahdin
lost enormously and in perfect
desperation exclaimed "Ah! my God
Who will help me?" "I will help 
you my countryman" replied
mademoiselle Lucca, touched
by his distress and she paid his
debts and he proposed to her and 
married her, out of gratitude 
perhaps, with the consequence to himself
of being obliged to leave the Army
disgraced beyond redemption by marrying
an Opera singer and complete estrangement
from his family. She has gone on
paying his gambling debts ever since
but they live happily enough I believe
I have seen them together often and he
appears fond of her. His family hearnever recognized her in any way.
And now, Anna, for Madam Lucca
is an artist. She is, as you say, a 
creature of passion but who but she
brings to her work such intense dramatic
fervor, such manifest individuality
If she plays Gretchen ten thousand 
times, she feels every note of the text
and the music to ends of her toes
Her Gretchen is Geothe's not Gerards
There is no fine ladyism in the text
no opportunity for it in any thing like
a faithful rendering of the conception
of the just poet however much of her
own personality Miss Sillism managed
to infuse into it it was false and
forced. And then, Lucca does not sing
or play to the audience, she sings to
the people on the stage, as her business
is. I am so disgusted with Kellog
and others of that genre, who rely merrily
upon their persons, for effect upon
the audience whose smiles, grimaces
kisses, etc are mistaken for art.
I would have these burnt at the stake
myself, every one. I have heard better
singing in Europe, much better, than 
Madam Lucca's, but I have never seen
better acting there, upon the lyric stage
till you see Lucca in the "La Africanerin"
If not, and if you have the opportunity , do 



will you? In one character I do not
not like Lucca her "[?Terliver]" in La
Traviata is vulgar with just a touch
of the license of her early life. I always
want to shake her in that.
When I see you we will have it out
on Lucca. Oh Anna, will you come here
I know you wont! I have lived on
that before and what came of it?
Of course I shall come to you if you
want me, to the end of the world. The
pleasure I have in life is not overwhelming
that I should forgo this if you want
me.  I did not go to hear Lucca here
as I never can go to any public place
without encountering Mr. A with his creature
sitting in the most conspicuous places
in the dress circle. It is not the encounters
I dread so much as having every opera
glass in the hall leveled at me to seehow I stand it. Just as people go to
funerals, to see if the "mourners
feel bad." I never hear any music, and
there is nothing I need or miss so much
There is nothing to me like music for
casting out devils. When are you 
coming West? And when will 
you know if you can come to 
me. I am not going to count
upon it I tell you, for I am
a poor creature and cannot 
bear disappointments
A kiss and love to you
my darling
S. F. A.



Sep 5th
My precious dear
I am so hungry
for a word from you that I can
no longer restrain my hand. I hunt
over the columns of every newspaper
which comes in my way but
find nothing but exasperating
squiks. I know of course it is far
too early to look for anything
official. If it is true that Clara
Morris is ill and unable to 
fill her engagement, what then? I
so hope it will be you in her
place. I send you a clipping
from the Chicago Times of today
which might be worse, as well 
as better. Hard on Kate, though, 
Is your Annie Boleyn finished
Oh if I only knew where youare, and how, and what doings
if you have not the time to tell
me just a wee bit, then set 
Mr Bernard to lettering from
me. I am sure he will. 
I hope before this you have seen
that splendid Mrs. Chatfield, whom
I only envy in that she has been
able to serve you so well. I just
love her, and treasure her more than
I can say. She deserves everything
from every friend you have, my 
dearie. How did your find the
mother and Sue? How have you
been as to health? That is of more
importance then anything just
now. Have you any thoughts of
Paris, for the wardrobe. How I 
wish you could have an ocean
voyage in CA the wind is
always favorable for outgoing
steamers, and the voyage a quick


one. I think of you constantly
with such love and longing, and
pray that all rough places may
be smoothed before your feet
I feel through and through that 
you are on the threshold of a 
great success. God grant it!
I have decided to break up
housekeeping for the winter at
least. We go to Mrs Colt's as I told
you. I think now I shall make
the change about the first week
in Oct. Bessie sends her 
heart to you. Tell Mr. Bernard
I hold him in faithful remembrance
and will add my blessing if
he will write me a letter.
Sweetheart take care of the little
body The soul will take care
of its self. 
My whole heart to you
Lovingly
S.F. AustinMay 29th
My darling,
At last I have your
letter. It has seemed to me I
should never hear from you again
The telegraph was some relief, but
I knew you were ill. I never need
to be told that. I can feel it and 
I have worried about you night &
day. I knew from Mr. Chamberlain
(bless him) what you did in
Chicago and how you suffered
Yes. I thought as much. "Alas
for him" I echo. A rare soul
his. He has written me the loveliest
things about you but somehow
I cannot pity him as I do this
one. Whose letter I enclose. Anne
darling, do write something to 
him. So loyal a friend isworth keeping, and you remember
you promised he should know 
your summer plans. He has
written me perfectly frantic letters
What could I say to him? Poor
soul! What you tell me of your
European plans plunges me into 
all sorts of worries. I have thought 
and thought the whole of last 
night. I realize fully just how 
you hate to ask any body for a
loan, but this man of whom
you speak should be generous
enough to make the matter easy
for you. Yes, I would ask him
in such a strait as yours
unless you must give your soul
into his keeping, as recompense
You cannot do that. I hear he 
is going abroad also. Is it true?


Ah my darling your letter is full
of mental and physical pain. I
wish I knew everything about it
and you. Do you want me to go 
with you? You know I am ready 
to go with you to the end of the 
world always, be anything, suffer
anything for you. There is nothing
in the way of my going except
the children. I am as well again 
as usual, perhaps not quite as
strong but able to do everything
as before I was ill. To go with
you I must break up housekeeping
and provide the children with
a home. I believe I can do this
with a little time. I have to get
Bessie's clothes ready to leave
of course, but there can be sewing 
women found I suppose.Would you expect to leave before
the first of July? You must tell
me exactly what you want me
to do, and if it is possible I
shall do it. I shall leave no means
untried. Only my darling let me
know at once, a few days makes
a great difference to me. Have you
any other plan, which does not include
me? If so my darling, and it suits
you better, never think of me You 
are not to be bound by anything
you have said before, in relation
to taking me with you, I shall neither
be hurt or wounded by any change 
of programme. You are to do what is
best and easiest for you, what is
cheapest also. I insist upon this
my darling. A New York paper makes 
you sail June 9th with Jenny Van
[?Lovett]. Is there anything in this?
You must tell me just what you
want and how you want it. Only 
let me know at once. There is so little
time. Ah if I could only see you



In Julie's last letter she said "If
you and Anna would only come
here this summer I should be
perfectly happy" It is right
funny as I have never told her
we thought of doing so
The children are well. Bess 
says "If Anna wants you Momma
you must go." She is a dear
unselfish child. Bernie is away
so he knows nothing of this as
yet. but I know he would insist
upon me going. Mr. Chamberlain
always writes as if it were a fixed 
fact that we were going abroad, but
I did not think he had any
knowledge of your plans.
Now my dear, I have said my
say on the subject. Do you
say yours. Don't think about
me if you have any other planwhich promises better
The box came safely and the
contents lovely. Bess went into
extacies over the dress. She sends
a heart full of love and thinks
it was lovely of you to send me
the oven dress. I need it my
dear, and I look fine in it also
How good you are dearie to think
of me and mine in the midst
of your cares and worries.
I hug you and kiss you a 
thousand times. If it so comes
that we do go abroad together
I shall try to make you have
a good time, wont I thought?
What does the little mother 
say? Give my love to her
and to your sister also
Let me hear from you at once
darling. I cannot tell you how 
excited I feel over this.
My heart to you S. F. A.

May 30th
My darling
I have this moment 
your "bit" note of the 27th
You have received mine before
this of course. I have also this 
one, which I enclose by the
same mail. Read it, will 
you. You have heard tell perhaps
of "pleasant summer reading"
Well this is not that kind
You will have to found a lunatic
asylum for your victims my
dear. Somehow, that man's letters
shakes me to the innermost
Do you think Chicago could 
suffer in that way? I speak
not. Do you think there aremany people who could or 
would, so hopelessly so self
forgetting. God knows I have
little enough faith in human
kind, but where a soul fries
and friggles in the fire, and 
utters no plaint, my sympathy
goes out largely. What am I
to say to the creature. Will
you write him? Even so briefly?
So [?], five times, anything
I wish I did not care for
all this. I am waiting in the 
greatest unrest to hear your plans
to know what you will have me
to do. I am ready to do any
thing possible. Have you seen
B. yet? wish I could. I am
just desperate over your

condition. Don't you dare work
unless you are able. There is
money somewhere in the world
which is of little consequence
compared with your precious
life. You must get enough of
it in time to save health 
strength and youth, somehow
Of course ask him. Why 
not. You will pay him 
if you live. If you do
not, he can't harm you
in the beyond. You see 
the moral obliquity under
which I am laboring, do
you not. Well, well
Anna, my well beloved 
God knows best after all
and it will all comeright in the end. Give
love to the mother and
"Sue" I would give something
to get at you today.
Bers eyes grow humid
over you, and she say with
quivers in her voice "poor
dear Anna"
God keep you my 
own darling. 
S.F. AustinMiss Susan E Dickinson
If our dear Anna
should be too ill to read or have 
read to her the letters which we
herewith enclose pray do not
disquiet her with them. We
could not wait the reciept of
your letter - were too overjoyed
by the hope which your telegram
gave us. Please use your discretion
about showing to her
our letters - we will trust you
have some left you and freely
confess we have none, being
quite beside ourselves with
contending emotions - joy for 
hope of her restoration and apprehension
for her. Do join your
solicitations to ours to induce
her to come here as soon as
it is safe for her. Do not think
it would be any burthen to us
the pleasure it would give us
would be ample compensation
Beside we desire to see yourself
Have threatened to make a journey
to Philadelphia for that purpose.
AustinDec 13th.

My darling
I have not anything special
to write about, but my heart is so
hungry for you I must needs send
you a line in the hope of a
return message. I wonder if you
are still in New York protracting
the good time. I think I would be
quite content to vegitate the balance
of the winter if I could have you
three days. If I could only live
three days. I see by the papers
the Beecher Tilton mess is in
the Tafois again. I have always 
feared so your friend Mrs. B. 
would be drawn into it. I do so 
hope not for I like her because you
do, and cannot bear any of this
mud should bespatter her white

[*ill with [?] trouble. I shall be forlorn enough when they
are done. With dear love always S.A.]
with [?]
love
always
S.F.A.*]garments. Why dont that wretched
beast B. go hang himself? 
Your discription of Brad laugh
was sufficient for me, so I had
no longings in his direction
when he spoke here last week.
He comes up from Chicago to
hold forth again tomorrow night
"Cromwell & Washington" The
papers both here and in Chicago
laud him to the skies. I suppose
he is like every other Englishmen
I never saw one who did not imagine he
carried the world on his shoulders
Prigs, every one. The ladies are 
better, ever so much. I hate English
men so, it was with the greatest
satisfaction I read in one of 



Julie's letters last summer of 
one of them - of high rank - a visitor
at Ems for cure. His malady
being a fancy that he was in the 
family way. Think of it one of that
sort taking care of himself for fear
of consequences - and talking about it
I like that, uncommon. By the
way Jule torments me to death about
our coming Is there anything to
be said about it? She wants to
know in reference to her plans for 
the spring and summer.
So I have not written the Col in
ages. I am not going to write 
men creatures. When you won't speak
to him and he is a lunatic about
it meditating suicide or writing 
poetry or something else equallyalarming, why then I come to
the fore, and smoothe his yellow
mane, which makes him feel
better. I am determined to keep
him for your friend, whether you
will or no. I know he will serve
you faithfully in time of need,
therefore I do not intend to let 
him free as long as there is any
prospect of your needing a friend.
Since writing you last I have been
in Chicago one night. I went down
with my sister to see her daughter who
lives there. I had a hankering after
the Rev. but gave no sign. I do not 
care to see him until I know first how
it is twixt you and he. Yo are the 
most exasperating little wretch. I beg
and beg to know if you are coming
into the latitude, and you wont 
answer me. Bess sends her heart
to you. The Metcalfs are about leaving
for Texas for the winter. Aulie has beenFeb 28th
Sweetheart
I am sick and forlorn, but 
thinking of you so constantly I must
write a line perforce. The dreadful cold is
followed by a terrific wind blowing from
the Lake. damp and raw and cutting as
a knife the same sort of weather to which
you succumbed last spring in Chicago
I have been ill in bed with horrible
neuralgia of the hand and heart, have
got myself into a wrapper and down stairs
today or the first in some days. Ah
my dearie I wish we had a little 
cottage on the Mediterranean Sea somewhere
with plenty of books and a few
friends. one, would do, just somebody to
help, if one of us should die. That would
be blissful for me. I am so tired of work
of people and things. I want only you, only
you. And in such a spot you could write
books. The living sunlight would be abundant

[*thousand times. Tomorrow is Bessie's birthday She is fifteen. I
wish I could
make it a 
[?] day
for her, but
alas
With dear
love
S.F.A.*]inspiration, and both words and thoughts
would come at your bidding. It is almost 
a year since we were together in St Louis
How charming it was. I would endure the 
suffering and all the miserable finale to
live those days over again with you. I
had a line from the Col. a few days since
he is sick, and unusually out of sorts,
I suppose it is because you will not 
speak to him. Although he does not say 
so. I have not replied to his missive for
the reason I have been too miserable and
hopeless myself to give comfort or cheer
to others. He enclosed a newspaper clip
which said you had relinquished the 
idea of the stage over which he seems 
greatly to rejoice. I had another newspaper
cutting lately from Philadelphia with
the news that your "sister had made
her debut on the lecture platform in
Scranton." Tell me is it true? I was so 
surprised never having heard she contemplated
such a step. I hope with all my heart 

that it was a success if she did go before
a lecture audience. I am very anxious to
hear what the world is going to say of
your new lecture. Where will you speak in
New York? I have been reading about the 
acting of Sarah Felix Rachel's sister in
Paris. She seems to have some of the passion and fire, if not the genius of her sister. She 
is playing Joan de Arc and with great success
it appears. I heard [?] sing here last
Act I never thought much of her singing and
on this occasion she did not sing half as well
as Mrs Van Zandt. [?] is not a true
artist and if she dared behave in any 
Continental City as she did here, she
would just be hissed, that's all. She never
sings to people on the stage as is her
business to do, but always to the audience, and she was disgustingly vulgar 
in her acting, not to say wanton. The
English Opera is ridiculous anyway. Who
wants to hear the words, which in ourtongue can be only silly, and absurd
It is the music of Mozart which one cares 
to hear in Don Juan not the words and
only to fancy Rilling singing for half an
hour "I would and yet I dare not, for fear I
might repent. I never went to hear English
Opera again or R again, for that matter
The Metcalf's are in Texas enjoying roses and
strawberries and other dainties. The climate
is perfect and they are perfectly well
The Beecher abomination occupies the public
here as in New York  Will it never come
to an end. The [?goings] will not agree of course
and then it will have to be done over again
or left just where it began. I think if Bowen
[of] ever comes on the witness stand he will hold
the key to the position. What an enterprise
for Beecher's friends to try to blacken
Mrs [?Moulton's] character. I am glad her husband
is so loyal and true. Write me sweet
whenever you have the time and heart for it.
The question you ask "If my lovely has brought any
pleasure into my life" seems so strange to me
dearie. I do not think any body ever thinks of the
doing such a thing but you. And I am content to have
it so. Bess sends her heart. I kiss you aDec 12th
My own love
I have just received 
yours of Dec 7. Something in the
spirit of it trembles me so that
 I cannot refrain from writing you. 
That you are overworked and vexed
in spirit I have no doubt I have
felt all winter that platform work
of all kinds must be a failure
financially. The structure of the
times shuts people's hearts and
pockets also. [?] [?] had no
audience here, and nobody else has
tried it so far. The idea of you
speaking to a lot of swine and 
then not getting your fee. I cannot
bear to think of you going about 
beating up game like a hunter Dont
you do it my darling. If you had any 
heart in your work, it would be quite
different for the truth's sake, if
you had anything to say to people
you would not mind poor audiences

[* there are good times coming to you at
least. I am
better in health
then when 
I saw you
last. Here
[?] headache
Children
send 
oceans
of love
God keep
you my
dear love.
S.F.A.*]or poor pay, but you have nothing to
say, that people are ready to hear now
must you go on so all winter? If you were
anybody else I should not care so much
As it is, my heart is just torn with thinking
and thinking of you. Where is the book?
You just concentrate yourself upon that 
and let everything else go. I saw a 
notice somewhere that it would be soon
forthcoming. I hope and confidently expect
everything from that book. About the 
stage plan my precious dear I am
unable to judge. I would not hinder
that you know. I would help you with
both heart and life. [?] ought 
to know what you can do there
and if he had kept himself out of
the gutter could have helped you
to anything. But now until he 
cleanses himself, you can have nothing
to do with him. It makes me shiver
to think of him going to see you Ever
You must have a dragon to protect 
you if you are to see him again. What
if he should dare renew the previous
modus operandi? Could you kill him?

Don't let any body see him with you
Remember the enemies lying in wait
and do not let the dear tender heart
run away with the clean head. Oh dear
if I could only be with you. What you
tell me of the final settlement of the
home affairs comforts me, but what a
swindle you had to stand. You did 
not tell me what I long to know more
than anything if you are coming west
I have something to tell you, that 
Kate Doggett is in the lecture pile
that she wishes her name to be 
pronounced frenchified Dogga &c
A Chicago gentleman told me so
Maybe he lied, but he declared
he did not. I could see that he
hates her plain enough. Said she was
"laughing stock for all sensible
people in Chicago." Contemplate if
you are physically able that 
hatchet skewered face on a platform
that beanpole figure arrayed, maybe
in red velvet. Oh dear! oh dear! 
I always thought her a subject for
a lunatic asylum, but did notknow she was idiotic before. Oh the
vanity of the creature! Wouldn't Will
enjoy seeing her on the platform?
What will she discourse about? There
is nothing in the "heavens Earth or 
waters under the Earth" she does not
claim to know but as she affects
extreme juvenility in dress and 
deportment she ought to talk sentiment
like Celine for instance. Enough of her.
Write me when you have settled anything my
darling. What I want is for you to get a pile
of money and then away over the seas. I wish
I could help you. I wish I lived in New York
I believe I could do something for you there
Think of that saffron colored Stebbins wishing
she was God! Oh dear! words do not cost 
anything and the poor little wretch does
not pay her bills. If she would "share her
last dollar with you," I fear the prospect
would not be enlivening for you, in case
you were hungry. Oh how I wish I had 
you in my small house just for one day
I long to take you in my arms and shield you
from every thing that hurts but with this 
tugging at my heart strings. I must sit 
[*here dumb. Never mind*]20th September
My darling
I wonder where you are
and what doing his Sunday night
I have been thinking of you the
whole day, and longing for you as
I always do, unspeakably. Oh my
girlie if the weary Earth spaces could
be compassed and a poor little forlorn 
woman brought to your side if only
for an hour how blessed it would 
be. Your last note to me had various
meanings and mixed comfort. The 
darling hope of being with you, seeing,
hearing, and touching you for months. Ah 
me! what a heartache it was to give 
it up. I never had quite relinquished
the hope that something would turn up
at the last moment and the way
smoothed before you. God grantcould have been sure of being able to provide
the needful bread and butter. but I presume
that without any hesitation or misgivings on
the subject, he counts himself able as well
to supply your spiritual needs - your spiritual
needs, who have outgrown him by a full
century. Poor idiot! How dare he marry you.
Somehow, and most unfriendly I know, he fell
flat in my estimation when I read your
words. That he should worship you afar off
the sweet sybil who had touched him with
gracious words. I can understand, but do wish



my dear love that it be not the 
mothers end of earthly life, which 
holds you back. Somehow since the
Col took the field, I have hoped 
still more strongly. I know he 
will do all that is possible
all that emotion and energy and
force can do. He wrote to say he
had heard from you and verily
a new song was in his mouth - 
a new heavens and new Earth made 
for him by one little letter.
Of Chamberlain! I expected such 
a dinoument. I do not know that
I am even sorry for him. Men are
such queer animals. I do not
suppose he would have offered
himself to you unless he

to make you his wife! that man!
Bah! I am glad, so glad, you
and [?] are reconciled
That is a gain and recompense for
the summer's disappointments.
All future work will be easier
after this for you. You did not
tell me a word about the book.
Julie sends dear love, and is 
[?] and howling for us. I have
written her not to hope for it.
Write me how the mother is, and
of your sister. Are you all 
together? Bess sends her 
heart and is always asking
with wishful eyes. "Shall we ever
be with our darling Anna"
I hold you in my arms my 
one love. and cherish you in 
my deepest heart. S. F. Austin. 

Nov 11th
My darling
I have yours of Nov 6 
this morning, with notice of your 
Boston lecture enclosed. That's something
like what it ought to be, and greatly
rejoiced my soul. That and your
letter cured me. my head has been 
in a regular rampage for the last
ten days keeping my mostly in bed
This horrid lake shore climate
is slowly killing me I believe, but 
that's no matter. its the lecture and
you that I am thinking about now
and you had such a splendid 
audience, a Boston audience
Nothing 'cept hugging you would 
do me so much good as this. 
I could just embrace that [?]
if he has red hair. I wrote you
the other day to Elizabeth City
evidently the letter had not reached
you, or you would have had my

[*Bess sends her heart*]sage? opinion about the [?]'s
benefit. Can't be reconciled to it
no how dearie, but after this I
will keep still, if I must
Tell me, do your friends, real friends
in Boston and New York approve 
of this? If they do, why then they
do not appreciate you. that's all 
Anna darling. It is because you
are apparently so unconscious of 
yourself and what you now are, 
that I lift remonstrant [?] in
this matter. I want you to stand
upon the pedestal where fame has
already fixed your character in
everlasting individuality. You 
are as much a part of the times
and events of the last fifteen 
years, as Charles Sumner to
Lincoln. The little woman who

writes you this and others who love and cherish
you will sleep in oblivion, but you will live
on criticized, reviewed, and estimated, whether
you will or no, by the readers and thinkers of
coming time. Do you even think of this my girl?
I trow not, but it is true nevertheless. Now
when you go to England I do not want you to
come before them as a woman who has tried her
hand at various things, but as the embodied
genius of the American platform, if you will
A woman with a history, who has never lowered
her gaze from her fair ideal. Mind dearie 
I have no objection to the stage if you are supremelygreat thereon. And that you would
be I have no doubt, but first go
where you can see the stage at its
best and no matter how little its
real gain may be to you in 
needful preparation. You will have
the [?] so necessary in America
That atrocious animal Kelley was
a nobody until she caught the 
eye of Prince of Wales in England.
In spite of all our boasted independence
we only echo the opinions of the 
transatlantic critics in [?] and
follow their lead. 
Concerning the plays of which you
speak I know so little of them I can 
have no intelligent opinion. I know
almost nothing of the American stage
Plot & Passion I do not know at all
It sounds sensational. Adrienne is 
better I should say. I should say Mrs
Bullard would be a judge of the
best one. 
Are you going South this winter?
or are you coming West? Am I not
to see you anywhere. I wish I knew
anything about you. About myself
there is nothing to be told. Nothing
comes to me, at least no pleasure
except what you give me. I have 
for the rest only the daily compensation
of my good children.
I wish you would come here for a 
few weeks - why are you not. I 
will make you comfortable at
least, and you shall follow your
own desires. You could work on
the book here. How glad I am
the book is going on again. You 
just finish that, and then see what
the dear God has for you to do
next. I suppose you read of
the ovation to [?] the
other night in New York, my 
dear your fame is better than 
hers, and more lasting, I would
have [?] her, but onlyin joy that it was the last
of her really and truly.
When you are in New York
keep your eyes open and tell
me what old women like me
are wearing now for outside
garments, will you? I want 
something don't care what, and
as I never go anywhere, have no
idea what people wear. 
Do tell me how your mother is
and that beast Beecher bought 
[?]  $1500 picture did he. He
had better have given the money to
some of his victims. Do you ever
see B.B.? What of [?]?
Poor soul! Col sent me a little
poem the other day, a nice little
bit. [?] Ah dear, and oh 
dear! Why can't I get at you?
I have a thousand things to say
[?] love to you S. F. A. Feb 21st
[?] Wisconsin [?]
My darling
I have yours of Feb 15th The
letter you speak of having written me previously
I have never received. I am so sorry. Your
letters lift me from profoundest depths
I should inflict myself very often upon you
to procure this help, only that I decline 
to bore you. In one respect your letters
are most unsatisfactory. Why do you
not tell me something of yourself? I am
always [?] for news of you, and you
tell me almost nothing. As if it in
the least mattered how or what I do
I am sick of that subject. Will you
straightway betake yourself to lettering
and tell me something about yourself
[*Julia is having a lovely
winter and seems very
happy. She is not as
well as I could wish
but is no worse, then
before her
[?] She has still
very much trouble
with her heart but is
so petted and spoiled
that she must be
happy. She speaks of 
you in almost every
letter. Have you any
intention of going abroad
I would be willing to
live several years less
if I could go to Europe
with you. There I could*]The newspapers say you are "going to
the stage, going to make your debut 
in Chicago." Is it true? I don't believe
it And yet, when I see [?]
(and she reminds me of you always)
I think how much better you would
do in her place. I do not know if I
want you to go on the stage. There are
such wretches there. and they would
have to touch you. You would never
think of that I know, and never feel 
it. but I fancy you have a friend
who would, and you must never 
hurt him. Ah dear, if I could only 
fix things! Do tell me something, 
If I must tell you anything of
myself, since writing you last I have
gone to housekeeping. I have taken a
little house, furnished it comfortably
and the children and myself enjoy each
[*a great deal for you. my Anna.*]

other, and enjoy our freedom from all
boarding house observation. My friends
here are heavenly good to me and never
forget me. I used to go home in the first
days of my housekeeping and find all
sorts of things, creature comforts, and 
luxeries, the only clue to which, was
"a lady came in a carriage and left
these." The dear Metcalfs have gone to
[?] for two months. They were 
all more or less ailing and Julia very 
miserable. Now about Jule's book. I
have written to Mr. Reid who answered
me he would do all he could about it I
have some [?] chapters of the manuscript
which I will be obliged to revise a 
little and copy. The translation is for
the most part excellent, only sometimes
the sentence has a German construction
verb at the end, which must be changed
I suppose it would be of no use to sendit to Mr Reid until I have it all. I think the book promises 
to be charming. When I wrote Mr. R. I sent him a little
sketch of my own, which Prof. Richards insisted I should send
was even kind enough to write me about it after he left. He thought
so well of it, he was sure other people would. Mr. R. seemed to
have thought I intended it for the Tribune, and wrote me their 
columns were so full of political and other matter, they could 
not give it a place. He advised me to send it to a [?]
I did not know whether he read it or not. Should think not as
the manuscript was only in New York a day or so, and he all
the time in the Custom House investigation. Perhaps he did read it or
look it over, and did not like to tell me it was worthless. I wish
I knew. It would have been such kindness to have told me frankly
well, well I have done nothing with it having no frith in getting
anybody to send it unless it would be through some influence
Now my darling, you know enough about me. Will you write me
[?] love to you
S. F. Austin 

222 Prospect St. Milwaukee
Oct 21st
My darling
Yours of the 17th
reached me yesterday. And you
are no better Oh dear! Do get
Dr Thomas at you and obey
his directions. I know what
it is You are worried to 
death, over this, that, and the
other, and you will be no better
until the anxieties which beset
you are laid in some way
My dearie, if the mother is in
tolerable health dont vex yourself
over her unrest. It is natural to
persons of her age. And she
probably feels it less then either
you or your sister who see and 
love her. In spite of all you say
I wish I could take care of 
her. I know I could, after a
fashion. And my patience and
love should be unfailing, foryour sweet sake, if for no
other reason. The expense of boarding
in New York will be enormous
I fear. And unless in a family
while there are no other boarders
difficult to secure either quiet or
rest. How I wish that dear Mrs
Chatfield could take her.  What an
intrigue about that boy. The idea
of her great soul being tortured in
that way. 
I have lost heart and hope 
over Daley. What does Bernard say
now. Only if Saint Benjamin
will put his shoulder to the wheel
then all will be well. I will
trust to Mrs. Chatfield to keep up
his interest in you, in spite of 
all your naughtiness.
How I wish you could come here
on this Sunday lecture course
So far, the audiences have been
splendid. Julia Ward Howe comes
next Field had a good house
here, but not fifty people in



Madison. Where Vic Woodhall held
forth the same evening to a crowd.
I presume he was disgusted. Mrs. Field
goes with her husband. The Metcalfs
entertained them here, and were very
enthusiastic over them. Mrs. Metcalf
and Julia go to New York tomorrow
for a visit of some weeks. 
Just now we are having perfect
days, soft and warm with pleasant 
odors in the air. I presume it 
will not last long I look out on
the waters of the Lake just under
my windows and wish it were
the sea, and we on it, going away
from worries and vexations of 
soul. I believe Julia is fairly
broken down at last. She is not
permitted to write letters and when
I heard last, staying in Berlin to a get a
little strength for the journey to Italy
I fear the end is not far off to her
unless she is speedily helped.
What a muddle it all is, this 
miserable life.The children enjoy our present life
very much. The family are very
kind to us. And try to make us
feel at home. I think the change
a good one for us all. The relief from
care and housekeeping worries is good 
for me I know. Bess sends dear love 
and thousands of thanks for the dress
which has not yet arrived. The dancing
school is a good thing for her. And she
does not in the least mind, not being
dressed as much as the others. They
have public hops every friday evening
If you really will not wear the dress
of which you write and do not care
to give it to any body else then my
dearie I should like to have it but not
if you will wear it yourself, for Bess
always looks respectable and that is 
all I care for. You should have seen
how magnificent I looked the other night
on the occasion of the coming out party
of Senator Carpenter's daughter Bernie &
I were invited and I went in order to 
make him go. I wore that white silk
with polka dots over a black silk
skirt and it was just lovely. Mrs. Metcalf
said one of the handsomest dresses in the
room. It suited me somehow. I had my hair


dressed and wore white roses in it.
I was felicitated in my "french dress
which of course my daughter sent"
etc. I told the curious women kind
the french dress came from you 
with all of its belongings. And 
I never loved Mrs Metcalf so much as
when she said "Miss Dickinson is the
noblest and best woman I ever knew"
Are you glad I dressed up and 
went out of my shell. Altogether
I had a pleasant evening. Bernie
looked so handsome and behaved
himself so well I was congratulated
on all sides over my "splendid boy"
If you chance to have among your things
any bits of old velvet will you send
them to me. I am getting out a sleeveless
jacket for Bess and have come short 
of material. The velvet is old and 
new will not do to go with it.
And look you my dearie, whateveryou send I wish to pay the
express upon. Please let me have 
my way in this. You have no idea
of the great good, the things you send 
do me. And I can afford to pay 
double the express. And I think 
beside, I should have more self respect
if you would let me do that.
I wrote the Col the other day
a brief epistle. Give dear love to
mama and Sue. I know there
is a very pretty woman here, called 
Mrs Parsons, but have never met her
Mrs Miller I have never seen. Would Sue
like me to call upon Mrs Parsons?
Do you know a family by the name 
of Stuart where Greeley died?
They have lately come here to
live. Give my love and admiration
to Mrs Chatfield always. And most 
cordial greetings to Mr Bernard.
I love you, my faithful darling, with
my whole heart and life.
S.F.A.



Milwaukee Oct 3rd
222 Prospect Street
My Darling girl
I have had so much 
to do in the last weeks that letter writing
even to you has been impossible. It was 
dire and wearying labor to break up
even my small mercy packing
and suiting, sewing over old carpets
and fitting them What vile work it all
is! anyway, I have been in my new
quarters three days, and have nearly 
settled to my new life Don't know how
it will work, but if the children are 
only content I do not mind, for myself.
From my windows I look down upon the 
waves of this great Michigan sea. And 
I like that vastly. I shall have less care
and shall be warmer than I was last 
winter, and if the ladies of the
house are not entirely to my taste shall
try to make the best of it, for the other 
In addition to the other tasks I am
[*"bushels of love." my whole heart to you S.F. Austin*]getting Bess ready for dancing school
which has already opened. She was very 
unwilling to go, thinking we could so
ill afford it. but I made her and
strange to say she rather likes it
Of you, my dearest heart I cannot hear 
enough. Am glad the little book will
so soon be out I do not see why you
should not have both fame and money
from the books, my dearie. They are much
more worth one's while to read than other
books which have brought their authors 
both in abundant measure. I have no
doubt it is as you say, however that the 
book trade is especially dull.
I hope before this, you will have seen that
[?] and made terms with him. The 
papers say [?] has cancelled his
engagement with him. The stuff about 
Morris makes me sick. God forbid
you should ever have to descend to such
claptrap. Your [?] and most 

worshipful and worshiped (on my part)
B.B. has been three days in this city
lately. I was just dying to see him, but
alas! "So near and yet so far." That 
poor darling Mrs Chatfield if she has
to endure the transfer of his affections
with the rest! It is too much to ask 
of her. I think relieving him of his money
would be easier than that. Altho! I do
adore him. I hope Mrs. Chatfield is better
in health then when you wrote me lately.
 Make her take cod liver oil, if she has a 
good stomach. It is the best of anything
for such troubles as hers. I cannot
take it, having no stomach.
I have a pleasant letter from St. Louis
two weeks old, which I have not found 
time to answer. Evidently he is no better.
He says you are good to him and so, he is
lifted to heights not otherwise attained by
him. Poor fiery heart! What is the use 
of it all? What is the use of anything? 
I hope your mother and Sue will be
located without trouble to you. naturally
at your Mother's age, she is a little changeable
How I wish I could help you in this, my
darling. Old people always like me, and
I have a talent for getting on with them. 
I would be more happy than I can tell 
you, to have your Mother under my care
and so relieve you of anxiety and all
worry about her. If I could only see the 
way to it the will would not be wanting. 
I am going to write a line to Mr Bernard
soon. Give him my heartiest greetings.
Bess sitting here with wistful eyes says
"Do you ever think we shall be with our
Anna Mamma." I think it is the one 
thing in life to which she looks for
recompense. For all she endures now. She is
in school again, but never well and 
never happy. Do not leave me long
without letters. If I could not hold 
fast to you I should give up this 
miserable business of living. Bess sends 

April 5th
My own darling
Will you either 
telegraph me or write me one
line to tell me how are you
I think of you all the time, and 
worry, worry in a way not to be
described. I have had two letters
from Mr. Chamberlain and two
from St Louis. I trust the letter 
has some news of you before this
or he is frantic. Mr. C aroused
in me such anxiety about your
throat confirmation of all I feared
that really I cannot be still 
and wait your time to speak as 
I generally do. How is it my pet
are your numerous [?] all going
to indite epistles to me, about you
I cry mercy in the outset, [?] equal
to it no how. What did you 
do in Chicago? Tell me that 
[*is full beloved. Too full for anything except
silence
and tears.
God
keep you
always
dear heart
S.F.A.
Children
send bushels 
of love*]after my children. I thought of you my darling with a
dumb ache of the heart I cannot tell you about.
I wanted to see you so, but never mind it is all for
the best and I have forgiven other peoples meddling
That horrible book. "His marriage vow." It is simply
indecent, without the glazing over a frenchman would have
managed to disguise nastiness, that's it just. I was 
never so mad at a book before. I actually let it drop
from my hands scores of times as if it were some
unclean thing. You don't pretend to say the Rev. C. is
Mr Elms or supposed to be, or supposed might be!
Don't told me that! And the metaphysics and the
spiritualism, and all the rest of it. What stuff it 
all is. If a woman wrote it she ought to be burned 
at the stake. She must have written out her own
sensiousness I am sure. I am sure I should never



Very tender and [p?ting] speaks his 
Worship of "our friend." Did you
really smash his poor heart? If
I could but get hold of you. I would at
least give you opportunity to confess
and the t'other one, mercy me! What 
is to be done with these creatures? Am
I expected to pour oil and wine into
wounds of your making? I actually
shiver when the postman comes, lest a
new victim turns up. Pity my list
was not ornamented by the one who
sits up half the night a kissing
of your picture. I think I could comfort
him. Anna I am really laughing
the first time since I left you. I have
had a horrible time but am gaining
I sit up half the day now, and begin
to feel as if I were alive again.
I cheerfully heard a friend tell my
sister, that the Dr said I would
not live three days, I thought well
it does not matter if my work is
done, then somebody else will lookdare ask a gentleman what
he thought of such a book. I should
be ashamed to let him know I had
read it.
My own dearie, I do not know
if I told you in my last, that the 
box came safely, but darling why 
did you send all those things. I was
perfectly dumb when Bess spread 
them over my bed. Did you go on
to Philadelphia in your night dress?
I think you must have done, for as
nearly as I can remember you sent
the entire contents of the big
trunk. What did you without a
[?] I would like to know!
Of the contents of the letter Bernie
brought me. I have no words with
which to bless and thank you. Bess 
and I cried together and the Dr's bill
which was tormenting me, vanished
like a phantom. Ah my love!
my love! God will reward you
for all you do to the sorrowing
one's of his great family. my heart Milwaukee May 23rd
My dearest Anna
I have been hoping 
for a line from you these many
weeks. A friend of mine sat opposite
you at table in Chicago lately
and reported you looking well. I 
puzzled my brains over you being in
Chicago with your sister and devoutly
hoped you had not fallen by the
way, causing your sister to come to
the rescue. Meantime the News papers
say you are not going to England.
Is it so? I hope not, unless you
have some very good reason for a 
change of plans. 
You have doubtless
not heard anything of him of late. I fancy him so grieved 
and disappointed in these insane Frenchmen whose cause he 
so warmly espoused. Was there ever such a collapse? I mourn
for France but despise frenchmen. I wish you could have
seen Paris before this wanton destruction of her beautiful 
places. I have nothing new to write of myself, no change
in the condition of my affairs. On my return I shall 
do something for myself, somehow and somewhere. I have wrought
very hard getting Julie ready for her new life. I shall have still
her dresses to buy in Germany. Silk dresses, with my limited
means, out of the question in America. In case you do not go, can
I not bring you something from over the sea?
Let me hear from you as soon as
possible. With a heart full of love for you.
Always yours
S.F. Austin

heard Mr. and Mrs. Doggett are
in Egypt. I cannot learn when
they intend coming home.
Julie and I
sail the 8th of June from New York
Is there the slightest probability of
our seeing you. Where shall you be
at that time. I would like so much
for Jule to meet you before she
leaves. [?] so hope you will sometime
go to visit her.
You promised to send
me the direction of your friend
Reid in New York. Will you?
I shall return immediately do not
expect to be gone from here more
than two months.
Tell me all about 
yourself. There is nothing I would like 
to hear better than that you are well
and happy. How is your friend. I doDirect 222 Division Street [?] [?]Milwaukee  July 18th
My own beloved. It must have
been my guardian angel who told
you how great my need has been 
of you in these last days. And
the "special reason" of which you
speak has not been wanting, my
darling. Though every hour of my day
brings me some thought of you, more 
or less interim and pervading, yet
my need of you is much greater at 
times than others. I turn from every
thing which wounds and stings
me to you. So it is granted me in
spirit to look into the depths of 
your calm eyes and feel yourstrong hands upholding me, I 
am content. You are always much 
more of a real living presence
to me than people I see every
day. And so and so my own
darling I strive in a dim and
somewhat uncertain [?] to [?]
your image with all that I can
feel of loftiest beauty and
truthfulness and so, find comfort
for the inner loneliness of my 
heart. I think of you at work
and alive in your hot dusty city
how I wish I could be with you.
If my wishes or prayers could

help any there would be few
rough ways for your tired feet
to pass. I never think for a 
moment that there is any thing
in me of worth to you or
any body now. I feel as
if I had been dead a century.
but I should need to be more
than dead. not to thrill and
flush under the assurance of
this most precious letter, that
you do love me a little. And 
with loves sweet logie by which 
all things strange can be made
to appear quite reasonable I grow
proud of being something to youand arrogantly try to persuade
myself that it is quite natural.
Do you remember Mrs Brownings
Sonnet beginning "First time he
kissed me." I can understand 
the spirit of that sweet thing.
I do not expect to remain in my 
present position longer that the 1st
of August. I am weary of equivocating
and covering up the rascalities of the 
man for whom I work, to say nothing 
of not getting my salary. It is so
easy to cheat a woman. Perhaps 
I can find something else to do. I hope
so, if not, we must try to keep our 
souls and bodies together on the 
forty dollars Mr A sends me monthly
for the children. It will be an 

interesting problem for me to solve
House rent, fuel, provisions, clothes, &
school bills, on forty dollars a 
month. Well, one thing is sure,
much better people have lived on
less. I am very anxious to keep my
boy in school this winter. He needs
a little more education in order to
be a business man, but if I cannot
get anything to do, he will have 
to go to work. He is manly, bright
and energetic and much more
earnest than boys of his age. 
Bess is a dear little thing, and going
to be very handsome. My children
are the greatest comfort to me, and
are thoroughly good. So you seesweet heart, I have something
still, in life. I am rich in friends
and I am going to be brave and
hopeful through all discouragements
Did you know Anna Marble was
married? and have you heard
about the wedding?
I have sent the book to Reid
and hope it may find favor, but
I am not sanguine about anything
anymore and expect nothing.
Oh Anna, if it should succeed and
if it should happen that I could go
on to New York to correct the proof
Don't you see, my darling that would
bring me to you. There, I'll take
a few turns up and down the room
to settle myself. I am a fool yet
But with my whole heart, yours. 
S. F. AustinMilwaukee Sept. 15th
711 Cars Street

My darling Anna

Thanks for your 
faithful love which makes me 
your debtor for two letters. I wonder
if you felt I was sick and
needed you sorely. That you were
so good to me. I have had a
sharp attack of fever which kept me
in bed two weeks. It was rather
jolly in the whole for part of the
time oblivious to all suffering. I 
roamed in my Sorrento, and drank
anew of that most intoxicating
chalice of delights - form of Italian
days. Oh Anna will you never go
there, and find your days and
nights full of sweet meanings
before undreamed, in this prosaic
life. You wont, until I am dead
and then I shall not know you
have been born again. Yes I shall
[*and love you dearly and am not utterly desolate 
having you.
Faithfully. S.L.A.]though, and more I shall be with you
then - if I have passed the portal called 
death. Ah well my sweet. Life's fret
and worry will be done sometime.
But what is it vexes your sweet soul.
Can't you make things go right? You
are quite right in saying it is only 
the little things which irritate and
sting us out of equanimity of temper.
Any great calamity brings a sort of
dignity with it sufficient for its
support. I wish I could have been 
with you in your season of being
"cross as two sticks." I could have
taken you into my arms and kissed
you into peace my pet. Don't worry
over the book I know it will come
out all right. I wish I could help
you with it. And your other work
the paper's say you are to make
your own engagements for the
winter much better if you can,
but the worry of it all. You are
tired out my darling. Let work go
until you are rested. If you are

so near to God as among his
glorious mountains, make the most
of it sweet. Keep still, and hear
what the mountains say and to
all your doubts and questions, will
come answers of peace. Don't I know
it? Do you read George McDonald?
I wonder if Robert Falconer would
be like a new revelation to you
as it was to me, and do you as
much good. You do not need it 
as I do, to be sure, but I am sure
you would enjoy it, no less.
I was glad to hear you went to
Swampscott, you are fond of the
place are you not? I remember
what you told me about sitting
upon upon the rocks there. Only my
own darling in my care I should
live among my ghosts again
in your place.
I have heard nothing fromMr. Reid yet. I can well
understand how much he is
occupied, and the distractions of
his campaign life. I am glad 
you are not in the [?]
perhaps it is because I feel so
little interest in it myself. I [?]
hate Grant, but I do not know
that my faith in Greeley would
move mountains. Matt Carpenter
is screeching for Grant here abouts
and seems to make it profitable 
in one way. i do like his wife 
though ever so much. 
Keep me advised of all your movements
my darling and know there is now
hour of the day I am not thinking
of you. I wish you were here, we
are having perfect weather and
your could write and study in
my quiet little house to your
hearts content. Blessings on your 
dear true heart. I hold you fastMilwaukee Nov 11th
711 Cars Street
My darling, I had lost sight of
you until I chanced to see you
reported at a reception given Miss
Faithful in New York, the other evening
Tell me about her. I have done taking
newspaper estimates of people. I heard
a good deal about her through Miss
Arnold, (niece of Mathew Arnold the
poet) an English lady whom I knew
very well in Germany. Meantime
what the papers do say of Miss F.
is amusing. "Here is a woman, who
does not parade on platforms and
explode in theories, but one who does
what she holds woman can do in
her best estate" &c &c You and I know
very well how easy it is for a woman
with wealth, rank, and influential
connexions to do things, such twaddle
makes me too mad for anything.
I am sick tired to death and disgusted
with newspapers in general. The filth
and billingsgate and profanity of the 
[*faith in every body else, my darling girl,
Faithfully
S.F.A.*]American press, during a presidential 
campaign is a disgrace to the country
I fancy you are disappointed in the 
result of the elections. I knew the 
West would go overwhelmingly for
the idiot who occupies the highest place
in the nation, brains are as a discount
nowadays. Now we are to have another
regime of jockeys and sporting men
I don't care, life is all a muddle 
anyway. What are you going to do
this winter my sweet? Is there any
hope of you coming this way? I have about
dispaired of our seeing you. No such 
pleasure is coming to me. I am gradually
hardening into a state of negation, but
today I received a glove [?] from a 
dear dead hand, a sweet girl whom I
met in Switzerland, whether she had gone
from health, but come home to die. Her
mother sent me the glove all the way 
from Walla Walla, Washington. [?] 
I had a good cry over the letter and the
glove, and when anything tugs my
heart Anna dear, I turn instinctively 
to you. I wish I could look into your
sweet soul, my darling long enough to

rest myself. I am so weary and sick
and helpless. It is hard to play at
summer with winter in the heart. I 
guess I am weak and wicked. Any
how, I wish I could get at your
dear loyal heart! I do so long for you
at times. Your letters are very precious
but I want the real living presence
I can do nothing for you, except perhaps
to be faithful and loving and tender
enough to fill the loving part of 
your nature with the protecting care
and tenderness you sometimes crave, my
darling. While to me you are every
thing and from you I should get
strength to live my life. I see the
abominable newspapers have trumped 
up the old story of your engagement 
to Whitelaw Reid. Don't you dare to
marry anybody. There are no men who
cannot be made [stups?] for fortune's 
finger. none. How funny that I should
think of Mr. Doggett after writing that
That patient good man. Where are they 
Do you ever hear of them? Ah me, how
many broken threads I want to pick up
with you. there is plenty of room foryou in my small house and why
can you not arrange to come here
and stay a while. You are not
always on the wing, take a week
from home and come to me. What
of the book? Could you not manage
to be a paid correspondent of two or 
three newspapers and in that way
go abroad? Miss Brewster supports
herself handsomely in that way, even
affords the luxury of a pair of dogs
and a maid. Did you read H.H's 
"Bits of travel?" Perhaps now that
the election is over, Mr. Reid will
find time to see if anybody will
have the book I sent him. I wrote
Lulie that nobody would look at it
until after the election.
What a horror this [?] fire is. I
thought of the distinguished foreigners
who are here and that that would be
confirmed in their opinion, that a
gigantic fire is a sort of past time we
indulge in periodically. Have you
seen George McDonald? Have you
seen and heard Lucca? Is her acting 
not perfect! I hold you fast my
[*darling, with waver[?]*]June 2nd
My darling
It is very hard for me
to forego the pleasure I had so coveted
from your visit. I do not calculate
much upon anything nowadays, my 
heart is pretty thoroughly steeled, but 
I found I had been setting this same
heart in order for your coming and
my watery eyes as I read my
disappointment proved what it is to
give you up. Don't delude me with
promises about the Autumn. I do 
not believe it. The Autumn seems so
far away and I wonder if I can
live so long anyway. Ah, well, it does not matter, nothing matters any
more. 
Where are you going for the 

[*and profit in a thing like this. I know just where to go, and how to
do it. And with Jule and her clever husband to help. All places would be open to us. 
Have you ever thought of
a plan of this 
kind? Do you
know I have some
hope of Julia
coming next 
year for a visit
I want you to 
meet her husband
immensely. He is
entirely to your 
taste in somethings
Jule does not yet
appreciate him*]
will pay you handsomely I would do it so dirt will
ever cling to your white robes, sweet, however they may
trail over foul places. I want you to get rich, at least
rich enough to be at ease about the future
Have you any plan for the story.
I have finally got Jule's book copied and ready to send
off. Shall I send it to Mr. Reid? He wrote me he would
do the best he could with it. But now with all he has
on his hands, do you think he would trouble himself about
it? It is a charming story and well told. Not in the 
least sensational, only a fresh wholesome story of German
life and delightfully natural. I know you would like
it ever so much. The book has passed through several 
editions in Germany. if you think it necessary and can do
it without trouble, will you write a line to Mr. Reid


summer? I have expected you would
be drawn into the Presidential Canvass
I am right glad you will not work for
Grant, we have had enough of him
goodness knows. Neither do I see
how you can work for Greeley. What 
Mr. Phillips says of him covers the
whole subject. If he would only declare
himself for or against anything and
stick to it, but his record is very
discouraging as far as hope for the 
future goes. Nevertheless and
notwithstanding I honor him for what
he has done, in his day and generation
and so do you. The world is better 
for his having lived in it. And of 
how many can this be said with truth.
He seems to me to have a great boy heart
and little worldly wisdom. You 
will work for him yet, Anna dear, 
I feel it. 
About the book! if the creaturesdo remind him of his promise. the
title of the book is "Embers under
the Ashes." by Gustav Baron Von
Puttitz. If I could possibly afford 
it, I would go to New York myself
with it. I should like to see Mr. 
Reid and some other people there
Perhaps I might find something for
myself to do in the meantime. I
know there are things I could do there
and do tolerably well, and I am
not very conceited Anna, am I?
If I could only take my children and
get out of this town. i would rather
half starve elsewhere than live where
my children's only inheritance is their
father's disgrace. Anna cannot you pick
up some young ladies who would like
to go abroad for study and travel
a few years and who would like me to
take care of them, and of you also
darling. I tell you there is great pleasure

[*with my whole heart all yours S.F. Austin*]

intellectually but will grow 
to him in time, is growing now.
I have always wondered how
she could satisfy him, but 
she does, fully, and he is 
desperately in love with her
Ah how I wish we could go
there, you and I together
Can you not make it possible
in the way I have indicated?
You can have no idea how glad
I am to see the "End" of this 
book I have copied. The weary,
weary hours I have spent overit working half the night
after my usual labor during the day
and when I have been half
sick the whole time. It is 
no small "job" to copy a 
whole book to say nothing
of revising it, turning and
twisting sentences where the
construction was abominably
German, tearing up and down
the room in desperation trying 
to study out obscure meenings
Ah dear, I do not wish to
repeat the process immediately.Milwaukee April 17th
711 Cars Street
My precious
I did not come home
Tuesday. Why? I'll tell you dearie
After I left you that miserable
night - going out into the darkness
and storm, (in more than one sense)
I went to bed and had a big weep
which lasted all night. I was so
cold and hungry, wanting my darling
I do suffer when I once give way, in
such a dumb fashion, so horrible
to bear - giving no outward sign
but tearing  body and soul, that it
literally slays the body. Consequence
sick all Tuesday - bound head 
and foot such mortal agony of
headache - as I have seldom endured
I fretted and fumed but had to
stay in bed and get able to travel

[*"I am all yours!" Ah dear! if I could only fix things
I kiss 
you
and hold
you fast
in dear
faithful
love
SFA.*]I telegraphed the children and
came on the first train yesterday
Bless you for the dear note awaiting
me! how thoughtful and good of 
my girlie. You knew I would be
all at sea. I am just an ungrateful
beast, flying in the very 
face of providence, and all that
for I have lived enough, and enjoyed 
enough during this fortnight to last
me a year. I know I should be 
satisfied and content. But how
would it be if one were admitted
into Paradise only to be thrust
out and have the gates slammed
in her face? So with me. I will
possess my soul in patience later. 
Now I'll let drive a book across 
the house. There, that relieves
me somewhat. Bess looks up
in speechless wonder, asking

"what is the matter?" Yes, my dear
I did say a few things to that
unwashed Israelite, which seemed
to impress him. He was awful
polite to me and urged me to 
go on to St Paul with you. If
I could have forced it into him, that
it was permitted him, to sanctify
his entire life by carrying the 
trailing garments of the dear
angel with whom he was traveling
I should have been satisfied. I 
rather like the creature
There was a female in the car
yesterday who was in a state of
gush over you. She talked as if
she had been your most intimate
friend all her life. If she had
not been so intolerably vulgar
and course I should have
asked her about your audienceat Prairie du China I wanted 
to know dreadful, but not enough
to overcome my repugnance to hearing
your save upon her lips. I wanted 
to put my foot in her mouth. Every 
time she spoke of you, she informed
the clothes pin is when she was 
holding forth that you were going
upon the stage - and was under
contract to Edwin Booth etc. etc.
Just here I stop to groan. 
Now my pet, can you come through
here on your way? Try - you promised
me you know. I shall live upon
that hope until some word of yours
knocks me down. My own darling
if the dear Lord lets me be near
you forever and ever.
What do you hear from home? The
children send much love and beaming
thanks for the things you sent them
Bernie is already deep in the book- Milwaukee Sept 30th
Dear Anna
Thinking you might
be foolish enough to go to New York
to see my wandering family and
fearful if you did so you might
not find them I thought its best
to warn you against so insane
a venture or appraise you of
the Change in their plans -
They were requested by a friend
who expects to meet them in
New York to go to the Astor 
House. I shall not go with 
them being detained by 
business engagements. I shop to see
you soon either here or else
where. When this storm of
hurry and excitement is over 
I am proposing to have a
talk with your Sister. Dickey
Mrs Metcalf leaves for New Y.
today to meet her husband
who is to return from Europe
next month. Thus we pass
too and fro upon lifes stage.
Yours truly
AustinJune 27th
My darling
I have your letter of
June 24th. It was such a relief to
hear from you that I feel as if some
strain had been loosed from me. What 
with my own anxieties about you and
the Col's letters, which came thicker
and faster, and which do stir me up
in spite of myself I am in no very
enviable frame of mind. "My fiery
friend" indeed you little wretch How 
dare you say such a thing. Perhaps you
can manage to elude him, when he goes
East but I do not believe it. What do
you think he says in one of his last
epistles? He exhorts me to "Encourage 
you to go, help you, not hint at any 
obstacles or acknowledge any" Says "go
go and if you need money draw on me
then mother shall be cared for - any thing
for the life and health of that poor dear
girl" What do you think of that?
[*my love to poor mother and sister please, I owe the latter a
letter, which I
shall write
before 
many days
I like her
vastly -
Keep up
your courage
use people
let the 
creeturs help
you. What 
of B.B.?
My whole
heart to
you.*]
S.F.A.sure of it anytime. Does your land bring in more than
that? I want you to go away from all distractions and rest
To that end, you must be willing to sacrifice something if 
necessary The "Estimate" you ask me for is difficult to 
fix upon. That living abroad is more expensive than when
we were there I have no doubt. Everybody says so but
for our living and traveling expenses I think two hundred
dollars per month will suffice. If you locate any [?]
for a given time we should not live in hotels you know
And if you spend the winter in Italy it would not be
expensive there. I wish I knew first how and where your
friends are invested in Chicago. I could find out the probable
worth of the property and the chances for its increase
in value. I wish the whole thing were out of the hands 
of the husband of Madame Doggett, that's all
Let me know [?] just when it must be ready [?] 

I think you ought to see him. He cannot
torment you long in any case And what 
pin [?]! And the rest ah dear
what a procession of victims will
congregate to see you off. What a cheerful
beginning to a journey. I shall be glad
when you are out of heating, away from
all these. So the book is nearly done
How glad I am. Don't worry about it 
or anything else. You cannot afford
the strength. I know it will be a success
In relation to Will Doggett, I do 
not know what to say. I did not
telegraph you for that reason. I wish
your money matters were out of his 
hands I do not think investments
in Chicago promising for at least ten 
years. (That is the opinion here) Yes I
would sell the land, you will be
eaten up by taxes. I only fear you
cannot sell it to any advantage
now. I cannot see any obection to
mortgaging it either. Anna dear if you
think it is a good investment for your
money. You could loan money at
ten percent here in this city, and beas soon as you know yourself. I
cannot break up, you know until I 
am sure, or make any preparations
to do so. I am sewing for the children 
as fast as possible getting them
ready to leave behind my own wardrobe
Do not buy things here my dear. You
will be able to get all you need 
so much cheaper over the waters, and
for all sorts of lingerie especially
that is the place. We do not want to
be cumbered with baggage en route.
Bess is well and sends her heart 
to you. She behaves sweetly about my
going, cheers me on with all her
small might. Bernie is so little at
home he seems almost like a visitor
He is well, and also willing for me
to go. The children will be in one
place together when he is here and
pleasantly located. The Metcalfs are very
anxious for me to go and will help
me off Mrs M sends bushels of love
to you. I saw her this A.M. Give  

My darling
At last I hear from 
you. It seemed as if I never should
again. And what has become of the
letter you sent before? I am furious 
over the loss of it. It is so strange 
where could it go? I am struck dumb 
over what you tell me. I must know
how and wherefore, when you have the
time to tell me sweet. I have been 
thinking in these past days about your
taking dramatic lessons of Janauschek
I have not a doubt she would do it. 
All the great artists in Europe give
lessons. Pauline Viardot Garcia there
whom there is no greater aristocrat
has always given lessons. I tell you
dear if you could have lessons of
Janauschek. it would be too splendid
Anyhow you just ask her. That will
[*little sunlight Thanks and blessings for your dear love
my sweet
I have not
much I value
beside,
meantime I
try to possess
my soul 
in patience
As ever 
my heart 
to you
S.F. Austindo no harm at least. If I were
East I would go to her myself
in your interest. She and I have 
mutual friends in Germany
and I believe I could win with
her. I know very much about her
in one way and another, and 
should not hesitate to go to her.
I have set my heart on you having
lessons of her if possible. In some
ways she is just your style.
Will you think of it my girlie
and not look at me out of the
corner of your eye as I see
you doing now, with that exagerated
picture of French drama in your
mind still. French - bah! Oh, if
I could only lay hands on you. I 
would talk you into this. When
I spoke to the Metcalfs about
it they fairly hugged me for the

brilliant idea. They have seen
acting you know both in France
Germany and America, and altho'
they are so French as you are
they go crazy over Janauschek.
Are you looking at me still? Mildly
tolerant. Now to get on, I have had
dreams of [?] in this wire. That 
if anything happened to send you
over the sea how splendid it would
be to make a descent of Julia at
Ems - Bruno has had an appointment
there from the Emperor, he is "Bad
Commisair K.K., which being
translated means that he is Governor
of Ems, having entire control of the
place. Ems is the favorite resort
of the Emperor of Germany and
Also of the Emperor of Russia both
of whom go there every summer.
It is Bruno's business to receivethe high and mighty swells when
they arrive, and arrange the Balls,
concerts, theatre's and other amusements
for the delectation of royalty
as well as having a supervision 
of the household of the royal people
It would not be a bad thing to see
the various monkey performances
of majesty disporting itself
Tell me, have you seen Stebbins? &
hast been sculped?
The children say you forgot to reply
to the most important part of my letter
vis if you will come to us this summer
They send all love. As per me, I vegetate
as usual. I sit here alone, keeping my
hungry heart waiting for you. I have no
life apart from you. I am torpid, like a
toad, and like a toad, somebody gives
me a tap, and then I hop out of the 
way, that's all. I would hop to you
this minute if I could, just for as aOct 1st
711 Cars St. 
My darling
I am home again plodding
on in the old routine. Can't say I was
particularly festive after you left me
in that beastly Chicago. After I had
cried a while without any enjoyment of
the process. I summoned Ethiopia and
sent for the newspapers, succeeded in
getting one and with it, managed to
survive until bed time. Couldn't sleep
and so lashed myself into fury over
having been sick and good for nothing
while you were with me. I don't have
you so much that I can afford to
lose the precious moments in that
way. I guess I do not thrive on
happiness, having had so much of the
reverse it may have become my normal
condition. It was a little satisfaction
to discover that the arrival of my
periodical visitor however was the
cause of my big headache, but enough 
[*The children send you bushels of love. the Metcalfs also
Mrs M. says "tell Anna
I will
come and
build a 
villa
next
hers in Colorado."
She is furious 
over the
lost letter
from you.*]of that, I arrived safely went to Mrs 
Metcalfs to dinner where being entreated,
I held forth about you for the space of
two hours to most sympathetic and 
loving listeners. How they rejoiced over
your physical condition! How they took
the Colorado fever! (from you) How 
they exclaimed in delight over the 
book! All this, that, and the other
they did and said, just as I would
have them without regretting your "want
of early education" That does stick
in my crop and I shall never be
happy until I have a chance to tell
that woman the difference between 
knowledge and wisdom, and explaining 
and expounding to her hat your inborn
genius creates spontaneously, as a necessity
unto its self. She will never find it out
in any other way, and its my mission
to tell her. Yes, you may "poke up Will
Doggett" if you can hurt her thereby -
I am a Christian today, as you perceive
Oh for Colorado where there will be a

change of animals. See here my sweet
Chaldean if you proceed with the new
plan, do not forget you are to ask your
friend just what Bernie is to study
He has so little time for study that he
must attempt only the needful. He 
is greatly elated over the Colorado idea
but fears the study, to amount to
anything, must take his whole time
which is impossible. Bess and he
have reared spanish castles of which
you are tenant and joint proprietor until
my head is no longer level, listening
to them. Oh my love, my love! how I feel
and know the wise tenderness of you
treatment of my sick soul, albeit I am
dumb when I am with you. I never think
it necessary to tell you anything, so sure
am I that you know all I would say. 
Bess says "to live with our dear Anna is
too good to be true, it is not possible 
after all the misery we have had." I confess
to a similar feeling. To be lifted to such
heights after the life I have lived for thelast years seems impossible. If I can
have you with me, restoring by your calm
power the balance of my inner forces
perhaps I shall be good for something once
more in the world. Shall we have a home
together? How royal it will be! With
health what solidity of comfort, what
reality of splendor, we can have. I feel 
almost childishly excited today over
the whole subject and forget it all
depends upon events over which even you
have little control. Take care of yourself
darling and do not lose what you gained
in the mountains. It seems to me, your will
being unusual [?] to your winter's work
And the book, the book! that is to be completed
in grand style. It is going to be a
great success, that's my prophetic soul's
verdict. I send you the hair wash, which
you are to use faithfully. I am not going
where my darling's hair grey no how. 
Send me a line as soon as you reach 
home I will be satisfied with a bit 
not if I must. Dear heart, true heart
I hold you fast. S F Austin
[*I seem to have taken out a patent for blots today*]

July 13th
My darling
Right glad to get your
wee note, although you need not
have explained the whys and wherefores
of your refusal to see the Saxon 
to me. He sent me a line in pencil 
from Philadelphia stating he had
failed to see you. Was evidently 
hurt and depressed altho' he did 
not say so, made no complaints. 
He will probably realize later that
you had good and sufficient 
reasons for not seeing him. How
are you? You did not say a word
about yourself and I do not care
to hear about anybody else. You 
were able to go out of town for
a few days I infer from your 
[*and good strong wishes could help you overcome obstacles. You
would have
easy
sailing.
Give much
love to
Miss Sue
please
Bessie
sends her
heart and
vexes her
small
soul over
you all
the time
With 
faithful
love.
S.F. Austin*]have a fuss with him any way, so there is no
harm in postponing the evil day as long as possible
It is just beginning to get afloat here, that I am
meditating going abroad. I have tried to keep it
quiet, but now I am over run with visits and 
questions. With open mouths and eyes, people say
"Are you really going abroad with Miss Dickinson?"
As if it were the most astounding thing under the
sun. People are fools. I hope you will get away
early enough to see Switzerland before it is too cold
there. It would be splendid for you to eat the
grapes in Swits Anna dear. You have never eaten 
such grapes and they would do you a world of
good. The season of Ems will be over before we

note. I am glad you were able to do
that much. You could not have gone to
see anybody if you had been ill.
I wish you were here. The weather 
is delightfully cool and you could
work at the manuscript without
suffering from the heat in the least.
I hope your sister is helping you. Apropos
The western papers are all saying
the sister will soon take your 
place on the platform &c. I wonder
if it can be so. I should be glad 
to believe she were strong enough to
do so. I am plodding on doing
nothing except getting my affairs in
shape to leave on short notice. I 
have not spoken to my landlord 
about giving up my house. It will
be time enough when I know for 
certain about the time. Shall probably

[*Interesting! The Beecher outlook.*]get there. The Emperor of Russia
and his court have already gone
They had grand doing while he was
there. wish you could have been
there to see and hear. Julie had
attention enough from him to turn her
head, but I am thankful to say 
no such results followed. The Russian
Emperor and court are there now. 
After his departure the fine birds
depart, leaving the field to [?] 
old dowagers and invalids. When
I know positively about our sailing
I shall write Julie asking if she
cannot meet us somewhere. In
Switzerland if you decide to go there
this season. You will have so little
time before the cold [?] you will not want to spare it
for Germany, with the wonderland
of Alps so near. Oh dear I wish I 
could see you, help you. Am not
going to pester you with questions. If
my thoughts which are always with youMilwaukee. March 5th
My Dear love
The Sharon from whence I
received your welcome letter this morning
though rivers of oil should have poured
through its streets, would have "blossomed
the rose" to me. Could I have spent that
Sabbath day with you, my blessed Anna
The "atrocious bed" would have been Eider
down, the "space around" perfumed with
Araby's soft air. Oh my dear girl if I 
could always be with you in your sadness
I would let "those who will," sun themselves 
in your happy moods. You are always noble,
grand and true, dear, but you are a thing
to die over, under the heavy hand of pain
or sorrow, when you are only a sweet sweet
woman. The only comfort I have in thinking
of you now is, that your work for the season
is so nearly done. This hateful work, in the 

[*married. To this end I have to do with sewing and sewing woman, All I am 
trying to do is to get her suitable underclothing. I have no means for any
thing else. And this, only by
selling little things
I picked up in Italy.
We seldom see Mr A,
and he has declined doing
anything for Julie. He 
cannot support this liason 
and his family also. 
I am prepared anyday to
find myself left with
the children
to provide for.
It must come to this
in the end. Everybody
here is heavenly good to 
one, Yesterday Julie &
I were at the Metcalfs
they talked most lovingly
of you as they always do.
Julie sends her heart to you
and scolds that I have not
before thanked you for the 
beautiful little brooch, which
she wears constantly and loves
very much. She will write you herself soon*]your experience have prepared you to appreciate and enjoy to the
full everything you see. And your discrimination will enable you
to find the true use and meaning of travel. I wish you could
join the Doggetts, but I fear there is no hope of it. Since writing
you last I have tried to remember what their plans of travel were, which
of course may been entirely changed but I am positive Mrs D
had the intention of spending the coming summer in the very
north of Europe, even Norway and Sweden. I do not like to 
think of you being abroad alone, things and customs are so
different there, you must be provided with lots of letters of
introduction. And it is just possible you may fall in with
a party of agreeable Americans. Altho' as a general thing I should
advise you to beware of them, abroad. I know of one woman, now
in Russia, (Mrs Judge Wyche of Washington Territory) who would 
be everything to you. She is delicious and has the greatest frenzy 
about you. If I could only bring you together over there. I just
howl over the impossibility of being with you myself. Let me hear
it the first moment you decide upon anything and I will do

bye ways and highways of creation, which
year by year takes something from your
life, of bloom and freshness, which should
live and flourish immortal, in a heart 
and home I [?] of, I stamp my foot
in impudent rage, over a perverse fate which
keeps you from this life, but through all
Anna dear, I have an abiding faith that
sometime, (not too late) it will stand
recorded over against a name "died and 
was buried." This must be your compensation
It shall, it must come. We cannot 
always resolve the clouds into Angel-faces
though we can be always sure the great Artist
is true to his work. 
I am most anxious you should
hold fast to your plan of going to England
Do not be discouraged, over obstacles, work
up to it if need be, and the way and
means will come to you. It will be a 
wholesome change for you, in every aspect
preparing you for future work if work must
be. You need contact with other peoples
other humanities, and phases of life. You will
enrich your life, as few ever do, because
[*With my whole heart dearest Anna. Faithfully Yours, S. F. Austinthe same. We have nothing yet from Jules
fiancee in reference to my coming. Not yet
time. I shall let you know the first moment
I hear anything. I wish you could meet Bruno
he has some most delightful friends in
England, among the people of rank, with whom
he constantly corresponds. One friend of his 
Lady Blanche Pelly, we should have met in 
case the war had not kept us from going 
to England. I wish you could know her I judge
she is delightful from her letters. Would you
not go to Germany if Jule was there, I hope
so, Ah dear! if I could fix things,
I thank you a thousand times for your efforts in
my behalf with your friend Reid. I fully
agree with you that it would be better for me
to see him, and if I do go East with Jule, I
shall certainly do so. Tell me his address
so that I may find him. If I cannot get
something to do, which would occupy me constantly
both head and hands, I shall try the magazine
work he indicated. That might be more agreeable
but it is at the same time uncertain, and
exceedingly frugative. I would like such constant
and such hard work that I could have no
time to think of myself. This seems to me, my only
salvation, my health gives way under the life I lead
now. If I had hard work to do, taking me out of 
myself. I should be better in every respect. I would 
like to tell your friend this. In the mean time I
must as Geothe says "do the duty which lies
nearest me." That is to get Jule ready to be



Milwaukee July 22nd
Sweetheart
Thanks for the little 
note. I should faint by the wayside
if you did not send me an
occasional message. I am in a chronic
state of weary over you, and so nervous
a sudden ring at the door makes 
me faint. I had a penciled note from 
Col this morning written from Saratoga
Said he had left Cape May in the 
hope of being able to find a place
where he could sleep. Evidently he
is far from health and in dispair
over you says he is afraid to write
or telegraph you, knowing it only adds
to your worries and vexations. Grows
pathetic over the disappointment of thesummer, to which he had looked
forward so long, but is patient in
his misery. Knowing the troubles which
[?] you, only fears for the "dear
life." I so long to carry your away to
Switzerland. I want you to have that
mountain air before winter and the
South. And the grapes! the grapes!
Yet a letter if you can, to the new
American Minister to Berlin
J Bancroft Davis. I believe, if he 
is the man I think, from Chicago
formerly, he's a beast, but they
all are for that matter. Of course
Americans have a right to the attention
of the resident [?] but it is 
precious little civility they get, unless
they are specially recommended by a
strong man or woman at home. 
Your letter to Fanny Lewald will not
be of the slightest use to you Bismark-
ward. She (Mrs Prof Stahr) is a fussy
old woman troubled with a chronic

and painful tenacity about herself &
her own belongings. I have met her
scores of times in society and told
her heaps of lies, for she used to
be forever asking me if her books
were much read in America 
te te Of course I told her we
did not read any other books
here. I used absolutely to avoid 
her for she was forever returning to
the subject in spite of the very 
large dose of flattery with which 
I regaled her. I think you would
fight shy of her except perhaps for
the people you might chance to meet
 at her house. No no my dear you
will have to get at Bismark 
through his own order of creatures
Rank, rank, or else, and better,
you would got straight to him
without any introduction. You
know foreigners on the Continent
make the first calls, and there is nothing in the way of
you going directly to Prince 
Bismarck. And you would be 
sure of an audience too. 
There is no aristocracy of letters
in Germany as here. Bruno
would help you to an audience
with Bismarck. Do you know
George B. Marsh, our minister to
Italy? I had a letter from Jule
yesterday in which she tells me of
the present the Czar to her. When
he left Ems he gave her a beautiful
bouquet, with a bouquet holder which
cost 15 hundred dollars. Emperor
William have her an onyx medallion
set in diamonds and pearls. 
I am going to Madison tomorrow
to stay there days. Bess sends 
her heart to you. Give my love 
to Miss Sue, and send me a word
now and then, that's a darling
In faithful love
S. F. Austin.

Tuesday Eve August 21st 
My beloved
Without special reason, I
have expected a letter from you all day
I scent it in the air, so perhaps it will
come tomorrow. My life just now is
one thought of you. If my wishes could
only help you darling. How are you? Is
the poor head and back better? I hope
so. Who is with you at Atlantic City?
Will you send me something to work
upon so that I can find out about the
Chicago land. In every Chicago paper
I read something of the Doggetts "waxing
fat and kicking" only Kate will never
be able to do the first. Either they are
"about to leave for a trip" or somebody
is "being [?]" or they are "[?] the
distinguished guests somewhere" Bah!
I wish they were in heaven
I wonder of the "little mother" and SueAltogether what Frank told me of Jule was so satisfactory and
harmonized so well with my training of her that I felt more
content with my own somewhat hard life then before And dear 
little Bess enjoyed it all, with no thought of envy in her small
heart for the fairer fortunes of her sister. Bess gave Julie a 
hint of our plan in one of her letters and this week I have a 
letter so full of joy and plans for us, that I am rather sorry
Bess did it. Jule will be so wretched in her disappointment
if we do not go She says she has "hoped and longed and 
prayed for us so that it seems it cannot be true, it is
so good" In case we should go, if you do not go to Berlin
for the Opera and see them there I think she and Bruno
would come to us in the south wherever we might be.
I send you some newspaper clippings which I think covers
the latter day abomination admirably. The western press

are with you. Tell me something of 
yourself, will you.
I had a long visit
last evening from a friend just returned
from Europe (Frank Carnes) of whom you
have heard me speak I think. He was
with us one winter in Germany and
went to Italy with us also. He spent 
some time with Julie at Ems and told 
me so much of her and her doings and
sayings. I felt I had touched her almost
He says she is perfectly lovely and is
petted and courted enough to turn her
head, only it doesn't not a whit. He was
at Ems when the Czar was there and 
was with Julie when she met him very 
frequently. He said it was something to
see, this kingly man so grand and gracious
bending over the simple American girl
who looked up at him, straight out of her
quiet eyes and talked with him just 
as naturally as to her husband.with the exception of here and 
there a Congregational Paper condemn
B without stint and consider
his statement a farce
I wish I could talk about it
with you. No use to touch it on
paper. Let me hear from you 
sweet. I have no eyes tonight
and can scarcely see the characters
I make. Was not able to sleep 
at all last night. Hearing from
Jule stirred me up so.
Bess sends a thousand kisses.
In faithful love and trust
S. F. Austin.



August 6th
My dearest love
I had just seated
myself to write you when your
note came of August 4th. I knew
the Saxon had returned home, he
write to say so. Saw your sister
in New York, recognized her by
the picture of you which she wore.
Did not speak to her, fearing you
would not like it etc etc. Let
Lander howl it won't hurt him, being
a man. Yes my dear "T.T." doubtless
is "an unclean bird." but in my
opinion B. is an unclean.
Don't you dare alter yourself for
him. No, No, This whole thing
is too disgusting. If they only

[*makes me sick to think of meeting them 
but I wont
lie or
avoid it
Bessie
is well &
sends you
a heart full
of love. 
I want to 
see you 
more than
I can tell
I cannot
hold to
your skirts
to day somehow
I am 
sick. I guess
Dear love
to Miss Sue
my heart to you.
S.F.A. *]his own place. What will Moultin say. It seems
to me now he is the key to the whole. Anna 
I know an old gentleman here from Pomfret 
Conn' formerly, who told me the 1st wife of
Bowen lived in his native place and that she
confessed on her death bed B. had seduced her
when she was secretary to him, afterward marrying
her to Bowen. What do you think of that! Perhaps
Mr. Bowen has brought this on, out of revenge,
What a fool Mrs Tillin is! Enough of this, only
if you dare speak or write for any of them
I shall come on to sot on you. 
I did not mean to write of this, but of this
There are some charming people from Berlin
Prussia at Niagara falls, en route to the 

would have the grace to hang themselves, 
the whole lot. This 
shameless thing has demoralized 
the whole land. The western papers
are all down on Beecher. The
Chicago papers to a writ. I have
seen a good many of the latter
but have not [?] the contents
Just now our papers publish the
telegraphed reports without one 
word of editorial. I will send
you whatever I can find. The 
Metcalfs do not take the Chicago
papers. The Times has been so
indecent and nasty in its
utterances. Respectable people
here would not have it in their
houses. If the truth ever does
come through all this subterfuge
and falsehood B. can go to west. I had a letter today
asking where I could be found
Now these good people can help
us to certain things in Berlin
better than almost anybody there
The gentleman is a German, his 
wife a New York girl. Now I
want to know before I see them
if we are likely to be in Germany.
They have been much in Rome &
thereabouts and could help us
lots. Have you given up going? You
did not say one word of it in your 
note today. I tell you my dear
I would not see these people, as much
as I think of them, if I thought we
would not like to meet them in Berlin.
They do not know a word of my life
since I left them. I have not replied 
to their letters even and I used to talk 
to them by the love my perfect husband.
You can imagine how I feel to meet
them now. Ah dear! If they could
only have it before they come. They are
intimate friends of Mr. & Mrs [?]
Tell me dearie, if you can tell 
me anything to say to them. It 

August 17th
My darling girl
I read your letter an
hour since with a heart ache. I cannot
bear the thought of you relinquishing
the trans-Atlantic journey. And you
must not, so long as a shadow of hope 
remains. You may be "resting" as you 
say, you have done that before, and 
to what end? You were in rude 
health almost when you returned 
from Colorado. How long did it
last? You broke down in a month
after you began work again. No my
darling. You need the sea voyage 
to produce an entire, radical change 
in your system. You need to leave 
all care and worries, all excitements
and distractions behind you and
go where you will see nothing, hearyou, and what is particularly desirable in your case is,
to get your affairs out of his hands as speedily as possible.
Anna dear why not put a mortgage on your land, if it
is increasing in value you are secure certainly. Chicago
investments are the worst possible now. Everybody says 
real estate there will be worthless for the next twenty
years. Twenty years is too long for you to wait my
dear. What is done for you must be done speedily. Why
not ask Mr D. to take your property and pay you
what it is worth, or ask him upon what conditions he will
negotiate a loan for you upon the property. That is a 
perfectly fair business way of doing things. You will be
under no obligations to anybody of whom you borrow money
where you give them proper security. Of all the friends

nothing to move your heart or excite
your sympathy in any way. You want
to give your quivering vitality a little
rest, which you will never do here. 
If you go now, you have some hope of
recovering what you have lost during the
last eight years, but if you go to
the platform again this winter with
the inevitable result, my conviction 
is you will break down utterly. I cannot
keep back the tears when I think of it all. 
Here it is almost time for you to go to 
work again and all the strength you
will get meantime, will not carry
you through a month of hard work. 
My dear we could live a month in
Italy upon what it costs you a week
in Atlantic City. That Will Doggett
treats you in the manner you say, I
am not in the least surprised to hear.
I believe he is anything but a friend toyou have I believe there is no one
who would so gladly help you as the
Col. And no one who would allow
you to feel the obligation (if such
you will call it) so little. I believe 
this mans friendship for you is honorable
chivalrous and sincere. I believe also 
that nothing would make him so happy
as an opportunity of naturally serving 
you. Have you any papers or description 
of our Chicago investments? You must
have something I suppose. My nephew 
George Hopkins lives in Chicago you
know, and his sisters husband is one
of the wealthiest and most prominent 
of the Chicago lawyers. George would
be able to find out all about your
land and would be glad to do it if
I asked him. Can you put me in
the way of giving him something to
work upon. I want you to know something

more of your own affairs there, then
you do if possible. If Mr. D thinks
your friends well invested, certainly
with his large means he could take the 
loan himself and it seems to me he 
would not have the face to take other
than legitimate interest of you.
Let Sue write him again, if you have
any scruple. How near is the book
finished, and are the terms of publishing
such as you like? Ah dear! [?]
Ah dear! if I could only help [?]
A fortnight ago it seemed impossible
for me to go with you on account
of the children. Mrs. Jennings daughter
is ill and she thought she could 
not have them. Now I have made other
and more satisfactory arrangements.
I would not tell you of the doubts
in my case, fearing you would let them add to your discouragements also.
I thought if you were once ready to go
you would not let my failure prevent
it. You must go, my darling. Do not
give it up, and do not wait for another
year. I want you to get back your youth
and health for future use. I wish I 
could see you. I hunger and thirst for a
long talk. Will you give me leave 
to tell the Col the difficulties 
in the way of your going? I have
no scruple to interfere with my
asking him to help us, not you 
alone, if that will suit you
better. Poor Col he is heart broken
over the way you have treated him. 
He says he cannot write you again
until you signify that a letter from
him"would not be distasteful"
Let me hear from you soon again. Bess
sends her heart. You have mine always.
[*S.F.A.*]Milwaukee Dec 5th
711 Cars Street
My dear love
I am too sick and
forlorn to write you today, but
I must try to answer your letter
at least. I have neuralgic agonies
in my head and face almost constantly
and, fight against it as I may,
I feel such a giving way of my
poor worn out nerve. It does not
in the least matter, except for these 
poor children who need me and
whose happiness I must try to promote
as long as I am with them. Your letter, 
all your letters, do me good. I find 
such deep enjoyment in the smallest
fragment of your daily thought and
I cherish you and follow you always
in your wanderings my darling, and
sometimes when some inexpressible misery
assails me, my longing to behold you
is very hard to put down. You must 
judge then my dear heart how difficult
it is for me to exercise any cooljudgement upon the question of your
coming here to lecture. I try to still
my tumultuous heart beats and
put myself quite out of the question
I have little faith in Milwaukee
furnishing anybody with even a 
respectable audience. There has not
been a single lecture here this winter
and no talk of any. The "Black Crook"
obtained here a week and drew
crowds. Any such performance is
liberally sustained here always, and
the people are tolerably responsive to
music if the weather is favorable
but a more dead apathetic, selfish
community is difficult to imagine.
There be some good people here of course
and I have spoken to several about
your lecture, all of whom wish you
would come, but at the same time
share my doubts about the audience.
How was it when you were last here?
That would serve as some indication
of what you might expect again
Another thing to be considered is the
Chicago man furnishing a lecture for

Milwaukee. You may not know there
is open warfare between the two cities
silly ridiculous exchange of insults 
continually. I do not know that this
has any bearing on the case, but I fear
if any Chicago man came up here to
arrange for a lecture, he would be
pretty rudely snubbed. I have told
you the outlook as it seems to me
my darling, and you must decide
for yourself. I would rather not see
you, then to have anything disagreeable
come to you here. I believe I have no 
need to tell you what your coming
would be to me Miss Faithfull was 
here the other day, but nobody invited 
her to lecture. I doubt if anybody
called upon her the fact of her 
being here was noticed in the papers
and nothing more. 
Anna! how very, very sad it is this
death of Greeley. I cannot get over it
It seems as if he was murdered.
Everything connected with it is so 
profoundly pathetic. Nothing has so 
stirred me in a long time. And I feelmurderous over the fuss they are
making over his poor worn out body
in New York. These wretches who
helped to kill him. It is bad 
enough to make a spectacle of our dead
anytime, in this case it is altogether
too sensational to be other than
disgusting. Whatever may have been
Greeley's faults it will be long before
his place is filled among the worlds
workers. I thought much of you
when I heard of his death, because I
felt that you would sorrow for him.
The children are well, Julie also, and
apparently happy. I am as usual. I 
thought I had told you long ago that
I no longer retained my position in
the office where I was at one time
employed. The man in charge was utterly
irresponsible and altho' I had plenty 
of work, I was not paid for it. It is 
so easy to cheat a women Anna, and
this wretch owes me two hundred dollars
not a penny of which I will ever get. His 
dishonesty cost him his own position and 
the New York office dismissed him, 
after losing heavily through his rascality.

I left the office the first of September
since which I do my own house keeping.
I found it pretty hard at first, but
now it is easier. My house is small 
and having very little to do with
the labor is not very hard. I do every
thing except the washing and ironing, my 
dear. Come and see how well I can
cook. Mr. Austin gives me just forty
dollars a month to take care of the 
children, and it does not make me
even bitter, to see him living in the 
greatest luxury himself, while with
this miserable pittance I must feed,
clothe & pay school bills for his children.
I hardly know how we live, but we do 
somehow. Of course clothing is out of
the question, but there are some dear
souls here who always look after the
wants of little Bess and in every
way do all they can for me. Mrs
Metcalf is an angel of goodness to
me. I do not know how I should 
live without her. I have achieved 
patience my darling, and the
bitterness and impatient unrest oflast year is all gone. I know if there
is any good thing in life coming to 
me, anything to make me less dependent, 
it will surely come. If there 
is nothing, and the future holds 
no such blessing for me, with 
God's help I shall do without it.
We are poor enough, but the children
and myself are resigned and content
with what we have, and console ourselves
with the knowledge that far better
people have lived on less. Now my 
dear you know just how I am. I 
have not told you before, feeling that
you would let the knowledge trouble
you, and there is no need my dear 
heart. Of Austin I know little. I never
see him, and seldom hear anything from
him in anyway. A lady told me she 
saw him at Adelaide Phillips Concert
with two creatures, one his mistress, and
the other her sister who is kept by Mr 
Hampstead. It does not seem possible
but so it is. He goes to all places of
amusement with Madam, precisely as
he used to do with me, and seems to
be perfectly satisfied. The sun shines into
many graves, my Anna and God 
knows best. Dear faithful love to you
S. F. Austin. MIlwaukee Nov 20th
My Darling
Your loving remembrance
of us came safely and was more
welcome than you can know. Blessings
on you my precious Queenie for your
thoughtful kindness. I've needed winter
things so badly and the ways and 
means to procure them has vexed my
soul for weeks. Bess is in a state of
rapture over the jacket. She will not
have it made any smaller because you
have worn it, that circumstance sanctifying
the whole. Every thing is just 
splendid. I am going to make myself
fine in the brown deers. One of the 
boxes was broken open, I hope nothing
was lost. I have been hoping for a
line from you ever since the package 
came, so conclude you were not at
home when it left Phil'. Am perishing
to hear from you, Except the newspaper
gleanings know nothing concerning youI think of opening a correspondence
with Monsieur Bernard, he could
tell me something of you. I had an
array of documents from that man
Bliss the other day. The Lord only
knows what for, or how he knew my
address. Bessie was so indignant
that he should advertise himself as
our agent that he forthwith dispatched
the envelop now. He thinks you
will proceed to exterminate him, root
and branch. When are you coming west?
I so long for you, it seems to me I
cannot wait my sweet. I dream of
you every night and hold you in my
arms. It is so real, but the heart ache
of waking to find myself alone, that
is real also. The one boon I crave
incessantly of heaven is to be with
you, and I try to persuade myself
the greatness of my need of you makes
my intersession something not all
selfish. I am poor enough in deserts
I know, but the greatness of my 



love lifts me somewhere into your
atmosphere. I only touch life through
you. But what is the good of words
you know all about it. 
Have you broken up at Locust St
I wonder, I want to hear of your
Canada Exploits. Look at Scribner
for Nov' There is a mild palliative
for the social evil, a dainty
handling of the same, which
will exasperate you.
Is there anything in the report of
John Hay's marriage to an heiress?
Has his brains and person a market
value also? A son of Henry
James Jr was married here the
other day to a sick fool. 
What do you think of the gauntlet
Tilton threw to Beecher. "If the
minister of this church has any 
thing to say against me, I am
here to answer" The minister had
nothing to say of course. On 
the contrary had "always lovedMr Tilton" Ah the whited old 
sepulcher! When will he be
unmarked. What of the
book? and when? I am so anxious
about the success of that book. I
can think of nothing else. 
What is going to be done for all
the working women in New York
and Phil out of employment?
In the West the panic has not
been so much felt and no such
great overturning possible.
Will you send me a word my
dear love? I am hungry, will
you feed me? Both heart
and life are as ever yours.
S. F. Austin.
The children send bushels of
love. 30th March
Where in the wide world
are you my darling? I have cried
enough over you to have some power
even over the elements I believe
What a muddle it has all been
I do not in the least understand
anything which has happened to you
Do not know one thing of your
Chicago doings. I was supposed 
to be too sick to be told anything.
How wise people are! Of course
it would have been much more
hurtful to me, to be told the 
truth about you than to have me
forever struggling to get out of
bed, and when once out falling,
struggling up again to reach the

[*he said Mr. Metcalf told him the excitement
of my 
seeing 
you 
would
kill me*]I do so hope and pray that
you may be at home. Your 
throat my darling must have
immediate rest and immediate
attention. Poor Col his wail over
your physical condition just
wrung my heart, and when he
implored me to take care of
you with my worthless self
just then vibrating between 
two worlds, it was uncommonly
cheerful. I am going to 
write him just as soon as 
I can write legibly.
I do not think you can read
this my blessed darling but
if you fail translate it all
into love for you.
Much dear love
S.F.A.



hall door, from thence to
get to you. The Dr. said I
would not live three days, and
I wonder I did the way I was
managed. Let it go. I am 
much better, and were it not
for the horrible sore mouth, caused
by the Calomel I have taken. I should 
feel that I am gaining indeed.
Now about the Metcalfs. Why 
they, especially he, told you what
he did I cannot understand. I never 
saw him after my return, never sent
a message to him. And then that
day when I expected you! Oh Anna
it nearly killed me when you did 
not come. My sister worked over
me for hours before I was anything
but a dead thing. Never mind it 
will all be explained sometime
I can live waiting for you as I have 
often done before.How sick were you in Chicago and
what of Rev SSC whom I owe a 
letter on your account, and what of 
the frantic Col who wrote me twice
I could not even read the Atlas
I was so ill. I have read
them since and they are good
loyal letters. I heard you 
saw him after in Chicago
I hope so and also hope those 
wretched body snatchers did
not worry you to death. If you
can find the time to tell me
of these things then I would like
to know otherwise I can wait.
Of the plan a hint of which you
give me in your note, I shall
hear in good time. Bess was
made sick over her disappointment
at not seeing you, and sends her 
whole heart. I only saw Bernie a 
moment after his return, was obliged to
go directly away again. I fear he did 
[*not encourage your coming*]Nov 28th
My darling
I was so glad of your
cheery note from New York. I have
had so little of you lately it has
sometimes seemed as if you were
growing away from me entirely.
I hope you are able to enjoy
all the pleasant things your
hostess can bring you. I wish
I knew her, then I could imagine
all you do and say there. Do 
not let the theatre going tire
you dearie. You had better leave
it alone. I was disappointed in
Kate Fields want of success. 
I thought she had genius enough
to make a fine actress. How merciless
the critics are to her. If it were 
[*you are the only sunshine my heart ever has
Bess sends
her heart
mine is
always 
in your 
keeping.
S.F.A.*]day, and like all festival days
to me haunted with ghosts. Bess and I
are all alone both trying to forget in
a novel which we read aloud buy turns.
Outside a pitiless storm half rain half 
snow, dark enough for [?] at midday.
We stopped reading to talk of you, and wish
you were here, then it would be a thanksgiving
indeed. We are going to dinner at Mrs 
Jennings, at six o'clock and shall see
half a doz stupid people in whom I have
not a particle of interest.
Let us have Robert Emmett by all means

you, I should be miserable
How glad beyond all telling I
am that you have given up the
[?] benefit. You are a dear
good child. Wish I could see 
Clara Morris. The "Times" speaks
well of her also I see. Tell me
what has become of Ralph Meeker?
You never speak of him. Has he
gone dead "all along of you."
Why will you not give me a 
crumb to live upon? I have asked
you any number of times if you
were coming west this winter. I 
want to know if I am to see you or
not, or else I do not want to 
hope or think about it. Now you
just tell me. This is ThanksgivingI know you can do something
splendid with him. And if 
it will secure large audiences
and large pay I shall be
content. I send you a clipping
about Reid. It is Matt Carpenter's
lovely work of course. Not very
graceful for him to quote himself
It was he who said Reid was 
arrested in New York for wearing
men's clothes. What upon earth
do you suppose the Metcalfs [?]
to that beast for? They must know
how vile he is. It cannot be on account
of his wife, who is a nice little body
but only a negative wearing good
clothes. I cannot understand it with 
so much money and the power to have
just the society they desire. Do 
write me dearie, and know alwaysMilwaukee Jan 4th
My dearest dear,
Your letter of the
29th found me ill in bed
where I have been for the most
past two weeks with such an
attack of neuralgia as nearly
parted soul from body. Am
for the first time better today
and feeding on Quinine. The
holidays, always miserable
days to me, so thickly crowded
with ghosts, have this year been
full of unutterable physical
torture. This vile climate and
my hard life will finish
me, probably the sooner the
better. But enough and too
much of myself. Dear heart I
was so glad of the letter and

[*[?] 
is a [?]
character in
the play 
"Schellie's
Amalia
[?]*]
only reproachful and desirous
far more and more. You do tell
me so provokingly little of yourself
Only that I know how you hate
to write details. I could not be
patient. Your excuse for not sending
me a Xmas greeting is too chased
Anna darling. Bessie's eyes filled
with tears when she read the words
"because I had no loving thing to
send to you and to Bess." "I think
she has sent us enough" said my
little maid" A sentiment I very
strongly endorsed. So if you please
never again keep silent for such 
a reason. You do not and cannot
know what your letters are to us.
Now about plays. I know so very
little comparatively of the English
Stage. It seems to be there are
very few in which there is a
character great in its self - except
those Ristori and Janauschek
have made familiar - and are in
consequence rather hackneyed. Of
all those, I would rather see you
in Deborah. Next Iphigenia by
Schiller. But what would suit
you infinitely better than all is
the character of Duchess of Marlborough
in the play I gave you "Glass of
Water" and that must be in
English I am sure. It is a well
known historical passage in the
reign of Queen Anne, and I have
no doubt it is an English play
translated into German. If you
could find somebody to play Lord
Bollingbroke to your Duchess
I know of nothing which would
suit you so well. The whole interest 
of the play centers in the word
warfare and intrigue between thetwo principal characters. The queen 
being a fool anyway, is of little 
account in the play. There you could
have splendid dressing grand poses &
all the sets, passion and ambition
of the power behind the throne. I
know if you could read the play, you
would be content with the role.
I am sure Mrs Bullard can help
you to find if it is to be had in 
English text. It may not be known
by the same name in English.
I had a little package today from
the Col, some trifles by way of
Xmas remembrance, and a very pleasant
note. I am touched by his thought of
me, so unexpected and so delicately
proffered. He is such a noble hearted 
fellow. I cannot write you a cheery
epistle today my darling. Am too [?]
and miserable, but I love you with 
my whole heart, which longs for nothing
so much as to clasp you to its self. I need
you sadly. Bess sends a heart full
of love. Faithfully, 
S. F. Austin
[*[?]*]22nd Feb
Dear Sweetheart
I have rheumatism
in my right shoulder and arm
horribly, with stiff aching fingers
but I must send you a line in 
spite of it. Your letter gives me more
content than anything which has come 
to me in a long time. Since you are
at work again then verily you must
be better. Don't overdo it dearie, keep
fast hold of all you have gained by
the silence and rest. I am glad you have
struck home on that subject. High 
time somebody did and I am especially
glad of the book. Are you still with 
Mrs Bullard? From some wrappings
directed to 5th Avenue Hotel I thought
you might be there. I think you could 
do Beatrice splendidly Anna dear. 
I do not know Adrienne in the
least. I wish I could see it for then
I should know whether it would
suit you or not. I do so hope &
pray you may be able to persuade
Wallack, for he would be ableto bring more elements of success
to you than anybody else. I wish
I could see him. Don't give him up, 
bring all your magnetism to bear
on him. If he resists you, he is
worse than stone, and I hate him.
Ah Anna what can I say for the 
lovely suit and hat? Bess looks
so pretty in it and wanted it so
awfully I have it to her, beside
the poor child  needs it. It will
be her very best rig for spring and 
you would have compensation from
the loving thoughts of us, could you
see her bright face. Would you
really not wear anymore? I do not 
see why, for it is perfectly fresh and
you can get nothing handsomer to my
taste. Then such a lovely soft gray
as this. After Bess got a little better
able to look after me a little I took
my turn at being sick. A cold
which settled on my lungs of course
and I nearly coughed myself to
death. I cough enough still, but 
am better. Another winter like this
will finish me. The mercury here
was below zero, for fifty consecutive
days, and for weeks registered 26
& 28 degrees. The cold cut like
a knife. The [?] best has been
the greatest comfort to me.
I have wanted to talk with you for
a long time about Bessie's studies
and as you do not give me any
hope of seeing you, I will tell
you now something about them. 
She will graduate a year from
this coming June having taken the
whole course. Except the Latin. I
would have been glad to have her take
Latin but she thought it would be
better for her to perfect herself in German
She speaks that perfectly of course, but
did not know the grammar thoroughly. 
She has not studied french since coming
from Germany. I could not pay for German
and french both, and thought it best
to wait until she is out of school forthe latter. If she could go to Julie for 
a year - she could learn more french
than she could acquire at school here 
in a long time. Don't you think so?
Her german is so far useful now, that
she two lessons a week. She gets 
only half a dollar a lesson to be sure, but 
as the two ladies ? are among the wealthiest
in Milwaukee of course they are proportionately 
mean. She has one music lesson per
week, but has a grand teacher, and is
making progress. I do not believe in
girls graduating at sixteen but in 
Bessie's case there is no help for it.
She is in the Swain class, and, the best 
scholar therein, altho' the girls are all 
three and four years older than she - 
Bess is very clever, and if she has a chance 
will make a splendid woman. I tell you
all this for she is your girl you know.
Any suggestions you have to make darling
concerning her, I shall be glad to hear.
I am so thankful for the books you send 
me. The cold has isolated me so, I have,
had nothing to read for ages. The Anstic of Haccrine
is an especial favorite with me. it is such a rare &
fine pleasure to read a story in such a perfect 
language. His stories are sad as death, and his
women are almost always weak and wicked
but his men are sometimes superb - and cheats
one into the belief that such creatures are possible

[*Have you ever read Bauen Homes by him -*]